Asking for someone to write you a recommendation letter can be an anxiety ridden experience. What if they say no? Or what if they give you a template recommendation letter that they give every Tom, Dick, and Harry that strolls into their office. There’s a lot to consider when picking someone to write a recommendation letter for you and also a few things you can do to ensure you get the best letter possible. Read on for some tips
The prep work
Be prepared to provide a few talking points for the person you ask. It’s nice enough of them to offer to do you this favor, so make their job really easy. Include example of successful projects you’ve been, any accomplishments they should be familiar with and anything else you want them to highlight.
Also make sure you have all the materials they will need handy (any mailing addresses, envelopes, postage etc)
Picking someone
Cast a wide net. Most places will request 2- 3 references so try and pick a few people with different backgrounds and at different levels of the firm. Having people who can vouch for you with varying levels of experiences shows how well-rounded you are.
Also, when thinking of people make sure they can write well. It’s great if you can have an MD write a letter for you, but if they can’t make you sound good on paper it’s worthless.
Actually Asking
So you’ve picked out a few people and now it’s time to ask. There are four things to keep in mind here
- Ask early, you want to give them a couple of weeks before the deadline since in most cases they won’t get to it right away
- Flatter them. Let them know why you value their opinion
- Be sure to ask if they’d be comfortable writing a strong letter of recommendation. This gets them thinking of you in a positive light and will ensure that they write good things about you
- Never offer to write the letter outright for them. Simply suggest that you are willing to provide them talking points to make their job easier
The Waiting Period
Sending a reminder or two is OK. This is important to you so don’t let it sit on their lap. Send a reminder about 2 weeks before the deadline.
Saying Thank You
If possible, an in person thank you never goes un-noticed. Be sure to let them know you appreciate that they went out of their way for you.
2013 app season isn’t even underway yet, but what I haven’t been able to answer is, in a corporate environment where indicating that you don’t plan to carried out of there in a coffin and the possibility that you don’t bleed corporate logos might have them looking for a replacement before the day’s out, how do you ask your current employer for a reference letter? What’s been your experience?
How is asking for a reference letter an anxiety ridden experience? This isn't asking your 8th grade crush to the dance, it's asking someone who knows you to do you a favor. If that gives you anxiety, then you have bigger problems than getting a reference letter. The people you ask for letter's of recommendation are people who've worked for, know well and/or like you. Past employers are usually glad to lend you a hand, so long as you weren't the worst thing to happen to them since the housing collapse. Sorry if my response incited a panic attack.
I do not think it's easy to ask your associate / VP for a reference if you are switching from GS IBD to MS IBD, for example.
^ Cute. Did you get it out of your system?
For some people, asking for a reference letter can be a stressful experience. Minibar's post is a must read for anyone who needs to get a letter.
Minibar, thanks for the advice.
JPMortgage is right. I don't know how you passed the interview if you get anxious asking someone for a reference.
He's not just talking about asking your college teacher for a recommendation for your summer internship. Oftentimes it's about asking your current boss / employer to write it. Meaning you're implicitly letting them know that you want to leave the company and stop working for them to do something else. Depending on your situation and relationship with them, this could be anywhere along the spectrum from extremely easy to extremely difficult. Asking the favor isn't difficult at all, it's what the favor implies that can be stressful for many people.
Strive for a relationship with your superiors where asking for a reference letter shouldn't be even a problem.
Doing a kick-ass job for clients and asking them for a LOR later on down the road has worked well for me.
Only ask if you think you've done something good for the company. If yes, I'm sure you will receive a good reference letter. If not, what's the point of asking? Either you receive a bad reference letter which is useless or a fake good reference letter which will only get you into trouble. Self-knowledge is power.
Thanks for this, I agree with MFFL, when you're trying to springboard a boutique into a BB it can be offensive to your superiors so it can be a touchy subject.
From my own experience - writing reference letters is a pain in the behind. Not that the people who asked didn't deserve it, but when you're busy, it's not something you want to spend a lot of time on. I've found Reference-Letter .com a viable tool to save me some time.
How do you ask for a "reference"? (Originally Posted: 09/19/2011)
Kind of a weird question, but I was asked to provide a reference from a summer position I had for one of my full time recruiting processes and I just realized I don't really know what that is.
Do I ask the person to write some kind of letter? Would they simply reply to my email requesting the reference with a few sentences on what they thought of me? Those two options don't seem quite right...so is it that they simply consent to being listed as a "reference" and then I can throw their name out there and the recruiters can then reach out to this person?
The person writing your reference should know their name will be mentioned by you. So call up a colleague and ask if they feel comfortable providing one such reference.
How to ask for a reference letter? (Originally Posted: 09/17/2015)
What is the best way to go about asking for a letter of recommendation or reference letter... This may be bad but that is my biggest concern about applying to graduate school. I feel like I'll be annoying past workers or past teachers. Also, it's like changing the colleges I apply to. I had a long list of colleges I was going to apply to but I noticed some colleges like Duke, Ross, etc send a form to the references and make them answer it. If someone wants to apply to 5 places that would be so repetitive and bothersome IMO. So therefore, I am not going to apply to many colleges that I would like to. I don't know if I am overthinking this.....
Do not make such a drastic decision to potentially change which college you are going to because you are worried about annoying someone.
Yes, it may annoy them, it's possible. But your future is much, much more important than a small annoyance. I would just try to be vocal with your references and explain the situation and maybe even send them a small gift or something for their effort. If they are solid references, they should have no problem helping you.
How I went about asking people was I let them know up front that I would be applying to multiple schools and if they would be okay with writing multiple letters. If you have a good working relationship or had a good working relationship with your references, they should be more than willing to help you further your academic pursuits and career goals.
At the end of the day it's your life and like what VXTU said, you shouldn't worry about being an annoyance.
Best of luck!
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