How to manage the heavy drinking culture at my company?
I work in a commodities group. All things considered, I am very lucky to have my job. Compensation is amazing, pretty nice team, I enjoy the product, etc.
After doing this several years, I believe there is a pervasive drinking culture at my firm. Although definitely pretty common at many places in the industry.
So many lunch meetings where having 4+ drinks is common. The major conventions are a bit of a drinking fest. Again, golf days, football games, etc also become a very "lubricated" affair.
Believe me, I enjoy these events just as much as any. And I do believe there is value in client entertainment, relationship building, etc. Sure beats sitting in an office.
But it gets exhausting when it's ALL THE TIME. Also, I firmly believe several people at my shop have actual drinking problems. Like, the type where every single activity - work or personal - revolves around alcohol. And then there's other coworkers who drink a lot less.
As I progress in my career, and start to be included in more of these things, I'm worried. I'm worried that I will get grossly out of shape. I'm worried that it will be hard on my relationship. And I'm worried about developing a drinking problem. I have first-hand experience in my family with alcoholism...it ain't pretty.
For people that work at places like this, how can you moderate drinking while not limiting your career?
One legitimate tip I've heard is "When you're pouring everyone else's drink, nobody notices how much you have had (or haven't). Also, just having excuses to dip out early some times.
As long as you’re fun, idk why it matters if you drink or not. It’s not like they’re counting your drinks to make sure you’ve consumed enough alcohol
Get a fucking soda, u idiot
Why do you call people idiots and pussies every chance you get. It’s kinda sad dude.
Compared to him, everyone is a pussy and an idiot
All hail king Pizz
Idk what’s prompting me to be so mean lately, I apologize
Have one drink and then order a second and just nurse it/use it as something to hold. When third round comes around your second drink is still 75% full. Rinse and repeat for the duration of the event.
Also agree with the above - no one sits there and counts your drinks, you are overthinking. Even you say there are others who drink a lot less. As long as you're not acting like a narc just don't say anything about it, try to still participate and be fun, and it won't be an issue.
Cool! Thank you.
Agreed - not being a Narc is the most important
Our firm has had what I would call a pretty heavy drinking culture, especially at internal events - but it does extend to conferences, client stuff, etc. It does not include lunch drinking - that's a huge no no here - but people love partying.
Myself? Part of it has come due to age and my role within the firm - I can simply say 'buzz off' (no pun intended) if I don't feel like partaking. I've also simply learned to be comfortable in social situations where you drink slowly, and still be social. Part of this is your personality - some people simply need that lubricant to be social and simply can't be 'fun' so to speak when not drinking with people. Moreover - it's really, really hard to stay in shape. When I was traveling, eating at nice dinners virtually every night, drinking - you HAVE to be disciplined in working out constantly and eating healthy. There's no magic trick.
The big question that you really need to answer for yourself is - do you want this as part of your job and culture? Is this going to hold you back - or worse, cap your career as you go forward? Some of it is manageable - but if you end up in a scenario where your clients expect entertainment and you just aren't there... that's one thing. Worse would be a culture that 'dings' you, so to speak, for not being part of the internal drinking or team building sessions. Be careful of that.
I know plenty of people who are very successful that don't drink, but hang out and party with the best of them. It takes a lot of self confidence in most cases - but as you get past 25 people just don't care as much if you are drinking or not. You can set your own limits. Period.
Thanks for the very sound advice! Yes, you understand it. In my type of role, partying/entertaining/etc is part of the gig. It's not so simple as just declining.
I would say that some people have gotten ahead by always saying yes to drinking with clients, golf tournaments, travelling, etc. These things can definitely have a strain on your personal life. However, I also think I'll be able to buzz off at some times.
It's old advice, but people remember how you made them feel - that's it. Period. If you play the 'host' and make sure that the golf outing goes off well, the cooler is stacked with beer and there's a great place to eat later - already setup and rolling - that's what matters. Really sensitive to alcohol? Grab a round or two with a 'vodka soda' or whatever. If they feel like you are all part of the same experience - that's what matters. Pick where it's worth adding stress to your life, and what you can say no to.
I know plenty of people who kill it at these roles - a good number barely drink or really don't drink outside of what they do. Hell - one guy I know was stone cold sober, but he knew how to entertain. Any place you needed to go - he had the hookup. Want this bar? Done. This club? Done. Tee time? Done. Show up to an event - you never had to think about the drink you wanted, etc. it was all setup.
Back when i worked in CRE brokerage i had the same issue. I would just ask the bartender for a club soda with a lime and cocktail straw. People thought i was drinking, but i wasnt. As my colleagues (and internal competitors) got more and more inebriated throughout the afternoon/night, I became more hydrated and aware. That is when I would inquire about their deal/client info and stay mindful of any new business leads. The next morning, I would come into the office early and lay the foundation for whatever prospects i was able to garner. My colleages would come in a little later, indisposed, unaware that I was capitalizing off of the secrets they exposed.
You are a psychopath, bravo
Soda water with lime, done.
LOL
Russians meanwhile: only 4 drinks? That's an amateur level
*Poles have entered the chat*
Getting sodas or no drinks never works. There's always the insecure people who are more worried about what you do then themselves. Order non alcoholic beers and drink 2-3 max. Don't let anyone get you a drink.
I haven't had a drink since I was 20 after saying some rude things at a work office party.
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