Taking Chill, Non-Finance Job for Mental Health vs. Plowing Through? [NEED ADVICE]
I'll keep things brief - I'm admittedly currently in a position that most people on this forum want - 2nd-year analyst in an MF PE analyst program who secured an offer to join a different MF's associate program during on-cycle recruiting last year (decided to recruit mostly due to industry vertical / culture regions).
I knew coming into PE that I did not want to do finance beyond 4 years / have no true interest in the sector, but decided to recruit anyway primarily due to short-term comp (come from a true middle-class background and graduated with high 5 figures' worth of student loans that I took out to attend a super target) that I have mostly paid off and aim to completely pay off with my next bonus.
I, however, am completely miserable - I wake up during weekdays with nothing to look forward to, feel constantly suicidal, and have frequent panic attacks. I never used to struggle with anxiety / depression but have developed both over the course of the last year. In fact, I wish I took my IB offers junior year of college since at least then I would have more of a community struggling with the same issues rather than feeling like an awkwardly young associate held to much higher standards than my friends in IB despite not having any experience in the industry.
I recently received an offer for a corporate position in marketing (had a previous connection to the position so didn't really have to interview). The comp is ~60% of my current comp / well less than half of the comp advertised in my associate position market offer. Given that I plan to transition to corporate anyways in ~3 years just wondering if that makes sense to do now as brand management is actually a career can see myself in, albeit if it's awkward. Given that I have an associate offer in hand as well, however, also wondering if it's worth staying ~7-8 months until late spring and forgoing my bonus to have 2-3 months to recover before coming back to the industry.
Really at a loss and the corporate offer explodes in 2 days so would appreciate any and all advice.
PE can be super toxic at times bud and it sounds like it's taken a pretty rough toll on you. It's just not for everyone. That's not to say you can't hack it from a competence standpoint, clearly you can if you're a MF analyst and secured an ASO role. If you already plan to go the corporate route, have a warm connection there that made securing a spot easier, and are genuinely having suicidal thoughts/panic attacks, I'd say just jump the ship and go there. Nothing about this job is worth your health and life is short, no reason to force yourself to stay somewhere that makes you incredibly unhappy if it holds no bearing on your long-term career goals. Hope you have close friends/family you can talk to about the personal stuff or that the role change makes life a bit easier for you man. God bless and good luck.
Man, know the feeling. Been there!
If you don't like it now, you're definitely not going to like it as an Associate.
Once you leave, you'll feel better. If you have a bonus coming soon enough that you can slog until then, do that.
However, if you are going to do irreparable mental harm, or you are actually ideating steps to suicide, then you need to quit immediately. I thought about blowing my brains out a million times in PE but I never actually got into the headspace of making plans. That is different. That is a sure sign you are actually on a very, very, very bad path. If you are anything close to that, you should go explain that to your boss and quit tomorrow. If you tell any other human being that your mental health has gotten so bad that you cannot work another day in a way that conveys the true emotional urgency, in an emotionally honest and tactful way, they will understand in a very human way.
Hey there, it sounds like you're in a tough spot. It's important to remember that while finance can be a rewarding career, it's not the be-all and end-all. Your mental health is paramount and it's crucial to prioritize it.
From the sounds of it, you're not enjoying your current role and it's taking a toll on your mental health. If you see a future in brand management and the role excites you, it might be worth considering, even if the compensation is lower. Remember, job satisfaction and mental peace are priceless.
On the other hand, if you feel you can manage for a few more months, you could stay on until spring, secure your bonus, and then take some time off to recover before starting your new role. This could also give you a financial cushion.
However, only you can make this decision as you know your limits and what you can handle. It's important to have a support system during this time, so consider reaching out to trusted friends, family, or a mental health professional.
Remember, it's okay to choose your happiness and mental health over a job. There's a whole world outside of finance and plenty of successful people who have taken non-traditional paths. Good luck with your decision!
Sources: Staying a third year as a PE associate vs. doing something nontraditional, Private Equity Associate Regretting Decision, Gap period between IB and PE, burnout / moving forward
I would tough it out through 1 year as an associate and leave once you secure that first bonus. Short term pain for long term gain.
This place has turned into an echo chamber so all you will get is losers telling you to take the corporate gig, your mental health is paramount and blah blah blah. Most of your responses will actually be from people younger than you that have never had bills to pay on a consistent basis.
But the cash cushion you build now will be valuable to your future self.
Look man, it's not mature to be calling people losers; maybe we want different things in life. I work in the industry and am older than OP. Yes, there are bills to pay, but OP doesn't have to live in a HCOL city his whole life. Maybe this corporate gig will allow him to work somewhere LCOL and he can escape the rat race? Lifestyle inflation is a real thing.
I'd rather that advice than having the depression lead to a more sinister fate.
https://www.wallstreetoasis.com/forum/off-topic/hows-your-2023-lookin-so-far#comment-3185800
Dude you posted this in another thread - perhaps you should do some reflecting on your own choices and their impact on your mental health and happiness before telling other people what to do. By your own admission, you don't exactly have a great personal track record on this topic and most certainly aren't in a great position to be calling anyone else a "loser".
Yea but all I have are first world problems. I mean look what I grumbled about.
I clear a million a year with my wife and the only reason I can’t retire early is lifestyle creep. That’s on me, or more accurately, on me that I can’t convince my wife to stop living like a damn kardashian.
Then I complain I’m at a highly ranked group for my product of lev fin. I could recruit to a crappy bank, but my ego couldn’t handle it. That’s not a real problem. That’s an ego problem I could rectify if I had to.
My final complaint was more tongue in cheek / humble brag. I’m set to inherit a decent amount, I’m not even sure how much. In my dreams it’s enough to retire instantly, and in my head it will likely be enough to allow me to not ever stress about being fired. I mean I whined my elders are in great shape lol. Of course they are more important than money.
It wasn’t a real cry for help. But the void of internet is a good place to whine about first world problems. Can you imagine the looks of disgust if I whined to a real life friend about my prestige and inheritance problems lol.
You seem to take the most umbrage to the term loser. What adjective would you use to describe the majority is users who give advice? Under 25, no life experience, limited work experience, making prestige lists they couldn’t possibly know, crying about the industry they want to break into, always blaming others for their problems, crying 24/7 about boomers or diversity or toxic banks they willingly choose to work at.
Isn't that what a loser is? A complainer? Giving advice in bad faith? Always telling others to eschew money due to a short term hardship?
The OP isn’t a loser, I said the forum is flush with them. Have you read the whining that permeates the site? The advice that is given, and any time I push back, the advice falls flat and they resort to insults? It’s like the blind leading the blind around here. These kids are easier to trigger then the average Reddit user.
My advice is sound. He’s on a lucrative path. Quitting now would be a loser mentality. I didn’t see anything in his post about suicidal ideation or imminent danger. It’s a tough job and we all went through it. Why would a job that pays a kid $200k be easy.
He should slog through for that first bonus and then bounce. And who knows, the new associate role could be an awesome team and his mental health could improve.
But if he quits like you cry babies suggest, he’ll be depressed AND broke. Or he can at least secure another job before quitting.
The ultimate irony is that the advice most often given, quit with nothing lined up cause your bank is super toxic, will actually cause way more mental and financial harm. But whatever, as usual I’m the sole voice of dissent and reason against a tide of entitled and thin skinned young kids. When you hit 30, you’ll be like oh now I get what that random dude was trying to say on WSO.
Get out and don’t look back. Plenty of ways for smart, hardworking, ambitious young people to make money outside of the narrow PE world and without feeling suicidal.
There is a multitude of ways to be successful
Take the job.
Why not at least try and see if the Associate role is better? You cite that you recruited for another firm to change industry coverage + bc of culture reasons.
Would it be possible the new group has better culture / the industry you invest in is more interesting than your current group?
If anything you could be a rockstar in your new group and have mental health. And if the new role doesn’t work out within 6-12 months and you still feel completely miserable somehow, then you can easily pivot into a more relaxed role or industry given where you came from (2 MF firms). You could even go downstream to a mm or credit firm, maybe in other geographies, where people typically only work 50-65 hours per week.
If you’re smart enough to get offers at that many pe places or in other fields you haven’t even worked in, you can do well regardless.
Take some time to relax
No job is worth your mental health or suicidal thoughts. Quit and take the new job.
As you mentioned you are suicidal, call the suicide hotline and get help with your mental health. You can also find a therapist to help you through this.
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