Pages

  • Sharebar

Mod Note (Andy): Throwback Thursday - This was a originally posted June 2012

So the interns are out in full force. Hoards of them.

(Before I get into this-- I have no idea why they are called "SA's" these days- they will always be interns to me.)

I digress. I'm going to keep this brief and to the point, hopefully it's helpful to some young monkeys out there. But first, a joke:

What's the difference between a sperm and a lawyer?
The sperm has at least a 1/10,000 chance of becoming a human being.

I digress again. Here is the list:

Interns:
1) Stick out their hand for a shake EVERYWHERE, EVERY TIME they see you. It's getting to be comical, and I'm about to start leaving these f*ckers hanging. Rule of thumb: don't shake hands when you casually bump into colleagues- in the subway, in the elevator, especially in the restroom- thou shalt not shake hands UNLESS i) you are meeting a senior person for the first time OR ii) if a hand is shown, obviously you shake it.

2) seem not to realize that suit vents need to be clipped. I'm talking about those little flaps on your suitjacket that hang around your ass. They come sewn together - but you're supposed to clip that little string.

3) should watch what they say to one another on the subway. We're listening. Even if we have earphones in, we may have the sound on mute to see if you're shitting on your group. We are smarter than you. Never forget that.

4) should not be concerned about the brand that you're wearing. We don't expect you to come in wearing a hickey suit, Ferragamos and a Hermes tie. In fact, if you do dress as well as I do, I'll probably assume you're a spoiled little shit because I know for a FACT that you don't earn enough to drop $3,000 on one day's wardrobe.

5) should not wear watches that are better than your superior's watch. See #4 logic.  Some fucking intern was flashing around the cafe in a patek the other day. Seriously? I assumed it was his fathers, I also assumed the kid has a self esteem issue. Why else would an intern be wearing a 30k watch? Is he trying to make a statement? Well the only statement he made was "im a douchewaffle." good intern watch: tissot.

6) should not leave the office before I do. Sit there and surf the internet or something- don't leave before your colleagues. 

7) should only talk about their background when asked. I don't care what you did in high school. When you talk about that shit I feel old - you want me to feel good when I talk to you. Not old. (brotip: bankers like to talk about themselves - generally speaking, we are arrogant and love to gloat about the deals we've structured. Ask us about that - oe our families- and we'll talk your ears off)

8)  wear big shirts. Maybe this is just me, but all the interns I see seem to swim in their dress shirts. Make sure your shit fits!

9) should be wary of the company they keep- you will be judged by it. 

10) should NOT talk about fake IDs. I ask if you're 21- if you're not, say "no". Don't say "no, but I have a fake."  This was actually said to me by my "mentee". Do you really think I'm going to hit the bar with you if you're not 21? Not a chance in hell. 

Hopefully this means I will see fewer sewn suit vents, because that shit really gets under my skin.

23 2

The WSO Advantage - Investment Banking

Financial Modeling Training

IB Templates, M&A, LBO, Valuation + Learn More.

IB Interview Prep Pack

30,000+ sold & REAL questions Learn More.

Resume Help from Actual IB Pros

Land More IB Interviews. Learn More.

Find Your Perfect IB Mentor

Realistic IB Mock Interviews. Learn More.

Comments (142)

  • In reply to streetwannabe
    bfin's picture

    streetwannabe:
    bfin:
    streetwannabe:
    blastoise:
    why do we have to leave after you?

    Some of us our getting paid hourly and are only allowed to work 40 hours ....

    Haha, I was thinking about this. Today I left at 5.15pm and a guy on the elevator said "What are we paying you for to leave when we do?"

    [Reply] "Nothing"

    "....Oh... really?"

    But, fortunately I commute from Hartford CT to NYC every day (5 hr commute total) so my manager almost forces me to leave so I can get home before 8.30pm

    You go to UConn?

    No, does everyone from UConn live in Hartford?

    most people who go to UConn live in CT,Hartford is in CT. Most kids in CT who are willing to do what you're doing go to UConn because if they went to Yale life would be easier for them ,but they are too smart to go to CCSU..ECSU..etc.

    The answer to your question is 1) network 2) get involved 3) beef up your resume 4) repeat -happypantsmcgee

    WSO is not your personal search function.

  • In reply to bfin
    streetwannabe's picture

    bfin:
    streetwannabe:
    bfin:
    streetwannabe:
    blastoise:
    why do we have to leave after you?

    Some of us our getting paid hourly and are only allowed to work 40 hours ....

    Haha, I was thinking about this. Today I left at 5.15pm and a guy on the elevator said "What are we paying you for to leave when we do?"

    [Reply] "Nothing"

    "....Oh... really?"

    But, fortunately I commute from Hartford CT to NYC every day (5 hr commute total) so my manager almost forces me to leave so I can get home before 8.30pm

    You go to UConn?

    No, does everyone from UConn live in Hartford?

    most people who go to UConn live in CT,Hartford is in CT. Most kids in CT who are willing to do what you're doing go to UConn because if they went to Yale life would be easier for them ,but they are too smart to go to CCSU..ECSU..etc.

    haha, you don't have to tell me Hartford is in CT. I commute every fucking day. Get up at 4.30am you know, but my school is (unfortunately) probably equivalent to CCSU blah blah blah.

    "History doesn't repeat itself, but it does rhyme."

  • AVPGuerilla's picture

    To all you silly shitheads whining about my post: grow a pair.

    If any if you fuckers actually interned under me you'd know that I go way the hell out of my way to make sure a good intern gets a FT offer. And as far as mentoring, what the fuck do you think this post is about? I'm trying to point out silly shit interns do- so they will READ this and NOT do said silly shit any more, maybe, hopefully will look more mature and prepared for the workforce. Do you really think I stand to gain anything if you bastards start carrying yourselves a little more professionally?

    And to the other whiners: no, I was never in your shoes. I never interned anywhere. I started in operations in 2006, and busted ass to get to my "middle management" front office, revenue generating position as a structured/lev fin banker.

    You whiners are the reason WSO doesn't have more experienced folks putting time into the site. Too much riffraff and trollish bullshit.

    Finally, to everyone who got a chuckle out of this and saw that I wasn't trying to shit on the help- rather, that my aim was to help the help: congratulations, you have a pair of testes.

    Step 1: Dream the Dream || Step 2: Live the Dream || Step 3: Rinse, repeat.

  • In reply to WreckEmFinance
    AVPGuerilla's picture

    WreckEmFinance:
    streetwannabe:
    WreckEmFinance:
    yep, that's positive encouraging stuff right there. i definitely want to work for that guy one day. since he's so encouraging and all. being an intern for that guy might just be the best internship in the history of mankind.

    Who are you talking to? You're so mysterious...


    indeed sir. indeed. but just in case, i was talking to silly AVP (read: middle management) who thinks he's too good to offer an encouraging word here and there about things he learned along the way, rather than pooing his pants and thinking it smells like aqua velva. i dunno, it might help the spoiled rich boy to realize sooner rather than later that he's not that special and the only real way to impress is to bust your butt and work hard rather than keep on sucking that parental teet with stuff they obviously didn't buy with money they earned themselves.
    .

    Listen to me shitstain: you will never achieve your dreams with that attitude. You want encouragement, advice? Track my posts and read "my no-so-secrets-to-success." I was in exactly your shoes 7 years ago. And before you make assumptions about my background- I grew up broke as fuck. I went to a CUNY college- my mother raised me alone on an income of under 20k a year. I waited tables throughout college and started at my bank making $37k. I've increased that number tenfold because I WORK HARD AND DON'T BITCH.

    I've told many people "if I did it, so can you". And the fact is you probably can too- if you drop that shitty attitude of yours. Good luck with that.

    Step 1: Dream the Dream || Step 2: Live the Dream || Step 3: Rinse, repeat.

  • In reply to streetwannabe
    IBD.Addict's picture

    streetwannabe:
    blastoise:
    why do we have to leave after you?

    Some of us our getting paid hourly and are only allowed to work 40 hours ....

    Haha, I was thinking about this. Today I left at 5.15pm and a guy on the elevator said "What are we paying you for to leave when we do?"

    [Reply] "Nothing"

    "....Oh... really?"

    But, fortunately I commute from Hartford CT to NYC every day (5 hr commute total) so my manager almost forces me to leave so I can get home before 8.30pm

    That what one heck of a conversation killer. To avoid excessive journey, why not to temporarily rent a room somewhere near the office ? Should prove to be quite a cost saver.

    Competition never sleeps. Then again, chances are that neither do you.

  • IBD.Addict's picture

    Thoroughly enjoyed your post. It should prove useful during my internship this summer.

    The problem with overdressing sounds like a bit of an exaggeration. Most of my colleagues work to support themselves with their studies. Not a chance in hell they would spend money on an overly lavish suit. Your experience?

    Competition never sleeps. Then again, chances are that neither do you.

  • In reply to AVPGuerilla
    All American Reject's picture

    AVPGuerilla:
    If any if you fuckers actually interned under me you'd know that I go way the hell out of my way to make sure a good intern gets a FT offer.

    I am willing to test this theory out. If you need an intern with a backstory similar to yours that's still waiting for a break, I'm your guy.

  • In reply to blastoise
    SECfinance's picture

    blastoise:
    why do we have to leave after you?

    Some of us our getting paid hourly and are only allowed to work 40 hours ....

    Wrong, you're only allowed to book 40 hours.

    DominikKania:
    Thoroughly enjoyed your post. It should prove useful during my internship this summer.

    The problem with overdressing sounds like a bit of an exaggeration. Most of my colleagues work to support themselves with their studies. Not a chance in hell they would spend money on an overly lavish suit. Your experience?

    May not be your experience but I guarantee there are a lot of college kids running around NYC in clothes they could never afford if they didn't have Dad's AmEx.

    As an intern I agree with his comments on watches/clothes. In my opinion, you want to look good, but you also want to look like you need the job. Running around with a $30k watch on? You'll probably be OK in life if you don't get the offer. Even though I have some Hermes & Ferragamo ties (passed down/stolen out of Dad's closet), there's a reason I wear Jos A. Bank ties to the office.

    I don't wear my watch to the office either. It's nowhere near a Patek (TAG) but it's nice. No need to risk anything when there's a job offer on the line.

  • Unforseen's picture

    You really wouldn't wear a tag to your office?

  • Mr.Mathie's picture

    This is gold haha, I think some of us can learn better now

    Mr.Mathie | Ideas are nothing without execution - Jeux de Commerce Central

  • In reply to Mr.Mathie
    bfin's picture

    j.park12:
    This is gold haha, I think some of us can learn better now

    I know a J. Park. He is a nut job.

    The answer to your question is 1) network 2) get involved 3) beef up your resume 4) repeat -happypantsmcgee

    WSO is not your personal search function.

  • TheMilkman's picture

    Thanks for the post, as an intern I appreciate to see how I aware from a "senior perspective".
    Remember just as you make assumptions about your superiors, they will certainly return the favor.

    DLJ Analyst Class '96

  • In reply to AVPGuerilla
    WreckEmFinance's picture

    AVPGuerilla:
    WreckEmFinance:
    streetwannabe:
    WreckEmFinance:
    yep, that's positive encouraging stuff right there. i definitely want to work for that guy one day. since he's so encouraging and all. being an intern for that guy might just be the best internship in the history of mankind.

    Who are you talking to? You're so mysterious...


    indeed sir. indeed. but just in case, i was talking to silly AVP (read: middle management) who thinks he's too good to offer an encouraging word here and there about things he learned along the way, rather than pooing his pants and thinking it smells like aqua velva. i dunno, it might help the spoiled rich boy to realize sooner rather than later that he's not that special and the only real way to impress is to bust your butt and work hard rather than keep on sucking that parental teet with stuff they obviously didn't buy with money they earned themselves.
    .

    Listen to me shitstain: you will never achieve your dreams with that attitude. You want encouragement, advice? Track my posts and read "my no-so-secrets-to-success." I was in exactly your shoes 7 years ago. And before you make assumptions about my background- I grew up broke as fuck. I went to a CUNY college- my mother raised me alone on an income of under 20k a year. I waited tables throughout college and started at my bank making $37k. I've increased that number tenfold because I WORK HARD AND DON'T BITCH.

    I've told many people "if I did it, so can you". And the fact is you probably can too- if you drop that shitty attitude of yours. Good luck with that.

    Why thank you. I appreciate that. You may just be on your way world domination, possibly. Of course you might not believe this, but I have a newfound respect for you. I also am working my way through college, busting my ass. And I have just as much disdain for the spoiled rich boys as you do. Now of course, this is the internet. And as such, no one gives a crap what they really say. So I, just as much as you and everyone else on the internet, let loose with what's truly in my mind and do not mince words. And the internet is good for that, and I like that just fine. That's part of the fun. But if indeed you are truly taking offense to what I said, as I was apparently taking offense to what you said, even though I agree in principle with most of it, well then, we'll agree to disagree. My main qualm was your approach in being so intentionally douchy. I believe encouraging words are the best thing. And I believe it is more than possible to correct misguided interns in an encouraging way rather than a condescending way. Indeed, you may be a literary genius as your use of hyperbole is quite superb. And yet I am also condescending to you through this whole blurb, so...yah.... But then again, I guess you've earned it. And I don't know you so nothing I say can actually have any credibility in your mind personally. Again, this part of what makes this site a fun dealio. Most people don't know each other personally and we don't even put our real faces on the avatar, but we rip the shit out of each other or encourage or whatever, share stories, experiences. Yaaaay internet. Yet another reason I consider this site pure fluff. By no means a truly serious career finding site. More of an entertainment, residual information gathering type thing. And that's good. And that's fine. And thus, Good luck to you sir.

    "Everything comes to those who hustle while they wait."
    -Thomas Edison

  • tcufinance0801's picture

    uconn is not in hartford ignorant...it's in storrs, ct

    "An investment in knowledge pays the best interest."

  • In reply to SlikRick
    Do what I gotta do's picture

    SlikRick:
    When I interned at a Boutique IB, we were given a $25 allowance for dinner. The internship was unpaid, but the dinner stipend and the free downtown parking pass was nice. That being said, one of my fellow interns made it his mission to get as close to the $25 limit as possible. Even when we had dinner at Chipotle, he ordered 3 burritos (2 for later) and the bill came out to $24.75. Needless the say, our MD got pissed and the dinner stipend rules were changed considerably afterwards.

    your MD sounds greedy as fuck. He's using a supposedly high quality personnel for free anyways, and he can't even let that happen? Tell him to go fuck himself.

  • In reply to tcufinance0801
    bearcats's picture

    ibanking0801:
    uconn is not in hartford ignorant...it's in storrs, ct

    Not knowing something irrelevant and no one cares about is not ignorant.

The WSO Advantage - Investment Banking

Financial Modeling Training

IB Templates, M&A, LBO, Valuation + Learn More.

IB Interview Prep Pack

30,000+ sold & REAL questions Learn More.

Resume Help from Actual IB Pros

Land More IB Interviews. Learn More.

Find Your Perfect IB Mentor

Realistic IB Mock Interviews. Learn More.

  • Disincentivy's picture

    Also, interns: Do not stare at anyone or anything no matter how fascinated or startled you are.

    I may not be on the Jedi Council, but I sure am great with the Force.

    See my WSO blog posts

  • In reply to AVPGuerilla
    RE Capital Markets's picture

    AVPGuerilla:
    To all you silly shitheads whining about my post: grow a pair.

    If any if you fuckers actually interned under me you'd know that I go way the hell out of my way to make sure a good intern gets a FT offer. And as far as mentoring, what the fuck do you think this post is about? I'm trying to point out silly shit interns do- so they will READ this and NOT do said silly shit any more, maybe, hopefully will look more mature and prepared for the workforce. Do you really think I stand to gain anything if you bastards start carrying yourselves a little more professionally?

    And to the other whiners: no, I was never in your shoes. I never interned anywhere. I started in operations in 2006, and busted ass to get to my "middle management" front office, revenue generating position as a structured/lev fin banker.

    You whiners are the reason WSO doesn't have more experienced folks putting time into the site. Too much riffraff and trollish bullshit.

    Finally, to everyone who got a chuckle out of this and saw that I wasn't trying to shit on the help- rather, that my aim was to help the help: congratulations, you have a pair of testes.

    Your tone is off-putting.

    I have seen your post history and I know you try to help, but you could communicate a little more effectively.

    Man made money, money never made the man

  • In reply to Disincentivy
    Oreos's picture

    Disincentivy:
    Also, interns: Do not stare at anyone or anything no matter how fascinated or startled you are.

    You've been getting your bewbs out again haven't you?

    .

  • In reply to Oreos
    Disincentivy's picture

    Oreos:
    Disincentivy:
    Also, interns: Do not stare at anyone or anything no matter how fascinated or startled you are.

    You've been getting your bewbs out again haven't you?

    Yes :( I am sorry. I am trying to quit my boob showing addiction.

    I may not be on the Jedi Council, but I sure am great with the Force.

    See my WSO blog posts

  • technoviking's picture
  • In reply to WreckEmFinance
    WallStreetOasis.com's picture

    WreckEmFinance:
    Again, this part of what makes this site a fun dealio. Most people don't know each other personally and we don't even put our real faces on the avatar, but we rip the shit out of each other or encourage or whatever, share stories, experiences. Yaaaay internet. Yet another reason I consider this site pure fluff. By no means a truly serious career finding site. More of an entertainment, residual information gathering type thing. And that's good. And that's fine. And thus, Good luck to you sir.

    Most people don't know each other personally? You mean the people that are dumb enough not to take advantage of the obvious networking opportunities on here every day and at the Happy Hours and the WSO Conference this summer?

    Yeah, I guess this isn't a "serious career finding site". Maybe you should tell that to these people? http://www.wallstreetoasis.com/forum/wso-success-s... Or the countless members that have stayed on Monty09's famous lucky couch and landed jobs as a result? Or the thousands of people that have thanked our team over the years for providing a fun and useful site focused on finance careers.

    Yay internet. Go back to LinkedIn and keep cold-emailing...or stay on here, build some relationships in a more relaxed and fun (OMG, networking can be fun?!?) atmosphere. You might learn something. And even end up with a solid job. Plenty of other less arrogant members have done it in the past.

    Yes, a fun "dealio" indeed.

    Welcome.

  • Bearearns's picture

    # 10 is too funny.

  • Bearearns's picture

    # 10 is too funny.

  • In reply to Unforseen
    SECfinance's picture

    Unforseen:
    You really wouldn't wear a tag to your office?

    Well first, I'm not in NYC so there are less people blinging out around the office.

    Second, yes. If I get the offer I'll wear it for FT, but I haven't proved anything yet and I'm keeping my head down until I do.

  • In reply to WallStreetOasis.com
    WreckEmFinance's picture

    WallStreetOasis.com:
    WreckEmFinance:
    Again, this part of what makes this site a fun dealio. Most people don't know each other personally and we don't even put our real faces on the avatar, but we rip the shit out of each other or encourage or whatever, share stories, experiences. Yaaaay internet. Yet another reason I consider this site pure fluff. By no means a truly serious career finding site. More of an entertainment, residual information gathering type thing. And that's good. And that's fine. And thus, Good luck to you sir.

    Most people don't know each other personally? You mean the people that are dumb enough not to take advantage of the obvious networking opportunities on here every day and at the Happy Hours and the WSO Conference this summer?

    Yeah, I guess this isn't a "serious career finding site". Maybe you should tell that to these people? http://www.wallstreetoasis.com/forum/wso-success-s... Or the countless members that have stayed on Monty09's famous lucky couch and landed jobs as a result? Or the thousands of people that have thanked our team over the years for providing a fun and useful site focused on finance careers.

    Yay internet. Go back to LinkedIn and keep cold-emailing...or stay on here, build some relationships in a more relaxed and fun (OMG, networking can be fun?!?) atmosphere. You might learn something. And even end up with a solid job. Plenty of other less arrogant members have done it in the past.

    Yes, a fun "dealio" indeed.

    Welcome.

    Well alrighty then. I stand corrected. However, I am not in New York or wherever the Happy Hours are. Would love to attend one if I was. Networking opportunities, sure. Guess I'll have to shell out the $ to access the networking opportunities. I'll save up. And currently I've been utilizing my BB's career center which has been an excellent resource way out here in West Texas. Guess it's more of a locational thing for me. And I have not read the success stories, so obviously I was speaking out of turn. And I apologize. However, there are tons of other career websites that don't tolerate the vitriol we see on here sometimes. Which I attribute that to fun dealio aspect of the site. And that's all well and good because it seems to be designed that way. In my inexperience, novice, still undergrad mind, it just seems to me that if some employers came on here and saw some of the vitriol, they might not want to hire those people. And there are good people on here, for example BlackHat, who gave me some great networking advice when I messaged him one time. Thanks for the advice. I will do as such. Networking is fun! I love meeting new people and asking them about their experiences. Sometimes they don't call people shitstain though or say eff every other second. Again, thank you for the advice. It is encouraging that there are real, professional people on here, and obviously I have much to learn.

    Does Dallas or Houston have happy hours?

    "Everything comes to those who hustle while they wait."
    -Thomas Edison

  • In reply to WallStreetOasis.com
    rufiolove's picture

    WallStreetOasis.com:

    Or the countless members that have stayed on Monty09's famous lucky couch and landed jobs as a result?

    Patrick! Monty runs the casting couch???? I KNEW IT!!!!!

    jk... love you Monty

  • In reply to WreckEmFinance
    WallStreetOasis.com's picture

    WreckEmFinance:
    WallStreetOasis.com:
    WreckEmFinance:
    Again, this part of what makes this site a fun dealio. Most people don't know each other personally and we don't even put our real faces on the avatar, but we rip the shit out of each other or encourage or whatever, share stories, experiences. Yaaaay internet. Yet another reason I consider this site pure fluff. By no means a truly serious career finding site. More of an entertainment, residual information gathering type thing. And that's good. And that's fine. And thus, Good luck to you sir.

    Most people don't know each other personally? You mean the people that are dumb enough not to take advantage of the obvious networking opportunities on here every day and at the Happy Hours and the WSO Conference this summer?

    Yeah, I guess this isn't a "serious career finding site". Maybe you should tell that to these people? http://www.wallstreetoasis.com/forum/wso-success-s... Or the countless members that have stayed on Monty09's famous lucky couch and landed jobs as a result? Or the thousands of people that have thanked our team over the years for providing a fun and useful site focused on finance careers.

    Yay internet. Go back to LinkedIn and keep cold-emailing...or stay on here, build some relationships in a more relaxed and fun (OMG, networking can be fun?!?) atmosphere. You might learn something. And even end up with a solid job. Plenty of other less arrogant members have done it in the past.

    Yes, a fun "dealio" indeed.

    Welcome.

    Well alrighty then. I stand corrected. However, I am not in New York or wherever the Happy Hours are. Would love to attend one if I was. Networking opportunities, sure. Guess I'll have to shell out the $ to access the networking opportunities. I'll save up. And currently I've been utilizing my BB's career center which has been an excellent resource way out here in West Texas. Guess it's more of a locational thing for me. And I have not read the success stories, so obviously I was speaking out of turn. And I apologize. However, there are tons of other career websites that don't tolerate the vitriol we see on here sometimes. Which I attribute that to fun dealio aspect of the site. And that's all well and good because it seems to be designed that way. In my inexperience, novice, still undergrad mind, it just seems to me that if some employers came on here and saw some of the vitriol, they might not want to hire those people. And there are good people on here, for example BlackHat, who gave me some great networking advice when I messaged him one time. Thanks for the advice. I will do as such. Networking is fun! I love meeting new people and asking them about their experiences. Sometimes they don't call people shitstain though or say eff every other second. Again, thank you for the advice. It is encouraging that there are real, professional people on here, and obviously I have much to learn.

    Does Dallas or Houston have happy hours?

    whatever dude - yeah, you have to shell out $ to access networking opportunities...really? All of the forums, private messages and access to everyone on WSO is 100% free. The paid services (Wall St. Mentors, Video Library, Job Board, Resume Review, Interview Guides, etc) are to help the most ambitious job seekers out there get a leg up. I dont see anyone putting a gun to your head to force you a buy these services, but I do see over 100,000 discussions in our archives and thousands of comp data in our Company Database available for free...not to mention great users like Blackhat that give you "GREAT advice", yet in another thread you call WSO useless. Might also want to read up on what a Certified User is and read our entire FAQ section: http://www.wallstreetoasis.com/frequently-asked-qu...

    Oh, and just an FYI, Houston probably has more happy hours / dinners / etc. than any other city outside of New York (look up the Energy Rodeo). Largely because of Gene's leadership (monty09), MANY kids off of this site have gotten great gigs...the fact that you don't know this is just further indication that you haven't even given WSO a fair shot. Gene now runs a recruiting firm out of Houston called RTC Group.

    Yes, people can be assholes on here - and there are likely assholes in your office. I think we're all adults and can handle a little vitriol on an anonymous internet forum, right? (I think our mods do a great job for the record)

  • In reply to rufiolove
    WallStreetOasis.com's picture

    rufiolove:
    WallStreetOasis.com:

    Or the countless members that have stayed on Monty09's famous lucky couch and landed jobs as a result?

    Patrick! Monty runs the casting couch???? I KNEW IT!!!!!

    jk... love you Monty

    haha - I think Money said that couch was like 7 out of 12 in getting kids jobs or something insane like that.

    All I know is I had the same fate as Midas my first night in Houston with Monty...I was hugging the toilet seat.

  • In reply to WallStreetOasis.com
    rufiolove's picture

    WallStreetOasis.com:
    WreckEmFinance:
    WallStreetOasis.com:
    WreckEmFinance:
    Again, this part of what makes this site a fun dealio. Most people don't know each other personally and we don't even put our real faces on the avatar, but we rip the shit out of each other or encourage or whatever, share stories, experiences. Yaaaay internet. Yet another reason I consider this site pure fluff. By no means a truly serious career finding site. More of an entertainment, residual information gathering type thing. And that's good. And that's fine. And thus, Good luck to you sir.

    Most people don't know each other personally? You mean the people that are dumb enough not to take advantage of the obvious networking opportunities on here every day and at the Happy Hours and the WSO Conference this summer?

    Yeah, I guess this isn't a "serious career finding site". Maybe you should tell that to these people? http://www.wallstreetoasis.com/forum/wso-success-s... Or the countless members that have stayed on Monty09's famous lucky couch and landed jobs as a result? Or the thousands of people that have thanked our team over the years for providing a fun and useful site focused on finance careers.

    Yay internet. Go back to LinkedIn and keep cold-emailing...or stay on here, build some relationships in a more relaxed and fun (OMG, networking can be fun?!?) atmosphere. You might learn something. And even end up with a solid job. Plenty of other less arrogant members have done it in the past.

    Yes, a fun "dealio" indeed.

    Welcome.

    Well alrighty then. I stand corrected. However, I am not in New York or wherever the Happy Hours are. Would love to attend one if I was. Networking opportunities, sure. Guess I'll have to shell out the $ to access the networking opportunities. I'll save up. And currently I've been utilizing my BB's career center which has been an excellent resource way out here in West Texas. Guess it's more of a locational thing for me. And I have not read the success stories, so obviously I was speaking out of turn. And I apologize. However, there are tons of other career websites that don't tolerate the vitriol we see on here sometimes. Which I attribute that to fun dealio aspect of the site. And that's all well and good because it seems to be designed that way. In my inexperience, novice, still undergrad mind, it just seems to me that if some employers came on here and saw some of the vitriol, they might not want to hire those people. And there are good people on here, for example BlackHat, who gave me some great networking advice when I messaged him one time. Thanks for the advice. I will do as such. Networking is fun! I love meeting new people and asking them about their experiences. Sometimes they don't call people shitstain though or say eff every other second. Again, thank you for the advice. It is encouraging that there are real, professional people on here, and obviously I have much to learn.

    Does Dallas or Houston have happy hours?

    whatever dude - yeah, you have to shell out $ to access networking opportunities...really? All of the forums, private messages and access to everyone on WSO is 100% free. The paid services (Wall St. Mentors, Video Library, Job Board, Resume Review, Interview Guides, etc) are to help the most ambitious job seekers out there get a leg up. I dont see anyone putting a gun to your head to force you a buy these services, but I do see over 100,000 discussions in our archives and thousands of comp data in our Company Database available for free...not to mention great users like Blackhat that give you "GREAT advice", yet in another thread you call WSO useless. Might also want to read up on what a Certified User is and read our entire FAQ section: http://www.wallstreetoasis.com/frequently-asked-qu...

    Oh, and just an FYI, Houston probably has more happy hours / dinners / etc. than any other city outside of New York (look up the Energy Rodeo). Largely because of Gene's leadership (monty09), MANY kids off of this site have gotten great gigs...the fact that you don't know this is just further indication that you haven't even given WSO a fair shot. Gene now runs a recruiting firm out of Houston called RTC Group.

    Yes, people can be assholes on here - and there are likely assholes in your office. I think we're all adults and can handle a little vitriol on an anonymous internet forum, right? (I think our mods do a great job for the record)

    word

  • In reply to SECfinance
    marketbeater's picture

    SECfinance:
    blastoise:
    why do we have to leave after you?

    Some of us our getting paid hourly and are only allowed to work 40 hours ....

    Wrong, you're only allowed to book 40 hours.

    DominikKania:
    Thoroughly enjoyed your post. It should prove useful during my internship this summer.

    The problem with overdressing sounds like a bit of an exaggeration. Most of my colleagues work to support themselves with their studies. Not a chance in hell they would spend money on an overly lavish suit. Your experience?

    May not be your experience but I guarantee there are a lot of college kids running around NYC in clothes they could never afford if they didn't have Dad's AmEx.

    As an intern I agree with his comments on watches/clothes. In my opinion, you want to look good, but you also want to look like you need the job. Running around with a $30k watch on? You'll probably be OK in life if you don't get the offer. Even though I have some Hermes & Ferragamo ties (passed down/stolen out of Dad's closet), there's a reason I wear Jos A. Bank ties to the office.

    I don't wear my watch to the office either. It's nowhere near a Patek (TAG) but it's nice. No need to risk anything when there's a job offer on the line.

    I agree

    keep your head down until you prove that you worth those stuff.

  • In reply to tcufinance0801
    bfin's picture

    ibanking0801:
    uconn is not in hartford ignorant...it's in storrs, ct

    UConn has a CAMPUS in Storrs, don't come with that "ignorant" word if you don't know how to use it. The point isn't about UConn being in Hartford it's about saying that UConn is the best public school in CT. Most kids from CT who do well (using the term extremely generally) but aren't incredibly gifted go to UConn instead of one of the CT private colleges.

    The answer to your question is 1) network 2) get involved 3) beef up your resume 4) repeat -happypantsmcgee

    WSO is not your personal search function.

  • In reply to IBD.Addict
    streetwannabe's picture

    DominikKania:
    streetwannabe:
    blastoise:
    why do we have to leave after you?

    Some of us our getting paid hourly and are only allowed to work 40 hours ....

    Haha, I was thinking about this. Today I left at 5.15pm and a guy on the elevator said "What are we paying you for to leave when we do?"

    [Reply] "Nothing"

    "....Oh... really?"

    But, fortunately I commute from Hartford CT to NYC every day (5 hr commute total) so my manager almost forces me to leave so I can get home before 8.30pm

    That what one heck of a conversation killer. To avoid excessive journey, why not to temporarily rent a room somewhere near the office ? Should prove to be quite a cost saver.

    Hartford is my cost saver. Free room with my girlfriend, so it was necessary. Would love to live in NYC for even a month, but it's just so damn expensive. And I got my internship offer in late May, so it was especially hard to find a place.

    "History doesn't repeat itself, but it does rhyme."

  • In reply to RE Capital Markets
    IBD.Addict's picture

    RE Capital Markets:
    AVPGuerilla:
    To all you silly shitheads whining about my post: grow a pair.

    If any if you fuckers actually interned under me you'd know that I go way the hell out of my way to make sure a good intern gets a FT offer. And as far as mentoring, what the fuck do you think this post is about? I'm trying to point out silly shit interns do- so they will READ this and NOT do said silly shit any more, maybe, hopefully will look more mature and prepared for the workforce. Do you really think I stand to gain anything if you bastards start carrying yourselves a little more professionally?

    And to the other whiners: no, I was never in your shoes. I never interned anywhere. I started in operations in 2006, and busted ass to get to my "middle management" front office, revenue generating position as a structured/lev fin banker.

    You whiners are the reason WSO doesn't have more experienced folks putting time into the site. Too much riffraff and trollish bullshit.

    Finally, to everyone who got a chuckle out of this and saw that I wasn't trying to shit on the help- rather, that my aim was to help the help: congratulations, you have a pair of testes.

    Your tone is off-putting.

    I have seen your post history and I know you try to help, but you could communicate a little more effectively.

    I respectfully disagree here. Take the tone with a pinch of salt and enjoy author's contribution. One of the most entertaining posts I've read in a while. Many thanks for the contribution!

    Competition never sleeps. Then again, chances are that neither do you.

  • In reply to WallStreetOasis.com
    txjustin's picture

    WallStreetOasis.com:
    WreckEmFinance:
    WallStreetOasis.com:
    WreckEmFinance:
    Again, this part of what makes this site a fun dealio. Most people don't know each other personally and we don't even put our real faces on the avatar, but we rip the shit out of each other or encourage or whatever, share stories, experiences. Yaaaay internet. Yet another reason I consider this site pure fluff. By no means a truly serious career finding site. More of an entertainment, residual information gathering type thing. And that's good. And that's fine. And thus, Good luck to you sir.

    Most people don't know each other personally? You mean the people that are dumb enough not to take advantage of the obvious networking opportunities on here every day and at the Happy Hours and the WSO Conference this summer?

    Yeah, I guess this isn't a "serious career finding site". Maybe you should tell that to these people? http://www.wallstreetoasis.com/forum/wso-success-s... Or the countless members that have stayed on Monty09's famous lucky couch and landed jobs as a result? Or the thousands of people that have thanked our team over the years for providing a fun and useful site focused on finance careers.

    Yay internet. Go back to LinkedIn and keep cold-emailing...or stay on here, build some relationships in a more relaxed and fun (OMG, networking can be fun?!?) atmosphere. You might learn something. And even end up with a solid job. Plenty of other less arrogant members have done it in the past.

    Yes, a fun "dealio" indeed.

    Welcome.

    Well alrighty then. I stand corrected. However, I am not in New York or wherever the Happy Hours are. Would love to attend one if I was. Networking opportunities, sure. Guess I'll have to shell out the $ to access the networking opportunities. I'll save up. And currently I've been utilizing my BB's career center which has been an excellent resource way out here in West Texas. Guess it's more of a locational thing for me. And I have not read the success stories, so obviously I was speaking out of turn. And I apologize. However, there are tons of other career websites that don't tolerate the vitriol we see on here sometimes. Which I attribute that to fun dealio aspect of the site. And that's all well and good because it seems to be designed that way. In my inexperience, novice, still undergrad mind, it just seems to me that if some employers came on here and saw some of the vitriol, they might not want to hire those people. And there are good people on here, for example BlackHat, who gave me some great networking advice when I messaged him one time. Thanks for the advice. I will do as such. Networking is fun! I love meeting new people and asking them about their experiences. Sometimes they don't call people shitstain though or say eff every other second. Again, thank you for the advice. It is encouraging that there are real, professional people on here, and obviously I have much to learn.

    Does Dallas or Houston have happy hours?

    whatever dude - yeah, you have to shell out $ to access networking opportunities...really? All of the forums, private messages and access to everyone on WSO is 100% free. The paid services (Wall St. Mentors, Video Library, Job Board, Resume Review, Interview Guides, etc) are to help the most ambitious job seekers out there get a leg up. I dont see anyone putting a gun to your head to force you a buy these services, but I do see over 100,000 discussions in our archives and thousands of comp data in our Company Database available for free...not to mention great users like Blackhat that give you "GREAT advice", yet in another thread you call WSO useless. Might also want to read up on what a Certified User is and read our entire FAQ section: http://www.wallstreetoasis.com/frequently-asked-qu...

    Oh, and just an FYI, Houston probably has more happy hours / dinners / etc. than any other city outside of New York (look up the Energy Rodeo). Largely because of Gene's leadership (monty09), MANY kids off of this site have gotten great gigs...the fact that you don't know this is just further indication that you haven't even given WSO a fair shot. Gene now runs a recruiting firm out of Houston called RTC Group.

    Yes, people can be assholes on here - and there are likely assholes in your office. I think we're all adults and can handle a little vitriol on an anonymous internet forum, right? (I think our mods do a great job for the record)

    You are definitely missing out. I have personally met Gene (Monty09) on several occasions and even the owner of this site (Wallstreetoasis aka Patrick) as well as many people on this forum. I live in Houston and the networking opportunities are great here. You just have to reach out man.

  • PonyUp's picture

    Our T&L allows you to expense up to $25 per meal. I've seen people buy gift cards for $25 at cheaper restaurants, then proceed to pay with the gift card.

    ... cut backs are happening for a reason.

    Invest in yourself; that's from where the real wealth comes.

  • TesticularElephantitis's picture

    Okay, I read through all the comments, and I have this to say:

    1.) I think it's a great and entertaining post.
    2.) I don't think AVP is in any way being rude or off-putting. If you can't take non-"talking with the professor"-language, you're going to be seriously held back. You need to know how to communicate with everyone, or you're going to be caught off guard when that new client that you really wanna land comes in and says something with the same tone. It's not a rude or off-putting tone - it's the way some people communicate.
    3.) If you don't expect to get any shit or hazing (you guys call it that?) when you join a new job, especially in a work environment that the stereotypical banker works in, then you're going to have a shit of a time. Yes, a shit of a time. When I got the best high school job I ever had, it was the best because of what I learned about work culture - I was hazed like the snot-nosed-little-shit I was, talked rough to, "yelled" at I think is what some people call it, - I had to earn my name, for Christ's Sake: they called me Opie for some months until I started busting my ass off consistently and kicking ass at the job.

    That's life. You gotta earn your stripes. Good for you, you have proved it to yourself - but like I said to the "Put IQ on CV?" guy, it doesn't matter if you've proved that to yourself until you prove it to others. There is a high chance that at least someone will treat you like this. If it really bothers you, first: recognize they don't mean it to harm you, and 2nd: speak very politely and honestly with them and ask them to change it up just a bit.

    Basically, wise up. If you can't handle the heat, you're not gonna make it in the kitchen.

    Nothing can stop me.

  • In reply to WreckEmFinance
    BigEasyTiger's picture

    WreckEmFinance:
    WallStreetOasis.com:
    WreckEmFinance:
    Again, this part of what makes this site a fun dealio. Most people don't know each other personally and we don't even put our real faces on the avatar, but we rip the shit out of each other or encourage or whatever, share stories, experiences. Yaaaay internet. Yet another reason I consider this site pure fluff. By no means a truly serious career finding site. More of an entertainment, residual information gathering type thing. And that's good. And that's fine. And thus, Good luck to you sir.

    Most people don't know each other personally? You mean the people that are dumb enough not to take advantage of the obvious networking opportunities on here every day and at the Happy Hours and the WSO Conference this summer?

    Yeah, I guess this isn't a "serious career finding site". Maybe you should tell that to these people? http://www.wallstreetoasis.com/forum/wso-success-s... Or the countless members that have stayed on Monty09's famous lucky couch and landed jobs as a result? Or the thousands of people that have thanked our team over the years for providing a fun and useful site focused on finance careers.

    Yay internet. Go back to LinkedIn and keep cold-emailing...or stay on here, build some relationships in a more relaxed and fun (OMG, networking can be fun?!?) atmosphere. You might learn something. And even end up with a solid job. Plenty of other less arrogant members have done it in the past.

    Yes, a fun "dealio" indeed.

    Welcome.

    Well alrighty then. I stand corrected. However, I am not in New York or wherever the Happy Hours are. Would love to attend one if I was. Networking opportunities, sure. Guess I'll have to shell out the $ to access the networking opportunities. I'll save up. And currently I've been utilizing my BB's career center which has been an excellent resource way out here in West Texas. Guess it's more of a locational thing for me. And I have not read the success stories, so obviously I was speaking out of turn. And I apologize. However, there are tons of other career websites that don't tolerate the vitriol we see on here sometimes. Which I attribute that to fun dealio aspect of the site. And that's all well and good because it seems to be designed that way. In my inexperience, novice, still undergrad mind, it just seems to me that if some employers came on here and saw some of the vitriol, they might not want to hire those people. And there are good people on here, for example BlackHat, who gave me some great networking advice when I messaged him one time. Thanks for the advice. I will do as such. Networking is fun! I love meeting new people and asking them about their experiences. Sometimes they don't call people shitstain though or say eff every other second. Again, thank you for the advice. It is encouraging that there are real, professional people on here, and obviously I have much to learn.

    Does Dallas or Houston have happy hours?

    You might want to consider looking in the mirror before the next time you start commenting on people's bad attitude. Also, you might want to learn how to properly use paragraphs.

    Also, West Texas? Thought they just had community colleges out there.

    P.S That community college thing was a joke, just thought I should point that out, since it looks like you have trouble recognizing them. But seriously, whatever school you go to is terrible, and you live in the barren asshole of America.

  • In reply to streetwannabe
    mk0000's picture

    streetwannabe:
    blastoise:
    why do we have to leave after you?

    Some of us our getting paid hourly and are only allowed to work 40 hours ....

    Haha, I was thinking about this. Today I left at 5.15pm and a guy on the elevator said "What are we paying you for to leave when we do?"

    [Reply] "Nothing"

    "....Oh... really?"

    But, fortunately I commute from Hartford CT to NYC every day (5 hr commute total) so my manager almost forces me to leave so I can get home before 8.30pm

    man that blows my mind commuting 5 hours a day. I live in the hartford area and didnt even try for nyc firms cause of the commute? What are you in college, soph/jun?

  • ming7879's picture

    i am on the bottom rung. i haven't even graduated undergrad yet. but i guarantee you i will strive to be the complete opposite of that kind of attitude when i am middle management someday. in fact, i am pretty sure it will give me a better chance of working my way to top management if i work hard enough and am gracious enough to encourage people who have the same dreams i had when i was young and naive; as of course i still am...
    http://www.goodbags2013.com

  • In reply to streetwannabe
    CoochieMane's picture

    streetwannabe:
    I get to go on a booze cruise later this month. Company sponsored. Even though my internship is unpaid, this makes it worth it. I'm getting annihilated.

    Booze cruise in a few weeks for me.

    Hard liquor, here I come.

  • KeepCalm's picture

    Double Post

  • KeepCalm's picture

    Great tips from OP.
    I think the offense it caused to some may come due to the tone, but the content is gold!

  • In reply to streetwannabe
    TonyPerkis's picture

    streetwannabe:
    Connor:
    jjcannon:
    streetwannabe:
    blastoise:
    why do we have to leave after you?

    Some of us our getting paid hourly and are only allowed to work 40 hours ....

    Haha, I was thinking about this. Today I left at 5.15pm and a guy on the elevator said "What are we paying you for to leave when we do?"

    [Reply] "Nothing"

    "....Oh... really?"

    But, fortunately I commute from Hartford CT to NYC every day (5 hr commute total) so my manager almost forces me to leave so I can get home before 8.30pm

    You have a 5 hour commute and don't get reimbursed in any way? That's fucked.

    His parents probably reimburse the shit out of him.

    Haha, yes with encouragement. Fuck off Connor, we're poor.

    Yea..not everyone has a trust fund

    I eat success for breakfast...with skim milk

  • In reply to WallStreetOasis.com
    TonyPerkis's picture

    WallStreetOasis.com:
    WreckEmFinance:
    Again, this part of what makes this site a fun dealio. Most people don't know each other personally and we don't even put our real faces on the avatar, but we rip the shit out of each other or encourage or whatever, share stories, experiences. Yaaaay internet. Yet another reason I consider this site pure fluff. By no means a truly serious career finding site. More of an entertainment, residual information gathering type thing. And that's good. And that's fine. And thus, Good luck to you sir.

    Most people don't know each other personally? You mean the people that are dumb enough not to take advantage of the obvious networking opportunities on here every day and at the Happy Hours and the WSO Conference this summer?

    Yeah, I guess this isn't a "serious career finding site". Maybe you should tell that to these people? http://www.wallstreetoasis.com/forum/wso-success-s... Or the countless members that have stayed on Monty09's famous lucky couch and landed jobs as a result? Or the thousands of people that have thanked our team over the years for providing a fun and useful site focused on finance careers.

    Yay internet. Go back to LinkedIn and keep cold-emailing...or stay on here, build some relationships in a more relaxed and fun (OMG, networking can be fun?!?) atmosphere. You might learn something. And even end up with a solid job. Plenty of other less arrogant members have done it in the past.

    Yes, a fun "dealio" indeed.

    Welcome.

    GET EM!

    I eat success for breakfast...with skim milk

  • IRRelevent's picture

    1."I have nothing to do"
    2. Leaving espn.com on the screen while an Associate is at their desk.

  • WreckEmFinance's picture

    the barren asshole of america is the largest cotton producing region in the U.S., and one of the biggest in the world. i dunno, not to mention all the oil. so yah, you know, definitely the barren asshole producing two of the most important commodities for the commodities traders to trade and most of the cotton for your 100 dollar premium cotton, tailored shirts. yaaahhh barren asshole alright. plus also cattle. lots and lots of cattle.

    "Everything comes to those who hustle while they wait."
    -Thomas Edison

  • WreckEmFinance's picture

    i love all this attention i'm getting! thanks guys! this has been fun, and enlightening. i have i learned WSO has much more to offer than i realized, and i will take that to heart, by golly. also there seems to be quite a fixation with anuses on this post. to each his own, i guess.

    "Everything comes to those who hustle while they wait."
    -Thomas Edison

Pages