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Everyone has the story about one kid asking a stupid question, and everyone coughing "asshole." But do you have any truly embarrassing OCR stories? Share them.

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Comments (35)

  • Clarkey's picture

    At OCR events this year I see the same douchebag every single time. He thinks he's some slick Saudi dude who has a given right to smash IBD. He pulls up right outside the location that events take place at and parks his Jag illegally, which fucks things up for buses who need to get past.

    This fucking slimeball then slithers out of his car wearing shoes that look like slippers with his initials embroidered on the front. He wears this suit which actually looks alright, but then he wears this disgusting cravat.

    Recently, three tiny Chinese chicks were chatting to a BB MD when he comes over and overrides them. He reaches out to introduce himself to the MD, but before he can get his words out the MD says, "what the fuck are you doing?".

    He then slithers off leaving a trail of grease everyewhere.

  • CharmWithSubstance's picture

    These 3 girls talked to no one during the recruiting event - never left the food table and never stopped eating. Worst part? They each took out a ZIPLOC bag at the end and started taking the food home! I was appalled.

  • happypantsmcgee's picture

    How about telling a guy from a fixed income desk, 'i guess everyone can't do equities, huh?' response: get away from me

    If I had asked people what they wanted, they would have said faster horses - Henry Ford

  • acs_london's picture

    At the Banking and Financial Services Fair at LSE, the following conversation took place:

    Rothschild Representative (RR): What interests you about financial services?
    Student: I want to be a trader at Rothschild
    RR: Ummm.. We don't do that. We're purely into corporate finance advisory
    Student: Ohh.. I want to be an investment banker
    RR: Really?
    Student: Yeah, really. Can I have one of those Rothschild pens now?

  • Kanon's picture

    A few, but pretty generic...

    #1
    Kid: So... what kind of companies are you doing deals for right now?
    BB VP: (are you for real look on his face) "That's... confidential"

    #2
    About 5-6 students have formed a semi-circle around one banker and are taking turns asking questions. One guy pushes his way through and starts asking questions... then just stands there awkwardly in the middle of the group for the rest of the time

    #3
    Someone asked a derivatives trader whether you needed to know calculus to be a derivs trader

    Clarkey - did you ever find out what happened to that douchebag? Haha... initialed shoes...

  • manbearpig's picture

    I saw a guy sneeze on a partner once. He claimed he was allergic to cologne.

    -MBP

  • JimmyDormandy's picture

    Theres are priceless - keep them coming. Clarkey - did the initialed shoe moron end up in "equities in Dallas?"

    "Jesus, he's like a gremlin; comes with instructions and shit"

  • Nouveau Richie's picture

    A BB, IBD MD places a small stack of business cards on the table as he heads out of the room. With much fewer cards than there were students, a bunch of kids run up to grab one. One asshole grabs three and sells the other two for $5 each on the spot. The club board members see it happen and ask the kid WTF he was doing. The kid responds like a nonchalant douche and refuses to give the others their money back. The club president goes to walk the MD out to his car and quickly asks for the club resume book (that he gave the MD before the presentation) back. He opens to the the asshole's resume, tears it straight out of the hard-cover bound book, smiles at the MD without giving an explanation, and says "thanks again for coming!"

  • Art Vandelay's picture

    last fall, a friend of mine was at a BB networking event. clearly not jazzed about being at his third schmoozer of the week, he heads straight for a group of his buddies who are chatting near the open bar. he grabs two glasses of wine, pounds the first, asks "how many dicks do you think we're going to need to suck before we can get out of here?", then pounds the second. his buddies stand there in silence while he excuses himself to grab another drink. when he gets back, he notices a tiny woman in a name tag emerge from the middle of the group. she extends her hand to him and introduces herself as head of interest rate products.

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  • wolfy's picture

    GS breakout session with 6 people and me. It's 2 quiet Asian girls, me, GS chief of staff, his associate, and 2 dudes. "So what do you guys want to know?" Silence. I wait for someone to say something; eventually we get a conversation going about recruiting and the Rolling Stones article. Basically it hurt the employees personally, talked about LB's voicemails, etc. Suddenly guy next to me asks, "So, how much do you pay?"

    VP looks at associate in a "did he not get a free Wetfeet guide," caught off guard look. 5 seconds of silence later, they force out a number. "Yeah, that's it... that'll make sure you can eat in NYC."

    2 minutes later, the 2nd guy starts talking about saving the environment for 10 minutes, his environmentalist group that he heads, etc. etc. I thought we were going to bring up Hank Paulson and owls.

    The two Asian girls never said a thing.

    But I got 1 hour one on one with the very nice VP who helped me later. (He's getting a Christmas card).

  • JimmyDormandy's picture

    I can delete - what posts are you referring to?

    "Jesus, he's like a gremlin; comes with instructions and shit"

  • wolfy's picture

    From April's post to ours, thanks Jimmy.

  • IamObama's picture

    At a credit suisse event, this kid comes in, in casual clothes, grabs the pizza and sits down. As the people are speaking, he gets up, grabs some more pizza and sits down. As the networking session is going on, he is standing by the pizza boxes and munching down. Once he is done, he disappears and not to be seen again. I head one of the MD say "who ever eats isn't allowed to leave early".

    Not that big deal but everyone noticed him just eating and not talking to anyone else

  • April-lz's picture

    To Getgo,

    I have no idea who you are talking about. I guess you mistake me for someone else.

    Break Through

  • In reply to wolfy
    JimmyDormandy's picture

    wolfy:
    From April's post to ours, thanks Jimmy.

    No problem

    "Jesus, he's like a gremlin; comes with instructions and shit"

  • In reply to acs_london
    rainman89's picture

    To be fair, those Rothschild pens are quite nice.

    acs_london:
    At the Banking and Financial Services Fair at LSE, the following conversation took place:

    Rothschild Representative (RR): What interests you about financial services?
    Student: I want to be a trader at Rothschild
    RR: Ummm.. We don't do that. We're purely into corporate finance advisory
    Student: Ohh.. I want to be an investment banker
    RR: Really?
    Student: Yeah, really. Can I have one of those Rothschild pens now?

  • Buyside CFA's picture

    OP:

    Do your friends realize how pathetic they are? They go to recruiting events for fun. Not to network. Not to get a job. For fun. That is a tell tale sign that your fiends aren't getting any pussy. The most boring events in the world actually seem fun.

  • wolfy's picture

    They already had offers lined up as top-targets. Not me though (so that's what I was there for). I liked it a lot though, like being on the other side of the looking glass. Just a humorous story Buyside.

  • Buyside CFA's picture

    Sorry man - it's just a sore spot. I actually logged back in to delete my post, which was unnecessary.

    I have attended those events in need of a job. I hate them and always feel awkward. Everyone does. Mocking people at such an event is kind of like going to an unemployment office just to make fun of people.

  • In reply to Buyside CFA
    Nouveau Richie's picture

    Buyside <a href=https://www.e-junkie.com/ecom/gb.php?ii=1145861&amp;c=cart&amp;aff=44880&amp;ejc=2&amp;cl=175031 rel=nofollow>CFA</a>:
    Mocking people at such an event is kind of like going to an unemployment office just to make fun of people.

    So you mean to say it's a fun thing to do?

    (jk)

  • In reply to Buyside CFA
    wolfy's picture

    Buyside <a href=https://www.e-junkie.com/ecom/gb.php?ii=1145861&amp;c=cart&amp;aff=44880&amp;ejc=2&amp;cl=175031 rel=nofollow>CFA</a>:
    Sorry man - it's just a sore spot. I actually logged back in to delete my post, which was unnecessary.

    I have attended those events in need of a job. I hate them and always feel awkward. Everyone does. Mocking people at such an event is kind of like going to an unemployment office just to make fun of people.

    I know exactly the feeling. I just listened (what else can you do?), because this was HBS's event and pretty serious. In my job hunt, that was actually my most lighthearted moment. And I needed that break.

  • In reply to Kanon
    Clarkey's picture

    Kanon:
    A few, but pretty generic...

    Clarkey - did you ever find out what happened to that douchebag? Haha... initialed shoes...

    I haven't seen him in a while. Someone must have complained about him though.

  • repnation's picture

    I've never gone to a networking event for an open bar, but I have been to a lot of MBA and VC mixers for the open bars.

  • sleepingmonkey's picture

    Site recruiting event at BB about 30 students total and a room full of MDs and associates (let say about nine total). Everyone was wearing dark suits, except for one overseas student that wore a full-on Mexican tuxedo. Yup, blue jeans and a jean jacket.

    MD's opening remarks commented on how nice everyone looked, including the guy who had the balls to wear jeans. (It wasn't balls, it was just stupidity.)

  • In reply to sleepingmonkey
    Nouveau Richie's picture

    sleepingmonkey:
    Site recruiting event at BB about 30 students total and a room full of MDs and associates (let say about nine total). Everyone was wearing dark suits, except for one overseas student that wore a full-on Mexican tuxedo. Yup, blue jeans and a jean jacket.

    MD's opening remarks commented on how nice everyone looked, including the guy who had the balls to wear jeans. (It wasn't balls, it was just stupidity.)

    Where was your recruiting event, the 1990s? I don't think I've even seen a jean jacket in the past ten years, lol.

  • blastoise's picture

    at informational session they had 6 firms show up one of them was the IRS i asked the lady is she allowed to carry a gun and do you think the irs will be making job cuts soon due to the deficit then when she said she was attending keller school of buisness and the kid said wow good school, i replied with its devry ..... he said oh my apologies LOL

  • In reply to rainman89
    drexelalum11's picture

    rainman89:
    To be fair, those Rothschild pens are quite nice.

    acs_london:
    At the Banking and Financial Services Fair at LSE, the following conversation took place:

    Rothschild Representative (RR): What interests you about financial services?
    Student: I want to be a trader at Rothschild
    RR: Ummm.. We don't do that. We're purely into corporate finance advisory
    Student: Ohh.. I want to be an investment banker
    RR: Really?
    Student: Yeah, really. Can I have one of those Rothschild pens now?

    Yeah, but the Rothschild HR are even nicer

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  • D M's picture

    "You stop being an asshole when it sucks to be you." -IlliniProgrammer
    "Your grammar made me wish I'd been aborted." -happypantsmcgee