The cologne that changed everything....

It is the year 2010... a man by the name of Oliver Creed releases his new Eau De Parfum, Creed Aventus... I never knew the turn my life was about to take.

I smelt Aventus the for the first time in January of 2011. It was a Tuesday if I recall, snowy, cold. I stopped into the Creed boutique on my way home from work to take cover from the elements. A friend had mentioned to me how Aventus had changed his life - I thought he was exaggerating of course.. but I said why not give it a smell. I have to say, I loved it, I knew it would be a hit. Like many, I was reluctant to spend $435 on a cologne. I mean... that's a lot of money for a fragrance. But, I went ahead and bought it cause I mean... what else am I going to do with $435? Probably not much.. so here we go. Full of glee I exit the store and out into the cold NYC snow I go.

Little did I know I had just changed the trajectory of my life.

Being a person in finance, rate of return is everything. Since Aventus can mask the smell almost any putrid stench, I realized that I can now shower 50% less than before. This translates to more time at the office grinding and working on my side hustles. By my calculations, over the last 8 years I have made/saved nearly $250,000 due to this. (This is after my $2,610 /yr Aventus expense). I am now on track to quit my job at 35 and move the Cayman Islands.

Additionally, I now can get any girl simply by walking past her on Madison Ave. I mean, its similar of a bee to honey. It's nature, its encoded in their DNA. When I tell them that I am no longer interested in them they immediately call the police on me with false allegations. Its like #metoo pt. 2 at the NYPD headquarters. (I think they are bringing on additional staff due to this if anyone needs a job). This is how I met my wife, the love of my life. She was a bartender at 1OAK and she quit on the spot when she saw my swept back Gordon Gekko hair, Gucci deal sleds and smelt the Aventus pouring off of me. She had no chance.

Anyway, my wife and I are looking forward to our retirement in the Caymans.

Thank you Oliver Creed for all you have done for me and so many others.

Comments (15)

Jun 18, 2019

These are the contributions we need more of, +1 SB

    • 1
Jun 18, 2019

Quality scent

Array

Jun 18, 2019

it only smellz

    • 2
Jun 18, 2019

I came here looking for a drakkar noir history lesson and was needless to say disappointed by what I found instead.

Jun 18, 2019

Aventus is my go to.

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Jun 18, 2019
WearSomethingFabulous:

I realized that I can now shower 50% less than before. This translates to more time at the office grinding and working on my side hustles. By my calculations, over the last 8 years I have made/saved nearly $250,000 due to this. (This is after my $2,610 /yr Aventus expense). I am now on track to quit my job at 35 and move the Cayman Islands.

Quality post but damn....
Assuming you used to shower every day that translates to 365 showers per year (366 in a leap year). If we further assume that you spent 10 minutes in the shower
10*365= 3,650 minutes/60 = 60.83 hours rounded to 61 hours per year
You said you've saved $250k over the past 8 years
which means 61 hours * 8 years= 488 hours total
You've stated that you're able to shower 50% less, that means if we take 488 hours/2= 244 hours.
Now you said that because of the 244 hours you've saved, you were able to make an extra $250k.
$250k/244= 1025$ per hour
If the shower was ten minutes long--> 1025/6= $171 per shower cost

Dude..... If I reverse that math, $1025 hour on a typical 80 hours week, which you have 50 of,
$1205 x 80 x 50= $4,100,000 a year.
If you're pulling $4M+ a year, you can literally have a bathtub full of Creed if you want

thots and prayers

    • 5
Most Helpful
Jun 18, 2019

Thoughtful analysis, run it again with 20 min shower and circle back. Thx.

    • 6
Jun 18, 2019

Your take home goes from $4,100,000--> $2,050,000
a 20 minute shower will royally fuck over the projections
massage the numbers a bit, we really need the showers to be about 10 minutes or less to pull $4M +

thots and prayers

Jun 19, 2019

This is how I imagine every IB-PE hardo

Jun 19, 2019

If you want options, all of my SO's friends have gone out to buy their SOs Mont Blanc Legend. It's been my go-to for 7 years. Just a heads up. Only $85 a bottle.

Jun 20, 2019

But the 100ml is $435.... The 1000ML is $1305. It is the expense but it smells incredible. You would definitely like Jeremy Fragrance on youtube. What about Bleu de Chanel Eau de Toilette? There are some really great fragrances that are decently priced.

Jun 23, 2019

Hilarious.

Love Aventus. Hate it when morons put on too much and the amount of silage coming off them is nauseating, which is more often than not in my experience.

Jun 24, 2019

sex panther 1

Jun 23, 2019
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