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I think your best route would be to join a Big 4 accounting firm and getting ACA qualified. From there you should be in a good position to transfer from (presumably) an Audit role into Transaction Services or FDD. 

From there, you could be valued by LMM / MM PE firms, and some of the smaller banks. This is a route which is realistic and well-precedented, but it absolutely is not a golden ticket. You need to be extremely good, and top in your class at your Big 4 firm. You also need a little luck, but that's normal. 

Other routes you could consider would be to go to do a graduate degree at a better school, but based on what you've described, I won't pretend that this is going to be easy for you.

 

Agreee with this although honestly I went from Non target uni (zero internships) - ACA at tiny audit firm and eventually to IB. Don’t get disheartened by fools telling you things can’t be done. Anything can be done if you are competent and work hard.

 

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