How to say "No"

I found the single hardest thing to be saying "no" in my IBD SA last year, aka underpromising and overdelivering. Arguably in an intern position you want to say yes as much as possible since there's light at the end of the tunnel, but I think being tactful with no's will be helpful and necessary entering the FT role.

I've heard the basic response "Yes, I can do this, but Joe & Dave really want to see XYZ by Tue" ..but that didn't help me much.

Usually, I'd be asked "have you got a moment?". Before knowing what the person wants, I find turning him down here difficult and probably harmful.

Then, this is followed by explanation - maybe something small, maybe something larger, but explanation usually takes several minutes. Afterward I feel pressured to accept, because he just spent this time elaborating in detail.

What is the right time to indicate your capacity and say the "no"?

I suppose it breaks down to the following moments, and I don't know where to find the freedom to decline:

  • I think I need to know what the work is before I can decide whether I can do it or not (eg capacity for small, but no capacity for big urgent project)
  • I doubt I can ask "is it a lot?"
  • Therefore listen to associate explain the background and the job
  • Which afterward makes me feel he has invested enough time/effort that I must accept, or face a "wtf, why did I just stand here and waste my time" if not openly
6 Comments
 
MurdersNExecutions I've heard the basic response "Yes, I can do this, but Joe & Dave really want to see XYZ by Tue"
You're approaching it the right way, but maybe you're not saying it right. Once whoever approached you is done explaining tell him that you will get that stuff to him, but that you have to finish your work for Joe & Dave first and it will take you some time. If that doesn't help then go back to Joe & Dave and tell them: "Hey i want to get this done quick, but XYZ also wants me to do work for him. What do you think in terms of timing?"
 
wallstasks
MurdersNExecutions I've heard the basic response "Yes, I can do this, but Joe & Dave really want to see XYZ by Tue"
You're approaching it the right way, but maybe you're not saying it right. Once whoever approached you is done explaining tell him that you will get that stuff to him, but that you have to finish your work for Joe & Dave first and it will take you some time. If that doesn't help then go back to Joe & Dave and tell them: "Hey i want to get this done quick, but XYZ also wants me to do work for him. What do you think in terms of timing?"

So it's fine to have that conversation afterward. Sounds good. I always just already felt committed after the explanation.

 

It's all about managing expectations.

If you have an idea of how long a project takes give them a time table expectation.

If you have other things to do for lower level managers let them know the higher up asked you to do something.

 

You have to keep in mind that you're a summer analyst. Since you're only there for a limited time, people will not be hesitant to give you a lot of work. They'd rather burn you out then a full-time analyst who they need for another year. Also the summer analyst program to a certain extent is designed to give full-time analysts a bit of a break anyways.

Since the internship is only 10 months you should take on a lot of work. What you want to avoid is to set wrong expectations. That's why you always want all of your teams to know what else you're working on. If you do that they can tell you what's most important and tell everyone else that you're prioritizing their work.

 
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