A study by Boston College has found that the extremely wealthy fear greater things than the beach house having termites, Forbes misspelling their name, or the kids picking up a hispanic accent from the housekeeper. Nor are their innermost fears spilling caviar on their ascot, not being able to find a dessert wine that perfectly compliments the imported goat cheese, or leaving their favorite cashmere cardigan in Paris."He found that the rich—especially the inheritors of vast fortunes—have unique sets of worries, and face the added difficulty of knowing that many despise or envy them. “Often the word rich becomes a pejorative,” Kenny says. “It rhymes with bitch. I’ve been in rooms and seen people stand up and say, ‘I’m Bob Kenny, and I’m rich.’ And then they burst into tears.”
From "Secret Fears of the Super Rich"
The study surveyed 165 households, 120 of them having at least $25 million in assets, with an average net worth of $78 million. Paul G. Schervish, of Boston College's Center on Wealth and Philanthropy, along with Robert A. Kenny, a psychologist and architect of the study, explain the study's findings in an article for The Atlantic.
To summarize for those of you who don't want to read the article, some of the things they found the ultra wealthy worry about are:
- Consumption becoming commonplace to the point where even the most extravagant purchases provide little joy
- Less fortunate people viewing them negatively
- Feeling as though they have no right to complain about anything
- Relationships being influenced by their wealth
- Inheritors face little motivation to accomplish anything successful in life
I can understand some of these fears, while a few of them seem trivial to me in comparison with the easier lifestyle their wealth provides. I would certainly worry about my children having little motivation in life if I were leaving them enough money to not have to work a day in their lives. I'd also be hesitant every time I met someone new, wondering if they were interested in meeting me, or the hope of meeting my money. I may even feel the need to be humble, and as though I couldn't complain about anything.
But I can't see the myself reaching the point where the envy of others causes me concern, or where I no longer feel joy using my money to lead the life I'd like live.
My favorite quote of the article appears near the end, when discussing the effect wealth has on relationships."One issue that Kenny says comes up frequently is the question of at what point in a relationship to reveal one’s wealth—a disclosure he makes sound as fraught as telling your date you have herpes."
I urge you to compare the reaction you'd have on a first date if you told a woman you had $25 million to her reaction if you told her you had herpes. I guarantee your night ends a lot better in one of those situations.
Being wealthy can be very isolating, and often in order to get there, you have to focus on and prioritize other things besides people.
I think once you go beyond spending about $200K/year on a family of four, you start to put a gulf between yourself and the people around you. Well before you get to that point, money stops making you significantly happier. After that, only people and friends can make you happier.
But the problem is that the rich and the upper middle class have lost sight of all of this over the past 30 years. We keep getting worried that we're going to get left behind. It's become an unhealthy obsession. I honestly think we'd all be a lot happier if we did something to cap incomes for a year or two, shake us out of our obsession, and get us to refocus on the things that really matter in life.
I'm going to assume you are joking about the cap, Illini. Look, this is the quintessential manifestation of the remarkable human quality of becoming blaise about something that is completely incredible. 500 years ago you would have to enslave an entire nation to live the lives of luxury they have. Today, you can accumulate that wealth by helping people via the marketplace. But, their seemingly confusing response is not unexpected.
Human perception lies in changes, not actual states. We are programmed to perceive change, not static conditions- one can speculate why (sudden silence or sudden loud noise could indicate danger, with respect to evolution). This is why, for example, when times are good, people at the lowest rungs are affirmatively OK with wealth disparity because they see themselves moving forward, relatively speaking. Conversely, if they perceived they are falling behind they view the disparity negatively. But, if things are static, people don't know what to feel. They feel stuck, an inescapable despondency, but of what, they couldn't tell you. It's not that they are starving or dying, they just don't feel as if they are moving. This is a very powerful psychological phenomena that is not limited to purely metaphysical self-examination. For example, if you are driving 75 mph for an hour, eventually you'll feel as if you are moving at an relatively slow speed- highway hypnosis is the Driver's Ed term. In the end, no matter how much money you have you're still human, with human tendencies- there is no infinitely happy; to quote Warren Zevon, 'the rich folks suffer like the rest of us'.
This quote is true but people who are not rich don't feel the same way. Just read the comments on Yahoo, or NYT and you'll be able to figure that out.
It doesn't matter what the 'not-rich' think. The article is about the very real psychological and emotional problems of the rich. Just because some commenter doesn't think anyone can have a significant psychological issue after clearing $10 million doesn't mean that is the case. This is why the rich refuse to air this problem publicly- the unsympathetic response.
Illini, I'll just leave your assertions about the Great Depression alone for now. That is an enormous debate that I cannot handle right now.
I think it's unfortunate the government had to be so heavy-handed. Society would have turned out a lot better if we'd let the RICH decide how the money THEY earned was used to help make the country a better place to live.
I grew up very poor and can assure you that is worse than being rich, but I'm sure being rich does distance you. I already experience that to some degree with old friends making weird comments like, "I wish I made X a year," basically guessing how much I make. Or if a friend is in town and we're going to grab dinner, sometimes they will say, "Okay, but let's go somewhere reasonable, I'm not a millionaire like you." Even if you live low to the ground like I do (I'm practically in the same boat as Illini with his rusted out Honda), people treat you differently if they think you have money. I've stopped telling new people what I do for a living and just say that I'm a bean counter financial analyst -- it makes life easier if I dumb it down.
What does the great depression have to do with rich people's happiness? And for that matter, why is it then when the government actually cut spending and used a laissez-faire approach to the Depression of 1920-1921, the economy rebounded within a year? FDR turned what would have been a recession into the Great Depression, and only World War 2 finally bailed us out.
In any case, this reminds me of when poor people win the lottery. Studies show their happiness goes up dramatically initially, but then falls back to whatever it was pre-winnings. It shows that wealth is nothing without self-worth and internal pleasure of accomplishment. I think it's an evolutionary adaption - to never quite be happy with what you have but to use your current state as a new standard and always strive for more happiness.
Economically, I agree with you. Socialist policies made the Great Depression worse. But the one thing you forget is that the politics of envy is a genuine brick wall like the other economic brick walls out there. France, Russia, China, Cuba. They were all countries with extremely high GINIs and the perception that the wealthy were corrupt where the income stratification collapsed dramatically as a result of a political revolution. So even if FDR was bad news economically, he was very good news socially and politically. He managed to preserve most of our civil and economic freedoms whereas we would have lost them if we had another process for lowering GINIs.
Where's the #FirstWorldProblems guy on this one?
Well the duration of WW2 didn't bail us out, our economic position to the rest of the world did since we weren't bombed to hell and back did, those are semantics. But if you wanted to look at how to make 1%ers more pallatable to normal people, perhaps sociologists at the behest of those 1%ers should conduct studies on why there is such positive views on sports stars, music stars, movie stars, etc.
I think there is a very big distinction that isn't present here. What FDR offered was a perception of solving problems, not that any were even marginally solved. He fooled the public rather than solving the problem. Politicians make an art form out of this. He satiated a sentiment which the public thirsted for and made them believe that things were getting better. Although he utilized socialistic policies, there are probably many other ways with which he could have effected this goal. It's a classic bait and switch, which is the game the Fed has been playing. When in actuality the New Deal offered far more benefits to the companies contracted (and thus the 1%ers) than it did those that were being employed. The Fed, by increasing credit doesn't create taxes, they also change inflationary measurements when they don't appear coincide with goals, and screw the mid/lower income people that hold dollars. This is effectively putting a blanket over the problem and waiting for the next guy to deal with it, which is what Socialism in all of its idealism does.
The fact is that there aren't any rock solid answers to everything, history proves that people are much like markets, irrational. The path that must be followed is a bumpy one in which things don't go as they should, but it's about weathering things out in the best means. Perhaps there would have been revolution, perhaps there wouldn't have. Although on the face change would have appeared it wouldn't have solved anything. Unless you are of the opinion that lying to the sheep is the best method of controlling them, I don't see the logic. Also, the path begun by socialist policies are definitely going to have to be dealt with over the next 10 years. Unless global central planning were to take place, the US Gov't is going to have to do something drastic before the dollar loses its reserve currency status while other areas (China most specifically) position themselves to do that. Once this happens, it's game over in Washington when the world doesn't need US credit.
Did you read George Friedmans book The Next Ten Years
Been meaning to pick that up? Do you recommend it?
The uber rich people i know, most of them are douchebags
More money, more problems
Whether you're happy or not comes down to being able to do meaningful activities (feeling that what you do in this world matters to others), and/or having meaningful relationships (family, friends, etc.). Having a lot of money only makes one realize that money is just a cheap and poor substitute for all of this.
Having said that, I'd much rather be rich and miserable, than poor and miserable!
Folks, there's a reason the US has been one of the richest countries on earth for the past 200 years despite huge changes in the economy. It all boils down to the food supply. If we don't export food, the rest of the world, even China, starves. So I'm pretty sure we'll always be economically relevant.
I am gonna read the article later, but I was wondering if it makes a distinction between self-made vs inherited wealth?
Yes, it talks about the different problems people face when they earn their money vs when it's inherited. Typically, those that earn it themselves have less of the psychological problems mentioned
True. But that's only a serious problem if consumption is your life.
Who gives a fuck about some ignorant wanker who's jelly of a wealthy man, especially one that's self-made?
You can still complain about things, just not anything that's money-related.
I could see this being annoying. The solution is to either 1. not signal to people or tell them that you're rich, or 2. enjoy the golddiggers.
Then be like Warren Buffet and donate most of your inheritance to charity. That's prob what I'll do if I ever get filthy rich. There are better uses for money than simply sitting in the bank account of some fool who happened to be the son of a rich guy.
I haven't, been read a synopsis, and a little wiki background on him, looks interesting.
If I have kids, I'm planning to rent a tiny little apartment and have them live in it. My wife/partner and I would stay in a nicer place, and we'd just tell the kids that we're never home because we're both too busy working two jobs to keep them clothed, fed and in school. That'll teach 'em the value of a dollar.
Will let you guys know how it turns out. Look me up in 20 years.
I vote have multiple families with several children, and each year pull one of the kids names from each family and have them fight to the death. That'll teach them not to talk back to you...plus they could their names in the hat multiple times to receive more food and things from you.
Thanks OP, I learned something new from reading the article. I guess it proves we all worry about something, even the super rich. Money may or may not buy happiness, but it sure doesn't hide worries no matter how trivial.
I watched a video on Ted TV about the meaning of being wealthy. It's amazing because certain individuals who were worth say $200M didn't feel so well off considering that they associated with people that had 5x the amount of money.
Even for the regular guy, there is a simple psychology question... Would you prefer to make 80k if your neighbor is making 90k, or would you prefer to make 70 guy if your neighbor is making 60k? Most people would actually prefer the latter... it's all about benchmarks.
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