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So last Friday, the guys and I got together for some pre-gaming before heading to 1OAK at around 11:00 PM to celebrate our better-than-expected bonuses this year (two of us are PE associates, and the other 2 are VPs at MM banks). So after waiting in line outside for a while, we finally make it inside over to the bar, and there she was. She had on a tight, black dress looking fine as hell; better than any photos I'd ever seen of her. I went up to her and fed her one of the typical pick-up lines, which led to talking about her previous relationship with Ryan Reynolds, and ultimately, what I do for a living.

Surprisingly, Scarlett knows quite a bit about the industry as her step-brother is an MBB consultant. After trying to explain to her I add social value in my high finnance role, she whispered something in my ear I won't ever forget. "Is your fund short or long?" Now my first reaction was that the concept of Private Equity apparently didn't quite click for her, but I played along anyway and told her we were value-based, but long-term and invested in a wide range of industries. The financial whiz giggled, and we went home, where my fund promptly transformed into a growth fund, and ultimately, an event-driven one.

2

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Comments (24)

  • G.M.Trevelyan's picture

    Pics or it didn't happen.

  • redrut's picture

    This happened to me but then I shook my head and continued putting numbers into my exhaustive spreadsheet

    1percentblog.com

  • cakepie's picture

    > Now my first reaction was that the concept of Private Equity apparently didn't quite click for her, but I played along anyway

    This is the greatest line I have ever read on WSO

  • oreos's picture

    plagiarized

    "After you work on Wall Street it's a choice, would you rather work at McDonalds or on the sell-side? I would choose McDonalds over the sell-side." - David Tepper

  • hopesanddreams's picture

    '...where my fund promptly transformed into a growth fund, and ultimately, an event-driven one'
    --> only PE guys would say ^^ instead of 'i got laid'. way to go!

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  • mongoose's picture

    Admins should take action against such blatant plagiarism.

  • OMS's picture
  • chicandtoughness's picture

    That style of writing is way too distinctive to be anything but LSO.

    Currently: becoming a clinical psychologist... yep, I quit finance
    Previously: M&A consulting (Big 4), M&A banking (MM), business research (HBS)

  • In reply to cakepie
    Matrick's picture

    camspin:
    > Now my first reaction was that the concept of Private Equity apparently didn't quite click for her, but I played along anyway

    This is the greatest line I have ever read on WSO

    Agreed :)

    I'm talking about liquid. Rich enough to have your own jet. Rich enough not to waste time. Fifty, a hundred million dollars, buddy. A player. Or nothing.

    See my Blog & AMA

  • philosophizingphilosoraptor's picture

    Plagiarizing from the Leveraged Sellout? Really man???

    To the starving man, beans are caviar

  • BlackHat's picture

    Someone really posted this?

    I hate victims who respect their executioners

  • TonyPerkis's picture

    this is the shittiest troll post of all time...zero troll club for you

    I eat success for breakfast...with skim milk

  • In reply to Whgm45
    AllDay_028's picture

    Whgm45:
    She's not even that hot...

    Ya dude, what a scrub. I can't believe another 5'7 jewish kid with aspergers and inflated self esteem because of middle class salary is bragging about banging some mediocre actress like Scarjo.
  • In reply to AllDay_028
    Whgm45's picture

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  • In reply to AndyLouis
    Hooked on LEAPS's picture

    Competition is a sin.

    -John D. Rockefeller