The Illusion of A Better Job

Why do we constantly set ourselves up for disappointment by dreaming up the possibilities how much better our lives would be if only we were doing something else?

Too many times I have heard friends say "things would be so much better if only I worked for x group in y bank". Or another thing you might hear, "I like what I am doing now, but I think a job at fund z would pay a lot more".

If there are any monkeys out there with this mentality, please keep this old cliche in mind: the grass is always greener on the other side.

The reason I am ranting on this topic today is because this past week I have been interviewing candidates for a job. In several of the interviews, the candidate will say something along the lines of: "I like what I am doing now, but the position x is something I have always seen myself doing and would enjoy more."

But allow me to interject. If you have never done the said position or worked for the said company, how do you really know that you would be happy switching jobs? And if you are genuinely happy where you are now, then why change?

Edit: As pointed out in the comments, this is still the best "safe" answer to give in an interview; however, everyone should think about this question critically outside of the interview to determine the answer's validity on a personal level.

Now, I understand changing jobs for career advancement or fulfilling some goal (like attending a top B-school), but at some point we need to be honest with ourselves and ask the questions: Am I happy now? If yes, then how do I stay happy? If no, then how do I realistically achieve happiness (i.e. what drives happiness money, family, ect.)?

Finance is the kind of place where you can bust your ass working towards things you thought you wanted, but when you get those things you realize that you are no more happier than you were when you started. To take a cue from the book "Monkeys Business", I don't think anyone wants to end up like that managing director who masturbates to porn in his office at night.

I have too been guilty of the "better job illusion". However, reassessing my goals and happiness actually motivated me to stop playing by other people's rules and become an entrepreneur (although not yet a full time one, but hopefully soon).

For those of you who are SAs or just starting out, work really hard, but don't do so blindly. Really try to figure out what is driving your happiness. Take the wisdom from professor Malhotra and learn how to take control of your career and live happily.

 
Best Response
PuppyBackedSecurities:
I think you are being overdramatic

even in your example Monkey Business, all the guys got solid buyside gigs they prefer to their dlj experience but in the same light they would not have gotten these without said experience

most of the time when people move to a new job, they enjoy it more

The post may be a little over the top; however, the over arching point is that all too often, people make the career decisions that they are told they are supposed to make rather than make the ones that are truly right for them. A lot of people "chase the dream" simply to realize it was just a dream.

The point is to try to be happy with whatever stage of your career or life you are at. I am not saying that you should not chase "better jobs" or not try to move up in your career.

WSO Writer | View my blog
 
anaxi:
The post may be a little over the top; however, the over arching point is that all too often, people make the career decisions that they are told they are supposed to make rather than make the ones that are truly right for them. A lot of people "chase the dream" simply to realize it was just a dream.

The point is to try to be happy with whatever stage of your career or life you are at. I am not saying that you should not chase "better jobs" or not try to move up in your career.

I don't really understand. It's actually impossible to make decisions independently of influence from friends, family, society, etc. especially when it comes to one's career choice. No such thing as an independent decision exists, though some people listen more to what people have to say than do others.

I don't think anyone will disagree with you that the point is to try to be happy whenever you can be. Being happy is obviously optimal compared with being frustrated, sad, etc. But there's also not really some normative state of "happiness". Totally different for different folks.

 

Also in terms of the interview question, what else is a candidate supposed to say? That they hate their current job and they can't wait to get out? Or they love their current job so much that they don't want to leave? I think that answer is the safest and only "correct" one. Realistically, no one really knows how much they'll like a job before they actually start it, including all these eager students perfecting their resumes for a stint in IB/S&T. You can make an educated guess at best, and hope it works out.

 
bob_bsd:
Also in terms of the interview question, what else is a candidate supposed to say? That they hate their current job and they can't wait to get out? Or they love their current job so much that they don't want to leave? I think that answer is the safest and only "correct" one. Realistically, no one really knows how much they'll like a job before they actually start it, including all these eager students perfecting their resumes for a stint in IB/S&T. You can make an educated guess at best, and hope it works out.

bob, I agree with you. It is the right "safe answer" during an interview. I will edit and make a note in the post to reflect it. However, outside of the interview, I think everyone should really critically think about how true that is on a personal level.

WSO Writer | View my blog
 

The grass IS always greener.

To stick to one thing and keep doing it in hopes that things might get better is a myth.

In this day and age going from one job to another is the norm.

This is not 1950 where you spend your entire life in one place.

Times are a Changing.

Get with the Program, buddy.

 

If you don't want something else to improve your happiness level, you are either one of the very few who are truly content with their lives, or you have fallen into a deep comatose sense of complacency. The grass is greener on the other side; that's what drives humans to overcome obstacles, to pursue excellence at all levels. I mean I'm 99% confident that I would be a lot happier if I were at a MBA business schools ">M7 mba program right now. It fills me with an insatiable desire to better myself. That's a lot better than being content with where I'm at now.

 

It's difficult for alphamales, because no matter how much you have achieved, you always come across people who have a axhieved more, have higher status etc.

A deal I was recently working on got me thinking: I was on the banking side working for PE. Two of the guys had MBAs from HBS, so undoubtedly "rolemodels" for many bankers. But then there was the guy from the company who had negotiated a USD 60m one-off payment on top of selling his stake for USD 400m. So if the PE guys are real alpha males it would be hard to swallow as well that there is someone so much more successful. And you could spin the story further. The question us at what point you should fell content

 

I have this issue. I am never really happy. 500k per year is my "enough" number (outside NYC). I would be able to afford everything I want and still save plenty.

I don't think I will be happy when I get there. At that level of income, what's the point? Raising that salary further is just like scoring points in a video game.

You could retire early, but I think I would go insane. I had some time off between jobs and I didn't know what to do with myself. I need some sort of routine or purpose. Anything to fill the day.

I am already making more than I ever thought I would. I can be relatively irresponsible and barely feel the financial impact. So why am I so eager to find the next big raise? I am almost sure I will just never be content or happy...I don't think it is in my nature.

 

Idk wtf I want anymore. Everytime I've ever put something on a pedestal, I've gotten it and it's been "empty". You always want what you can't have, and once you get it you don't want it anymore because you've realized that you CAN actually have it. It's the answer to the OP's question. Obviously the "other" job is always better, because it's the one you don't have.

As humans, were programmed to be at our best when we're hunting for our next meal. It's how we're built. That's why when you hit a certain point you just keep going. Because while the "hunt" is technically over at that point, you still need that feeling so you begin to convince yourself you need more. Not because you actually think you need more, but because you need to prolong the hunt. It's why unhappiness is more common amongst rich people, it's why dudes with smoking hot girlfriends cheat on them. Because the happiness comes from the process of hunting, not the attainment of WHAT you were hunting.... idk, maybe that's just me though

GBS
 
GoldmanBallSachs:
Idk wtf I want anymore. Everytime I've ever put something on a pedestal, I've gotten it and it's been "empty". You always want what you can't have, and once you get it you don't want it anymore because you've realized that you CAN actually have it. It's the answer to the OP's question. Obviously the "other" job is always better, because it's the one you don't have.

As humans, were programmed to be at our best when we're hunting for our next meal. It's how we're built. That's why when you hit a certain point you just keep going. Because while the "hunt" is technically over at that point, you still need that feeling so you begin to convince yourself you need more. Not because you actually think you need more, but because you need to prolong the hunt. It's why unhappiness is more common amongst rich people, it's why dudes with smoking hot girlfriends cheat on them. Because the happiness comes from the process of hunting, not the attainment of WHAT you were hunting.... idk, maybe that's just me though

An apt quote on the subject:

“If you don’t get what you want, you suffer; if you get what you don’t want, you suffer; even when you get exactly what you want, you still suffer because you can’t hold on to it forever. Your mind is your predicament. It wants to be free of change, free of pain, free of the obligations of life and death. But change is a law, and no amount of pretending will alter that reality.”

 

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Go East, Young Man

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