Dealing with other men mean mugging you in public when wearing a nice suit
In my early 20s, here. I have a lot of Made to Measure suits from Suit Supply that deliver great value for the dollar. They shape my body silhouette very well. But when I'm in public, it seems like everyone, both male and female, is trying to size me up when I’m wearing a well tailored suit.
Like males will try to lock eye contact with me, and if I look away first (I’m tired/I don’t care about this whole alpha bravo shit), from my peripheral vision I can see them sneer as if they somehow one-upped me by getting me to look away first.
Same with attractive females as I cross paths with them. They will try to make and hold eye contact with me, and expect me to hold it but at the same time, some days I don't give a damn and look away. In the most genuine way possible, I sometimes hate the attention and feeling like I have to be "in the zone" all the time. Sometimes I just want to walk to the coffee shop and not have to give off a commanding presence/charismatic aura in public, it's exhausting. But it seems like everyone I pass expects me to
It’s the same people at my train station every day, and some days I just don’t want to be “in the zone” all the time.
It's sort of exhausting when you dress well and everyone in public is trying to size you up 24/7. How do you guys deal with this? Is it just a mind state thing? Genuinely curious if similar situations happen to you guys and how you deal with it on a day to day basis
Never Happened.
The soy is strong with this one.
Let me guess, you paid 2000 pounds for the suit and prefer to wear it with handstitched oxfords?
I mentioned Suit Supply, not to flex, mainly just to emphasize that I didn't spend much on my suits for the value they give
The question is how young analysts deal with other males sizing them up when in public constantly
It helps not being a beta soyboy.
I would have guessed OP is mentally challenged, but I guess that's a fair assumption.
yeah well that's a shit story. but there is a guy in a hotrod pickup doing burnouts in my alley and i just called the police on him. ive sorta become who i hate. but you're a piece of shit too i bet ![https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/51pJPs1sMHL._SX320_BO1…] [https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/51pJPs1sMHL._SX320_BO1… https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/51pJPs1sMHL._SX320_BO1…
Burnouts? I don't even bother to call in gunshots anymore. Did the police actually show up?
Yeah dude I moved to the suburbs they better show up. Where do you live there are gunshots at?
If you are outdoors, wear sunglasses If you are indoor, just be comfortable with wearing nicer clothes. If someone makes a mean comment, standard response: "Sure"
Yeah, that's a good idea for when I'm walking down the street.
It also happens indoors at cafes and grocery stores too where I'm just minding my business in line and such, guess I'll just have to live with it
I ride the train sometimes, I can confirm this is a thing. Let them have their win, it's petty. At the end of the day they are the ones that have to live with whatever makes them stare down someone in a suit.
I've never once had any issues. Are you just one of those guys that looks condescending and then a suit makes it even worse? Like the male version of RBF.
I don't think so, I'm pretty neutral/friendly looking.
It's more to do with my age, I look like I'm 21 years old. And older males see me and realize I'm an investment banker, earning a certain amount more than them that ticks them off, and they get mad and try to "one up" me in a staredown.
Never happens when I'm not dressed formally
Edit: I think I'm gonna take the advice given here such as wearing sunglasses when I'm tired/don't want to deal with passive aggressive confrontation. Still open to more suggestions
Reading your responses makes me think that it's your giant ego and condescending attitude that people don't like.
Lol no one automatically assumes you're an investment banker, much less that you earn a "certain amount more than them."
I am 100% certain this is entirely in your head.
https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/narcissistic%20personality%2…
underrated
Lolololol
13 replies later this thread is still hilarious and my reply is still the best by far
OP:
https://media0.giphy.com/media/3oEjHO6kED0gWOSpCU/giphy-downsized.gif" alt="you talking to me" />
Also OP, as for the whole 'alpha bravo' stuff, it's actually alpha beta
And OP, don't feel bad about being beta. There need to be some betas out there for us alphas to exist, otherwise we'd all just be the same
OP, Why would you even make and hold eye contact with people anyway? I personally never make and hold eye contact as don’t 99% of people around me, as far as I can observe occasionally. They have their eyes either on their phones or on non-human outside environment most of the time, when not socialising / interacting for a purpose (asking for help/directions etc). In the free world, this is also known as “minding your own business”.
Unless you’re a pick up dude, a street salesman or just generally someone who “wants something” from others, you shouldn’t even normally be making eye contact, let alone holding it for more than a split second when eyes meet randomly.
You just sound insanely insecure. People have literally no time in their lives to do this. You're 100% imagining this.
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This is quite literally the dumbest post I have ever read on WSO.
Do what any normal person does and just look at your phone whilst walking
Who cares? I can't believe you wrote all that, when you can just ignore them.
Maybe they think you look a bit off/ strange, so they stare. Then when you break their glance they smile in disbelief at what a strange looking dude they just saw.
What kind of insecure ass shit is this? Get off the internet.
You're fucking delusional if you think people care about you that much. You're not the only guy in the city wearing a suit.
If people do hate you, it's because you probably act and talk the same way you type on here.
Literally reminds me of those Virgin vs Chad memes.
"The virgin suit supply wearer vs the Chad commuter"
Have you ruled out the metro look you're flaunting is catching the attention of gays?
Yo GoldenCinderblock tell him about the time you had a gangbang with that dude on the train who was wearing a $400 suit.
There literally are people vouching for me that this type of thing does happen. I was only asking for advice
God, this community is so toxic
No its not haha this thread was dumb. Just ignore them. Why do you really care if someone stares you down cus youre wearing some fucking suit?
Also, nobody looking at you can tell you're a banker or whatever. So many professions wear a suit. This is a ridiculous notion. If you're so worried just stare back. What are they gonna do? Fight you? Yeah right.
OP probably grew up in the hood where people with suits where seen as people with money. Since op probably has money he now thinks he will get mugged because of him wearing a suit on hating on him for being rich.
Why not just smile and wave?... or better yet, look at your phone and don't hold eye contact if it bothers you. I don't think most people really care at all that you are wearing a suit and if anything, maybe they are just are curious why someone so young looks so formal. I doubt they assume you are in any specific industry, but maybe they are curious which makes for more stares/looks. Either way, you don't have to be "on"...just look at your phone inside, or smile more. Smiling has a lot of benefits.
An immediate challenge to fight to the death is the only reasonable solution.
the fact that you care is the only problem
I've never thought about someone else's opinion on the way I dress. Why even make eye contact with people in public anyway? Just stare out into the distance or at the ground or at your phone.
I've noticed that's a very American thing to do in my travels (no offense, I'm American), in terms of acknowledging others' existences whether through eye contact or making small talk with strangers. Just straight up doesn't happen elsewhere whether in London or Tokyo. In China / India that's how you get street vendors and beggars all up in your shit. You learn to ignore people who are literally yelling at you for your attention.
I've experience directly hostile behavior towards me 5 times. It's always been the same white trash type of guys that either deliberately bump into me, and saying shit like "fucking suits","nice suit faggot", ,etc.", or mutter similar comments, but nothing physical.
Sometimes, when I've gone directly to a party after work, I've gotten the occasional comments on why I wear a suit, and some wildly incorrect assumptions about my political standpoint.
But 99% of the time, it's just compliments.
When normal folk see some guy in a nicely tailored suit, some will unfortunately assume that you're a yuppie douchebag.
this board is great for seeking insight on high finance careers, and I look forward to meeting the intelligent posters in the office one day. I also look forward to meeting people like the OP cuz I need to laugh if ima be working a million hours a week lol
Yeah that’s definitely all in your head - It’s called delusion
sunglasses bro
Wear a hat and sunglasses or just leave the suit in the office
“Mean mugging”. Is this for real? As opposed to what, “nice mugging”?
The OP is painful.
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