Morning Monkeys,
I've been reading this site for a while now, trying to figure out exactly what it is I'd like to do in finance going forward, and it has been extremely helpful.
A big "thank you" to all of you who have inadvertently helped me along the way. A great piece of advise I stumbled upon is that if you'd like to transition into ER, it's probably beneficial to start following a stock and write your own report. I've taken this advise to heart and I've written my own, probably awful, ER report. But, having you go all Grey Gorillas from Congo on it is for a later post (1995 movie reference... as you can tell, I'm well out of college.) Instead, I think it'd be a lot more fun to hear about the most hilarious things you've seen in an ER report, or equally interesting, the most hilarious faux pas you've seen from amateurs like me (or perhaps yourself at a younger age.) These could include, but obviously aren't limited to:
1) Puns (Found this on WSO - http://i.imgur.com/cucUJ.jpg - awesome.) 2) Target prices that are just ridiculous. 3) Oddly sexual adjectives (i.e. "bulbous earnings in the coming quarter" or "the company is really banging out revenues this quarter", etc.) 4) Just hilariously wrong advise, a la Jim Cramer's Bear Sterns opinion in early March 2008.
Hopefully you will all find this fun and interesting, and it'll help me make sure I'm not doing anything tremendously stupid prior to asking you to take a look at my work product. Again, thanks to everyone for wasting time on the internet answering finance questions instead of watching youtube videos.
Analysts pride themselves on their retarded puns and I'm gonna be honest, I love them. Ridiculous target prices are awful but usually come from the same few firms ("we reached our price target for FB by applying a 7932x P/E and 279x EBIT multiple to create a blended average price target of $70.") but there's nothing too faux pas about them, just stupidity.
So true on the sexual adjectives, I recall seeing "tantalizing revenue growth" on multiple occasions but would love to see someone bang out revenues, haha
Thanks! I had no idea of the importance of "don't be ridiculously boring" in an ER report. I currently work in actuarial (in an audit function) and having a dry and boring report is encouraged for whatever reason.
So, prior to allowing the veterans to completely shred my first try at an ER report, I think I'll need to include:
1) Catchy Title 2) 2-7 Puns 3) Subtly sexual reference to ROE or Sales ("Return on Sexy Equity"? "ROSE"? Eh, that's dumb, I'll play around with it 4) 1 reference to Mark Zuckerburg getting into a fight
I think if I can skillfully incorporate all of that, my daring assumptions and overly agressive price target will be treated with kid gloves...Hmmm, maybe I'll shoot for just #1.
I'll post my first try at an ER report soon, I hope you all have a chance to take a look at it, as I welcome any and all criticism, constructive or otherwise (....I'll probably regret that statement later.)
Thanks again!
'Zuck getting smashed by Thiel' was dropped on msnbc the other day, almost spit coffee on myself at that one
Most of the of the web 2.0 "stories" have been wrong so far like Zynga reports. One report was saying how those slot and poker apps had much stronger traction than other type of apps due to ppl's gambling tendencies. But if anyone ever even dled those apps its because they offer chips daily so ppl like me just log in just to collect them and not play.
I love funny titles on ER reports. Research is usually pretty dry, so a little levity is appreciated.
this is the best i've seen:
http://static6.businessinsider.com/image/4f9fc982ecad04484a000010-900/t…
Look up the Satly Snack Report. A guy wrote a report on PepsiCo with 6 pages dedicated to the salty snack market in Argentina. Sometimes you become so granular that you miss the big picture.
OP - I take credit for #1
Who did the report? Having a hard time finding it via ThomsonThis title is puny and sexual at the same time.
http://wealthmanagement.com/site-files/wealthmanagement.com/files/archi…
[quote=bearing]This title is puny and sexual at the same time.
http://wealthmanagement.com/site-files/wealthmanagement.com/files/archi…]
LOL
[quote=bearing]This title is puny and sexual at the same time.
http://wealthmanagement.com/site-files/wealthmanagement.com/files/archi…]
hahhaha
Saw a report somewhere that said "RIM: Jobs says 7in is enough"
Just can't remember where though, might not have even been an ER report but maybe a consumer report
I don't know whether you mean this one but your post definitely reminded me of the below article:
http://cdn.crackberry.com/sites/crackberry.com/files/u10880/6k-rim-jobs…
ER is a fucking joke.
http://www.tomsguide.com/us/Jim-Balsillie-RIM-App-Store-Distortion-Fiel…
[quote=BlackHat]http://www.tomsguide.com/us/Jim-Balsillie-RIM-App-Store-Distortion-Fiel…]
Trolololololol
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