Another Black Monday

Following the 226-207 vote by the House against the infamous “bailout” , the market plummeted over 700 points today, leaving investers sufficiently stunned and frantically scrambling to the supposed safety (but who really knows anymore) of gold and Treasury bonds. At this rate we’ll all be out of a job as soon as yesterday, and can plan on spending our retirement years donning blue vests and saying “Welcome to Walmart” every day. Maybe we should just wipe Monday right off the calendar. Who do I talk to about that anyway?