what do you monkeys think of this cover letter?
(Senior Monkey, 85
Points)
on 12/17/12 at 5:53am
hi,
what do you monkeys think of this cover letter? thank
//// I have posted my new Cover Letter in my comment below /////






totally redo. honestly.
totally redo. honestly.
I'ma be straight with you:
I'ma be straight with you: this is a terrible cover letter.
I thought the letter was
I thought the letter was going in a totally different direction then it did
I help people with the tough situation of not knowing how to respond to emails.
stopped reading after
stopped reading after this:
As I had always been fascinated by finance—and especially financial modeling—I soon discovered that a bank would be a suitable working environment for me by doing a quick foray into banking in Summer 2009, doing a Summer Program at the NYSE.
start over. be (significantly) more concise. find an english major or someone in your career services department to proofread it after your first draft as there are glaring grammar and business writing errors in what you posted. avoid cliches and hyperbole. if you go to mergers and inquisitions they have a good template to start from.
Look up cover letter
Look up cover letter templates online to give you and idea has to what the content of the letter should look like. What ever you do, don't send this one.
Go to Marcus' post in the
Go to Marcus' post in the Investment Banking forum. It was recently brought back. Read his portion on cover letters and do exactly that. He mentions the three parts you want to have.
Do not send this. Interest in financial modeling-is that a fucking joke? No one in banking will be impressed by your fascination in using Excel shortcuts to feel smart.
xxx
xxx