Happy Father's Day and the Children of the Affluent

Happy Father's Day to all the caring, hard-working, self-sacrificing dads out there this Sunday. It's fun to think about how I'll raise my kids with the right values. I'm not a father yet, but I presume some professionals in finance have concerns for raising spoiled entitled children, assuming you have or plan on having a family. This Forbes article describes different approaches to parenthood by affluent financiers and business moguls:

On one side of the spectrum, we have Warren Buffett.

Buffett’s second-oldest son Peter, a musician, says that the message was loud and clear growing up: money wasn’t what mattered in life. Instead, it was finding something you loved to do and then doing it.

On the other side of the spectrum, there's

22-year-old heiress Ekaterina Rybolovleva buys an $88 million New York condo

And somewhere in the middle, there's Donald Trump and a healthy dose of nepotism.

Donald Jr., Ivanka, and Eric Trump are all part of the family business, and reportedly not just as figureheads. Evidently, this isn’t by accident: their father raised them to be astute students of real estate.

I'd hate to be a Debby Downer either, but the article describes a study done by a psychology professor from Columbia University that

children of parents with a median annual household income of $125,000 to $130,000 have depression rates that are twice the national average. She blames this on parents who aren’t involved, or who replace quality time with their kids with lavish purchases.

Thoughts? I'm not the one to judge, and people can raise their children however they want, but I'm curious to see the WSO community thoughts on this issue of parenting and entitlement.

 
Best Response

I have a son and think about this issue alot. It's a tough one, because on one hand you want to spend time with your child but on the other you need (and want) to spend time working to get to where you want to be for your own reasons and also so you can be a good provider and role-model. There is a balance to be struck, and everyone has to find their own equilibrium point. But if I had to put a number on it I would say that it is somewhere around 55-60 hours a week on average. There may be stretches of days, weeks, months where you will have to work extra hours but if you are doing more or less on a consistent basis then you are either a) working too much to be an active parent to your child or b) not working hard enough to provide for your children and showing them how to be build a strong work ethic.

Also, another important issue is to make sure that even if you have to work a lot and are gone that you keep the promises you make. Kids can tolerate not seeing a parent very much, but speaking from experience, the disappointments in childhood come from being promised something (like a trip to the ballpark or zoo), getting your hopes up, and then getting let down.

Now, I'm going to put "Cats In the Cradle" on repeat and curl up into the fetal position.

"Hope for the best. Prepare for the worst. Capitalize on what comes."
 
TEX:
I have a son and think about this issue alot. It's a tough one, because on one hand you want to spend time with your child but on the other you need (and want) to spend time working to get to where you want to be for your own reasons and also so you can be a good provider and role-model. There is a balance to be struck, and everyone has to find their own equilibrium point. But if I had to put a number on it I would say that it is somewhere around 55-60 hours a week on average. There may be stretches of days, weeks, months where you will have to work extra hours but if you are doing more or less on a consistent basis then you are either a) working too much to be an active parent to your child or b) not working hard enough to provide for your children and showing them how to be build a strong work ethic.

Also, another important issue is to make sure that even if you have to work a lot and are gone that you keep the promises you make. Kids can tolerate not seeing a parent very much, but speaking from experience, the disappointments in childhood come from being promised something (like a trip to the ballpark or zoo), getting your hopes up, and then getting let down.

Now, I'm going to put "Cats In the Cradle" on repeat and curl up into the fetal position.

Thanks for your insight. I'm sure your son thinks highly of you!

 

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I am permanently behind on PMs, it's not personal.

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