I'm a student at a target school who's feeling a bit lost.
In high school I was the textbook prodigy, as most of us probably were. In college, however, I went through some tough experiences, and I ended up getting shitty grades for a solid two years. The third year I got diagnosed with ADD and started taking Adderall, so my grades finally rose again. It really helped me at least stop feeling suicidal, but I still wasn't on top of my game like I was in high school.
I haven't even had a moment to think about my dreams, because I've been in this weird montage of blurry days for as long as I can remember. I finally spent time with my family recently, however, and it really brought me down to earth. I started doing more research about industries, and discovered I'm really interested in real estate and banking. I built some models and wrote some reports just for the hell of it, and I also started finding some interesting finance Youtubers who were into building simulations.
I think it'd be really fun to intern on Wall Street this summer, particularly in investment banking, since that'll be the scene. Here's the problem- I only really have intelligence. I don't have performance (my grades look pretty rough on paper because I barely went to class half the time) and I can't really position myself as responsible, since after all I missed recruiting season. I know a lot of people would say this industry isn't for me. They're probably right, but I feel like I need to get a taste just to see what it's like. I'm kind of an existentialist (cringy but whatever) and some part of me feels like I'm obligated to try my hardest at securing this experience for myself.
I feel like most of the banks already hired, and I don't know what story to tell recruiters. I thought about mentioning the ADD but that just feels a bit slimey...like I'm trying to exploit my problems to evade responsibility. Also, I worry that employers would discriminate against me if I disclosed, so I don't really wanna air my dirty laundry. Most of the networking sessions on campus are for sophomores now...which is just a tad excruciating. A lot of people would say it's over, and that's the official story, but I can't shake the feeling that if I play my cards right and someone wants to get me in there, they'll find a way.
So....it's March and I want to do Wall Street. How can I pull it off?