Bonus Bananas April 11, 2014

1) Best, Brightest and Rejected: Elite Colleges Turn Away Up to 95% (NY Times) - Target schools just got a little more target, I guess.

2) When the French clock off at 6pm, they really mean it (Guardian) - It is now illegal to answer your boss's email after 6pm in France. Against the law to take work home with you, too. Weekends? Fuhgedaboudit. And yes, this goes for American companies with French subsidiaries too. Is this a great country or what?

3) Swedes to give six-hour workday a go (The Local) - Not to be outdone by the French, the Swedes are set to launch the 30-hour workweek, with full pay. The thinking behind the move is that it will account for fewer sick days. Because there's no need to call in sick when you're never at work anyway.

4) JPMorgan details where it’s hiring 000s. Perfect background for a career in HFT (eFinancial Careers) - Back office is the new front office.

5) Police allege Dutch banker killed wife, daughter before suicide (CNBC) - Jesus, dude, what the fuck?

6) After Pando shows clear evidence of fraud, Indiegogo responds by… deleting anti-fraud guarantee (Pando Daily) - Well that's disappointing.

7) NYU Mining Bitcoin for New Class (Wall Street Journal) - Now you can get your Masters in Bitcoin. Not really, but NYU is offering several classes in the various facets of Bitcoin and other cryptocurrencies this fall.

8) HOW TO SHINE YOUR SHOES LIKE A REAL MAN (D'Marge) - Ummm...hand the guy in the lobby a sawbuck? Now go get your shinebox.

9) Navy rescues family with sick baby from sailboat (Yahoo! News) - I'm an accomplished sailor who has made long passages in small sailboats, but idiots like this never cease to amaze me. What kind of a moron packs up his wife and two infant kids and sets sail around the world on a leaky 36-foot boat?

10) REASONS WHY SAN FRANCISCO IS THE WORST PLACE EVER (VICE) - I grew up there and I barely recognize the place these days. That's not necessarily a bad thing, because there were some seriously sketchy parts of town way back when. It's good to know you can still buy a Drano-laced bindle of meth in the Tenderloin, at least.

Video of the Week:

This is going to be a downer, but it looks very well done. The Bhopal disaster happened when I was in high school, and to this day I can remember being shocked at the scope of the tragedy. At the time the only thing we had to compare it to was Three Mile Island, which hadn't resulted in a single casualty. Bhopal killed thousands within minutes, and thousands more in the weeks and months that followed. Over half a million suffered debilitating injuries as a result of it. There's plenty of blame to go around, ranging from shoddy practices on the part of Union Carbide to maximize profits, all the way to possible employee sabotage, but the end result was a massive and ongoing human tragedy. Martin Sheen is a natural to play Warren Anderson, the Union Carbide CEO who would come to be known as the "Butcher of Bhopal" and who fled India after being charged with murder. It's a tragic story on so many levels, and it really highlights what can happen when you put profits before people. Check it out:

That's it for this week, monkeys. Have a fantastic weekend and let me know what you think of this week's Bananas in the comments!

 

2 Vegas has to have a long term over under for when France goes bankrupt.

Follow the shit your fellow monkeys say @shitWSOsays Life is hard, it's even harder when you're stupid - John Wayne
 
Best Response

The second paragraph in No. 1 really rings true:

"Deluged by more applications than ever, the most selective colleges are, inevitaably, rejecting a vast majority, including legions of students they once would have accepted. Admissions directors at these institutions say that most of the students they turn down are such strong candidates that many are indistinguishable from those who get in."

I attended a target (H/Y/P) for college. I remember senior spring of high school, after admissions decisions were sent out, I went from being the bookish, quiet guy to big man on campus and voted "Most Likely to Succeed." I felt like a rockstar. Honestly, however, I am now mature enough to realize that the whole thing is one big crapshot.

I mentioned this in a previous post, but unless you are absolutely truly outstanding in a certain field (e.g. Gold medalist at the International Math Olympiad, winner of the Siemens Competition, a musician who debuted at Carnegie Hall when they were 10 years old, etc.), getting into one of these top schools is a total crap shoot. Simply having 2300+ SAT and top grades is no longer enough.

As the article also mentions, there are going to be more and more people from overseas applying to these top schools. I wouldn't be surprised if the acceptance rate at my alma mater dropped to 1% by the time my children were applying to college.

 

I actually chose Yale for early decision, but I think I got dinged on my interview when my interviewer wanted me to sing Yale's alma mater for 20 minutes inside a crowded Starbucks and I didn't.

 
Edmundo Braverman:
2) When the French clock off at 6pm, they really mean it (Guardian) - It is now illegal to answer your boss's email after 6pm in France. Against the law to take work home with you, too. Weekends? Fuhgedaboudit. And yes, this goes for American companies with French subsidiaries too. Is this a great country or what?

No, France Did Not Ban Workers From Answering Emails After 6 P.M.

"For all the tribulations in our lives, for all the troubles that remain in the world, the decline of violence is an accomplishment we can savor, and an impetus to cherish the forces of civilization and enlightenment that made it possible."
 
Edmundo Braverman:

8) HOW TO SHINE YOUR SHOES LIKE A REAL MAN (D'Marge) - Ummm...hand the guy in the lobby a sawbuck? Now go get your shinebox.

There is something about polishing shoes that is so relaxing and calming that I try to do it at least once a month. Like cleaning your rifle. Still I prefer spit shining shoes without Leather conditioner, never really had a need for it.

 

2) and 3) - Since I don't do more than 6 quality hours of work a day, and I never like the types of emails I get after 6 or on the weekends, I'm so on board with this. I'm moving to Europe. Asia and possibly 'Merica can pick up the slack.

1) Which is why I'm not steering my kids to take 5 fucking courses down at the local juco and do extracurriculars in stuff they don't like just to join the rat race a few years early. Teach them to work hard but also, you know, have some perspective and be young.

5) I will never, never understand the cowardice that causes murder-suicide. You did it in the wrong order buddy, take yourself first.

 
Scott Irish:

1) Which is why I'm not steering my kids to take 5 fucking courses down at the local juco and do extracurriculars in stuff they don't like just to join the rat race a few years early. Teach them to work hard but also, you know, have some perspective and be young.

Despite whatever the admissions rates say the "rat race" only applies for like 5 schools, which are crapshoots anyway. The rest of them are not THAT hard to get into if you "work hard"
 

So you guys figured out headlines are provocative and you have to read the story to get the context? Nice work. It probably took Buzzfeed and Business Insider to teach you that, but it's been like that since the printing press was invented.

 
ke18sb:

I think those parents should face the legal consequences of child endangerment/neglect. Also, I'd hope they are required to pay for that rescue. Does anyone know the policy on that?

The government, of course, is able to pursue civil and criminal charges against the parents in the court of law.

"For all the tribulations in our lives, for all the troubles that remain in the world, the decline of violence is an accomplishment we can savor, and an impetus to cherish the forces of civilization and enlightenment that made it possible."
 

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