A man trying to keep it together while his life falls apart...
Hey guys,
Apologies for the long post but I think it's worth a read or so I hope..
I'm trying to get a job in trading (ideally FX). I have two summer internships on a FX desk and had a full time offer but life interfered
My background is non-traditional. I graduated from a semi-target (think Southern Ivy) with lousy grades. I dealt with some rather unpleasant medical issues in college but it's no excuse. I was lazy and chased girls most of the time.
After I graduated I worked for a business incubator (something I totally recommend for those having a hard time finding work). If anyone's interested PM me and I'll let you know about my experience.
Then I got into a horrible car accident. I had to be revived in the medivac and was left with a shattered body including a broken back. When I woke up several days after, I asked the doctor when I could play golf again (I played golf in college) and he said, "Son, you'll never walk let alone play golf again." Asshole.
I set out to prove him wrong. Physical therapy for 3-4 hours/day is awful but after two years of relentless effort, I made an appointment with the doctor and walked into his office and said, "Remember me? You said I'd never walk again. Go fuck yourself." and walked out.
I can walk again (with a limp) and am hitting golf balls again.
I'm dating a girl whose family has major connections. Last night, I went to dinner with a major HF manager's wife and she vowed to send my resume and cover letter to everyone she knows in the industry. Apparently, I made a good impression. I'm having dinner with her husband in a couple weeks and she just emailed me to say he's excited to meet me.
My concern is my background is so non-traditional that as much as I can get future employers to like me, they won't get beyond my past.
Through the months in hospitals and in bed, I developed a real sense of what's important in life: family, friends, health and purpose. I also read up on trading extensively, managed my parents retirement fund and played poker. I was pretty successful in these endeavors. I also tutor GRE/GMAT, if anyone wants advice on that I can help.
Basically, my strategy is this as follows. I'm going to try to sell my personality, resilience and intelligence while minimizing my academic shortcomings, lack of experience and gaps.
I don't want any firm to think that I'm a sob story and want a pity hire. I can do the job and I'll clean toilets if I have to.
I don't want firms to think that I think by virtue of getting royally fucked up in an accident that I deserve anything. It doesn't make me more qualified but it demonstrates my character.
I'd greatly appreciate any advice on my thoughts here. I don't have an exact question I want answered but any advice would be appreciated.
stop thinking about your background and just take advantage of every opportunity you have you know your background is shit so you need to network as much as possible which you seem to be doing i don't know if it projects when you actually talk to people but this whole my background this my background that doesn't come off well at all and calling attention to it won't go well (not saying you do this)
I appreciate the candor and I'm taking every opportunity I get.
I don't really talk about it unless asked but I will get asked about it. The point of even mentioning is I think it shows character. I've always been one to root for the underdog. I've asked a number of people about how to address it in an interview and the opinion is pretty evenly split between playing it up and just casually mentioning it as an explanation for resume gaps.
I tend to interview very well so it's not going to be a disaster either way but I also don't have a lot of room for error.
OP did you deal with PPP theroms?
As an intern? No. Lots of hedge effectiveness and market summaries.
In Economics classes, yes. I understand it well.
Did the firms you were at have models for it tho?
I would definitely play it up. It allows you to talk about how you goofed around before the accident but it was a real wake up call for your life. It as at least a pretty huge differentiator. I think a lot of people would respect all that you had to do just to live a normal life again.
Good luck.
Felt really bad for you until I read this. You are truly a fucking asshole.
I understand you were going through a rough patch at the time, but the way you brag about such a dick move is truly disgusting.
Ask Kevin Ware why he won't watch the video of his leg snap. Recovery is all about the right mindset and this guy had no idea how I'd respond (fortunately, he motivated me). I told him to fuck himself not to feel like a badass but to make a point. Never take someone's hope away. There was more to the conversation but I paraphrased. I didn't do it for myself, I did it for other patients who might not have the same constitution as I do. Imagine if he told me that I'd never walk then I was released, went home and blew my brains out. He was an arrogant young dude and that was the only way to make my point to him. Well, I could have sued him so getting cursed out is pretty light.
There is a civil and polite way of doing the same thing.
What the hell could you have sued him for exactly? What were your damages? Do you have even the slightest understanding of how the court system works?
No matter how you try to justify it, you're still an asshole.
On an unrelated note though, you say you had a full time offer at one point. I realize this was probably over a year ago, but have you tried going to whoever gave you the offer in the first place and asking for advice?
I just "re-formed" you. HAHAHA
OP, don't worry about your 'background', it's a victory story and I'm impressed with you. I'm pretty sure that anyone doing the hiring will be as well. A large part of moving forward will be polishing your 'story' so you get maximum support, so start by focusing your effort there. It's the one thing you can control the most, and the more people you can draw to your side, the better. If you like, PM me your resume and I'll try to help. I'd also like to know more about this 'incubator', as I have a couple of friends who are looking for work and I've run out of ideas to help get them on the grid, so this may be a solution.
Here's a potential starting point for how think about how you market yourself: "I've just spent the last two years recovering from a very serious health disaster, and I can't wait to get back in the game. I'd like to work here, what do I have to do?" You have the right attitude, now just work on how you present yourself. You got this.
u 2 would make a great pair
I want to like this guy, but not all mental toughness comes from "F*** You". In fact, the kind that doesn't come from "F*** You" is a lot easier to work around.
Honestly I can imagine the sentiment behind this since many doctor have extremely poor bedside manners and complete lack of sympathy. A close relative was told by a doctor that with 100% accuracy she was going to die of cancer within 6 months even after my relative cited easy to find research and 4 years later continues to live. I know that medical schools are stressing more the people to people aspect of their jobs. But that's neither here or there.
Honestly, you come off like a far bigger asshole than he ever could have. The only remotely douchey thing he did was quip back at IP, which in fairness, didn't make him look great but was totally understandable. I would be pissed off too, if someone came out and called me a liar and I went through what the OP said he went through. It's irrelevant if he didn't go through it (if that's the case it's on him and he deals with it). It's pretty pathetic that people are attacking this guy. Would you respond with a perfectly level head if you had to fight for 2 years just to be able to walk again.
All of you should just shut the fuck up. It's unbelievable the ego some of you exhibit, and quite frankly you should be embarrassed.
I may be reading too much into things, but I think the doctor said you'd never walk again precisely to inspire you to what you did in fact manage to do.
Way to take this thread totally off-topic reformed.
He brought up a totally irrelevant point in his story and seemed to make a big deal about it.
My point in picking that out was that that particular item could very easily offend a potential employer and getting into a discussion over it is not in his best interest.
Let's just drop it. No worries.
I don't see your problem. You seem to have it covered from your schmoozing with the HF wife to your meeting with the HF manager it all looks clear skies dude. Keep doing what youre doing and good for you for rising above
Man opie, those feels while reading your story.
I was from a non target also. It is all about selling personality and the fact that you know that you have to work harder than others. Hang in there man! You'll make it.
Hi Eddie! How is your other thread going?
http://www.wallstreetoasis.com/forums/i-got-perfect-gresgmats-and-am-wi…
I'm not quite ready to break out the T-word for this, but I'm awfully close.
You realize that GPA, success and test taking ability aren't necessarily correlated right? I explained that I was a fuck up in life on this very thread but that has nothing to do with my intelligence which has nothing to do with getting high test scores. Life isn't linear.
If it all really is true, more power to you, but I am scratching my head on this one.
Oh well, at least you haven't gone to any basement meetings at the privately owned federal reserve where people were wearing red pointy hats and laughing about how they were going to give the world's economy to the Rothschilds.
At least you haven't asked whether it's possible for a sociopath and convicted rapist can land a job as a banker at Goldman Sachs, and how to interview that way.
At least you haven't asked if impotence would be a problem for getting hired a convertibles trader.
Oh well, if this IS a troll attempt or some sort of weird sociology study, I give you at least a B+ on subtlety.
Oh well, I will not be the person to call troll, but I will be the person to suggest that maybe the gullible should maybe be a little wary in this thread.
Maybe you don't like that a deadbeat troll like me can get an audience with a dude who runs a $4b fund?
OP you come off like a dick, but I digress. Your background isn't bad at all; two FX internships from a recent college grad is pretty solid. GPA is just another means to an end. Overall your resume sounds good enough to get some interviews.
For me, the story became epic at the car accident line.
Btw I PM you regarding Business Incubator!
I wouldn't hire this guy. Sure I sympathize his situation but he has a piss poor attitude.
This is what I'm looking for. How is my attitude piss poor?
r u that oblivious?
eddienero are you democrat or republican
That's a tough one. Both are equally disgusting. I'm some sort of libertarian.
I'd believe this story.. doesn't sound that crazy.
Right, so... story seems believable enough. Maybe. Don't know. Doesn't really matter, either; if it's true, then good on you for being resilient enough to fight your way through it, Eddie.
You're still a bit of a wanker, though.
Definitively a wanker. Spent about 2 hours trying to help people prep for the GRE/GMAT for free here since I felt like enough people would read this thread and help out that I should give back. What a wanker.
Clearly not a wanker 24/7, but enough of one enough of the time that I'm clearly not the only one who thinks you can come across as a dick.
Maybe you're angry about the accident, or something. I don't know. I suppose I would be, too. I just... think you should chill out a little, man.
As questionable as it sounds, you could use the injury as a differentiator. You can use this experience as an example of a time you over came some hardship (applicable to many fit questions). If you're tough enough to muscle it through this accident, then you are tough enough to break in.
Op, i think u got a bloody good story to tell, go change the world (or get rich). Clearly, you are really resilient and smart and personable.
To sum it up OP: Overall you seem like a good person, but you come off a little brash sometimes. Coming off brash is fine because everyone has their own personality, but when applying for jobs and interviewing I would tone it down. As for your background and resume, I personally think it's solid. Again, your GPA shouldn't hold you back from too many opportunities because of your work experience. Getting an entry level job on Wall St. requires significantly less effort than learning to walk after being paralyzed. You have the tenacity to get it done, good luck.
OP:
1.). Good on you for overcoming the car accident. 2.) Stop acting like a douche.
OP, it's one thing to blow off some steam or give people the real story, it's another to EFFECTIVELY SELL your story. In an open forum like this, you really are free to speak your mind, it's why I spend so much time here. However, when you are doing things on the fly, you'll need a much more condensed and refined presentation so that you can turn on a dime and take advantage of every opportunity along the way. If someone has time to go into the whole story, great, and then for general networking purposes you can travel a bit lighter with the personal data. You already have a core of support, so now you need to ...and take this at face value... start putting your past behind you. Free yourself from it, it's done. The whole point is to use what you have to get what you want, and if it's not useful, you have to let it go and get over it. I was a psych major, so I'm always going to suggest some form of counseling or mentorship, it's just my personal bias, but you will deal with things in your own way. Some audiences may get a kick out of someone telling a doctor who made an egregious mistake to fuck themselves, I got a kick out of it. Others with more delicate sensibilites may be turned off if you're too raw right out of the gate. Everyone has their challengs and some people get hit with a whole lot more, trust me, I get it: life can get pretty fucking ugly. Just don't let it make you ugly too.
Reach out to people like you're doing, and use your experience to empower both yourself and others. There's always going to be pure haters (see: Westboro ministry) but for the most part people want to see the good guy win. Be the good guy here.
Your recent posts haven't been congruent with your personality as conveyed consistently throughout your posting history (remember your comments about assholes, always urging people to give people the benefit of the doubt). If you take a step back and look at this thread, objectively as I have, before weighing in. This guy didn't come across as a douche at all until that "reformed" guy started calling him an asshole and you called him a troll and essentially said he is a liar.
Hmm, now lets stop and think about this without any biases. If you were to undergo a massive trauma, such that you were fighting for your very life, and were told that you were never going to walk again, but you battled back painstakingly over the course of 2 Years... that's right... 2 Years of uncertainty, self doubt, questioning why this happened to you and if you were ever get back to simple things like walking, hitting golf balls, and just being you, do you think you might get a little bit upset if someone said that you were "a complete fucking asshole" because in a moment of emotion you told a guy that said you would never walk again to fuck off? I bet you the doctor he told to fuck off doesn't harbor as much resentment for him as you guys do... and that should speak volumes about everything that is wrong with this thread.
If for some reason he isn't being truthful (make no mistake, I personally think he is because I like to see the good in people, not the bad) what are you losing by believing him either way? It's an inspiring story, and the fact that all of you people feel the need to try to tear him down and make him feel bad about himself for snapping at people should be cause for pause.
You are all so quick to call some random guy on an internet forum a fucking asshole because of the way he told his story, and in the same breath you are self righteous enough to think that you are above responding to the doctor in the same way he did?
How the fuck does that work? You're wayyy more out of line than he was... How do you not see that? I would love to be able to do the jedi mind tricks y'all are able to in order to convince myself I am in the right when I am so clearly wrong.
On the very small chance he was making all this up... who cares. I can live with naively believing a heartfelt story of triumph... call me a sucker. What I can't live with is acting like an utter shit head, telling off people who have been through something I could never even fathom. Why don't you guys take your condescending egotism to one of the fashion or prestige threads... it has no place here.
Lolz, 2 years of recovery - clearly never been to the VA.
This is a truly inspiring story. It hits close home for me since I'm an avid golfer. Great to hear that you are getting back out on the links and I wish you all the best.
In my experience, it's better to not talk about your past unless specifically asked. If you've made it to the super day/interview/office visit they don't really care about your past. They want to know how you will benefit them in the future. From your post, it seems as though you are extremely determined and even more hard working. If you can send the same signal to the interviewer, you'll have no problem getting the job. These are two characteristics that show you will benefit them in the future.
I had trouble with this in my early interviewing career, but read 101 Great Answers to the Toughest Interview Questions by Ron Fry and it really helped me get more comfortable at highlighting my character strengths indirectly in the interviews.
Best of luck
http://www.amazon.com/Great-Answers-Toughest-Interview-Questions/dp/159…
I appreciate all the feedback (good and bad) and will respond more fully when I have a chance since y'all took the time to do so for me which is great. I actually played 9 holes for the first time in years today so I'm going to go eat a giant steak but will be back later. Thanks again.
Since when did WSO become alcoholics anonymous?
Yeah, a lot of people got the wrong impression at first, myself included.
I definitely jumped the gun on this one.
If it means anything, I'm sorry as well. My comments were completely out of line. Looking back, I have no idea what possessed me to write them.
Still, I'm confused about what the point of this whole thing was...
I'm thinking get a masters would be most efficient if the guy doesn't find work within a few months.
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