Cover Letter review for Private Equity

Hi Guys,
I am looking for an internship opportunity in the private equity sector. I come from an Engineering background but currently doing a master in Finance. Should I customize my cover letter better? Please criticize freely :)

Attachment Size
cover letter.pdf 42.5 KB 42.5 KB
 

This look pretty good. If you can add bullet points; people are more likely to read those.

"It's very easy to have too many goals and be overwhelmed by them... The trick is to find the one thing you can focus on that represents every other single thing you want in life." -- @"Edmundo Braverman"
 

You sound clichéd as shit. It's a wall of text...

[quote]The HBS guys have MAD SWAGGER. They frequently wear their class jackets to boston bars, strutting and acting like they own the joint. They just ooze success, confidence, swagger, basically attributes of alpha males.[/quote]

thanks guys, i realized that it is too long and shitty. I will rewrite from the beginning but the problem is that i am an engineer and now doing a master in Finance with no previous experience in it so i don't know how to express my financial skills. Can I write the skills i acquired from the practical experience of engineering?

 
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