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Have you guys seen yourselves becoming consumed in finance?

What I mean is...for the past few months (and by extension, the past few years of prepping for an SA position) I've surrounded myself with so much finance and market related information it's hard to imagine what life was like before. In my case specifically, limiting going out and trying to surround myself with people that were also finance orientated.

There was a thread on WSO about women dating finance guys, and the fact that they could only talk about finance. I thought that was silly at first, until I realized I was probably one of those guys. I mean I'm thankful for my situation, and my "exit ops" seem promising, but it has probably taken a toll on my normal social skills. But you gotta be a little crazy to become successful right?

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Comments (23)

  • SECfinance's picture

    Everyone in finance has a personality flaw of some sort. Whether it's watching CNBC/Bloomberg like a teenager watches SportsCenter, spending extra time at the office to get ahead and become more knowledgeable (referring to AM specifically here), or simply trading your free time away while you're younger to have a better chance of success in the long run, everyone is a little "off" in my opinion. You have to be in order to survive.

    That being said, I understand how you feel. I transferred straight into my school's business program, so I don't know many people here who don't have an interest in finance/business in general. I've definitely caught myself talking about finance/internships with my friends, but I don't really mind. It's internship season and everyone's excited to hear about who got a great gig, or what the other person is doing this summer.

    Talking to girls about finance on the other hand... Ehh. You should be able to have something else to talk about there. I could date a finance girl, but not a banker.

  • UFOinsider's picture

    Yes, I went into this because I WANTED it to take over for a while. It was this or the military. I was looking to change myself for the better and then walk away at some point a little wiser and a little richer.

    I do, however, kinda feel bad for the people that stay here forever. It's a half life, and everything revolves around making money. It's good for a while, but if I'm 40 and still chasing paper at the expense of everything else, I'd probably shoot myself.

    Get busy living

  • In reply to UFOinsider
    porsche959's picture

    UFOinsider:
    Yes, I went into this because I WANTED it to take over for a while. It was this or the military. I was looking to change myself for the better and then walk away at some point a little wiser and a little richer.

    I do, however, kinda feel bad for the people that stay here forever. It's a half life, and everything revolves around making money. It's good for a while, but if I'm 40 and still chasing paper at the expense of everything else, I'd probably shoot myself.

    I had a very similar idea as well. I thought wanted the finance craziness to take over for a while...but do you think it starts taking a substantial toll on you? Meaning, once I got set on finance, my social life, and even some friendships took a backseat to my career goals. Eventually, you lose those friendships and finance becomes an even bigger part of your life.

  • In reply to porsche959
    UFOinsider's picture

    porsche959:
    UFOinsider:
    Yes, I went into this because I WANTED it to take over for a while. It was this or the military. I was looking to change myself for the better and then walk away at some point a little wiser and a little richer.

    I do, however, kinda feel bad for the people that stay here forever. It's a half life, and everything revolves around making money. It's good for a while, but if I'm 40 and still chasing paper at the expense of everything else, I'd probably shoot myself.

    I had a very similar idea as well. I thought wanted the finance craziness to take over for a while...but do you think it starts taking a substantial toll on you? Meaning, once I got set on finance, my social life, and even some friendships took a backseat to my career goals. Eventually, you lose those friendships and finance becomes an even bigger part of your life.


    Part of this is just growing up....it's not as much fun all the time, that's life. It's really up to you to decide if you're comfortable with it, and how far you'll take it. I don't know what space you're in, but for the most part the first two/three years just suck and then it starts to get better.

    Get busy living

  • Relinquis's picture

    You have to balance out your life... not only will it help you become more successful, but will also give you more fulfilment.

    Areas to focus on:
    - Family: This is key. Family first. Sort out any issues you have with relatives and make sure you keep in touch & visit on the holidays.
    - Friends: Make sure you have enough non-finance friends to keep you grounded and keep perspective. This will help you maintain a grip on reality.
    - Personal life: Date, or have a relationship. Don't wait until you are ready, or make enough money to get to know that girl/guy that you like.
    - Volunteer / Charity / Give back: This will keep you grounded and will do wonders for your self esteem.
    - Career: Make sure you develop your career, credentials, network, etc.. don't let your "job" get in the way of developing your business skills, marketability and ability to make money.

    Don't give me BS about how you don't have any time. It takes 30 minutes to call 4 relatives or friends to say hi. A 1 hour coffee is a decent 1st date, etc...

    Also, realise that finance is a tool to give you options... options in your career, options to pursue other interests, options to travel, to retire earlier, etc... don't get into the trap of not setting your own "real goals" and replacing them with corporate / advertising ones.... e.g. try to progress in the corporate ladder just because it is expected even though there are other paths that might be better, or spending all of your bonus on fast cars you don't know how to drive, holidays to places you don't like to spend time with people you don't care about.... Monaco sucks when you're surrounded by gold diggers, prostitutes and middle aged men... you're better off at Hunter Mountain with your buddies or a long weekend break to South American with the nerdy girl you like.

    Bonus: The next time you're sitting next to a CEO at a conference and you're discussing your non-work lives, you'll have more insight to share than which Nobu is the best one...

  • In reply to Relinquis
    UFOinsider's picture

    Really good advice above, take it seriously or you will end up in an apartment alone and depressed every Saturday night after the first few months of partying hardcore every weekend.

    Relinquis:
    - Personal life: Date, or have a relationship. Don't wait until you are ready, or make enough money to get to know that girl/guy that you like.

    ^^ YESSSSS! Keep it simple, stupid [KISS]

    Everyone is busy, so just be real. If you want to chase tail, chase tail, but real dating is pretty simple: "Hi, I LIKE YOU, let's hang out." Put work first, do what you gotta do, and hopefully you walk away from the hustle with more than money.

    Get busy living

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  • Kuggi2011's picture

    I have known some girls in my office since my internship.
    My first impression was that they were hot..

    But now they are not hot anymore after three months.

  • In reply to Relinquis
    juniormistmaker's picture

    Relinquis:
    You have to balance out your life... not only will it help you become more successful, but will also give you more fulfilment.

    Areas to focus on:
    - Family: This is key. Family first. Sort out any issues you have with relatives and make sure you keep in touch & visit on the holidays.
    - Friends: Make sure you have enough non-finance friends to keep you grounded and keep perspective. This will help you maintain a grip on reality.
    - Personal life: Date, or have a relationship. Don't wait until you are ready, or make enough money to get to know that girl/guy that you like.
    - Volunteer / Charity / Give back: This will keep you grounded and will do wonders for your self esteem.
    - Career: Make sure you develop your career, credentials, network, etc.. don't let your "job" get in the way of developing your business skills, marketability and ability to make money.

    Don't give me BS about how you don't have any time. It takes 30 minutes to call 4 relatives or friends to say hi. A 1 hour coffee is a decent 1st date, etc...

    Also, realise that finance is a tool to give you options... options in your career, options to pursue other interests, options to travel, to retire earlier, etc... don't get into the trap of not setting your own "real goals" and replacing them with corporate / advertising ones.... e.g. try to progress in the corporate ladder just because it is expected even though there are other paths that might be better, or spending all of your bonus on fast cars you don't know how to drive, holidays to places you don't like to spend time with people you don't care about.... Monaco sucks when you're surrounded by gold diggers, prostitutes and middle aged men... you're better off at Hunter Mountain with your buddies or a long weekend break to South American with the nerdy girl you like.

    Bonus: The next time you're sitting next to a CEO at a conference and you're discussing your non-work lives, you'll have more insight to share than which Nobu is the best one...

    Excellently said.

  • M Friedman's picture

    I feel like this needs to be written about on the front page. I think I am going to gather all the comments on previous, related posts and post it soon.

    (Seriously, one of my biggest fears). I already feel it happening. I sometimes catch myself from talking too much about current events, financial careers, and making money.

  • eriginal's picture

    I can see this becoming a huge problem. I got my offer, now I'm trying to relax before I start and I can't stop... seriously. I get anxious when I'm not doing something productive to further my career. I told myself I would party and live up my last semester in college but now that I have the time I'm not doing it, I just keep working on my GMAT, my club, and my non-profit.

    I need to take a break from WSO until August, this thread scares me.

    "One man with courage makes a majority." — Andrew Jackson

  • Pike's picture

    UFOinsider...great advice I really appreciate that. I think that all of us have to remember from time to time that though we may think we do....we all don't have it all figured out.

    XX

  • Bondarb's picture

    If you dont like your job enough for it to become permanently a large part of your life then i suggest finding a new job as soon as possible. This whole notion of "i'll do this till I'm 40" is not realistic...most people are not going ot have enough money or time to switch careers at 40. At 40 you likely will have kids and be locked into the job that you hated 20 years ago...when you're young is when you have the flexibility to switch careers not when your 40.

  • In reply to Bondarb
    porsche959's picture

    Bondarb:
    If you dont like your job enough for it to become permanently a large part of your life then i suggest finding a new job as soon as possible. This whole notion of "i'll do this till I'm 40" is not realistic...most people are not going ot have enough money or time to switch careers at 40. At 40 you likely will have kids and be locked into the job that you hated 20 years ago...when you're young is when you have the flexibility to switch careers not when your 40.

    I don't think its about disliking your job. I think it has to do with becoming a more rounded and complete individual. From WSO I would gather that "the Goldman Sachs" is god and anything else below is pretty much worthless. Outside of the WSO prestige bubble, very few people have heard of the top firms us monkeys drool over. Not that there's anything wrong with that..it's a great motivator and has gotten me where I am today. But I think it does take a toll on our social life. I.E. what the guy said above, always trying to be productive and trying to surround yourself with equally driven individuals.

  • RagnarDanneskjold's picture

    I second both Relinquis and Bondarb. To all the students here - your perspective changes after a few years in the field, trust me.

  • In reply to eriginal
    Hoogerman's picture

    eriginal:
    I can see this becoming a huge problem. I got my offer, now I'm trying to relax before I start and I can't stop... seriously. I get anxious when I'm not doing something productive to further my career. I told myself I would party and live up my last semester in college but now that I have the time I'm not doing it, I just keep working on my GMAT, my club, and my non-profit.

    I need to take a break from WSO until August, this thread scares me.

    so much truth. I have been consumed with "what is the next thing I can achieve" that I actually the past few weeks I have purposely not visited this website.

    I had a breakdown in the library when prepping for interviews, and I was like...yeah I need a break lol

    I banana back

  • In reply to Relinquis
    U Accrete Me's picture

    Relinquis:
    You have to balance out your life... not only will it help you become more successful, but will also give you more fulfilment.

    Areas to focus on:
    - Family: This is key. Family first. Sort out any issues you have with relatives and make sure you keep in touch & visit on the holidays.
    - Friends: Make sure you have enough non-finance friends to keep you grounded and keep perspective. This will help you maintain a grip on reality.
    - Personal life: Date, or have a relationship. Don't wait until you are ready, or make enough money to get to know that girl/guy that you like.
    - Volunteer / Charity / Give back: This will keep you grounded and will do wonders for your self esteem.
    - Career: Make sure you develop your career, credentials, network, etc.. don't let your "job" get in the way of developing your business skills, marketability and ability to make money.

    Don't give me BS about how you don't have any time. It takes 30 minutes to call 4 relatives or friends to say hi. A 1 hour coffee is a decent 1st date, etc...

    Also, realise that finance is a tool to give you options... options in your career, options to pursue other interests, options to travel, to retire earlier, etc... don't get into the trap of not setting your own "real goals" and replacing them with corporate / advertising ones.... e.g. try to progress in the corporate ladder just because it is expected even though there are other paths that might be better, or spending all of your bonus on fast cars you don't know how to drive, holidays to places you don't like to spend time with people you don't care about.... Monaco sucks when you're surrounded by gold diggers, prostitutes and middle aged men... you're better off at Hunter Mountain with your buddies or a long weekend break to South American with the nerdy girl you like.

    Bonus: The next time you're sitting next to a CEO at a conference and you're discussing your non-work lives, you'll have more insight to share than which Nobu is the best one...

    LOVE!!!!!! I needed that

  • wallstreetballa's picture

    Amazing Thread !!! and way to lay down the law Relinquis

    I suggest a couple day break from wso to everyone as well lol because I know all ya'll are addicted deep down

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  • kmess024's picture

    The Four E's of investment
    "The greatest Enemies of the Equity investor are Expenses and Emotions."- Warren Buffet