A career in the financial sector will put you in contact with numerous types people and personalities. Some will amaze, others inspire but then there is the other end of the scale.
These people will piss you off, generate ire and hatred and drive you to a level of sheer disgust and disdain you thought unimaginable. These characters are the sycophants.
Every work environment has these people and they are in a world all their own....the brownest of brown nosers.
Behold some characteristics of these fabled employees, destroyers of morale, usurpers of authority, liars, backstabbers and frauds.
• Said employee is usually a dealer, not a drug dealer, but more of a candy and snack dealer. They lure the surrounding lemmings over for “free” chocolate and candy. This gives them the sense that you owe them something. That they are the dispensers of bounty. That they are in charge. But of course they are doing this precisely because they have no authority and the only thing they are dispensing is an attempt to make you resemble their own self image: helpless, overweight and eventually diabetic. If this sounds like someone in your office, this might be a sycophant.
• This individual talks a lot, about everything that has nothing to do with the actual task at hand…or even the business you are in. Anything other than actual work, for which they are paid a princely sum. They gossip incessantly at elevated volumes so every poor bastard in the entire area can hear them. They openly stab people in the back with their immediate “superiors”, who sadly chime in and encourage. But under this facade is a sad individual, a lifeless troll. If this sounds like someone you have witnessed, this is probably a sycophant.
• A person who actively sabotages their colleagues and creates a situation where an operation may not be able to function efficiently or properly in their absence is a douchebag. Or in some peoples mind, protecting their own territory. If they have a specific and personal financial interest in a highly competitive environment this could be understood in context; but as an overpaid, salaried, sugar junky? For example, on a trading desk, if a “trader” (data entry clerk) sabotages their colleague by withholding an order or pertinent information in an attempt to elevate their own reputation and false sense of self worth at the expense of their colleague(s) …..that person is most definitely a sycophant.
• When the “management” (a term one can use loosely if they hire, promote and foster such people) is away, there is a sense on the part of this person that they are in charge. The big cheese. The gossip to their “superiors” reaches ever increasing heights albeit over the phone. But of course this is a facade. They are in charge of “reporting”, or relaying useless information and on occasion a pertinent detail that allows them to ingratiate themselves with the cheque cutters. They produce nothing other than empty candy wrappers and an endless gossip the rest of the time… They are an expense in every possible way. So if you have seen someone who thinks they are “the shit” when your boss is away, even though they are technically an overpaid, glorified data entry clerk: this is the definition of a sycophant.
• One will also observe another particularly ire producing trait of this person: they are the most blatant back stabber you have ever met. Their loyalty is to favor only. If you pay them, they have their nose so far up your ass, you need birthing tongs to get away from your desk; but the minute you no longer dispense spoils to them, you are hooped. They will fuck you every which way as openly and publicly as possible. Hard to believe, but if this sounds like the sort of thing you have witnessed or experienced: you have been subjected to a sycophant.
• On occasion this employee might somehow get themselves into a “management” position. In this case their typical behavior is extremely abusive and this is a cover for the fact that they have no idea what is going on or how to do their job. They know the people below them are better paid, informed and more competent; so they yell, threaten and intimidate. The fact is however that these "managers" are dumber than a turkey, and all this bluster will never cover that up. So if you know of a “manager” who read Steve Jobs’ biography, and came to the erroneous conclusion that to get ahead, make “the numbers” and impress their superior they need to be an even bigger, dumber, fucking asshole than they already are: you most definitely know a sycophant.
The sycophant is an insidious creature and vicious when challenged or confronted. One would be best to avoid and evade at every possibility. Accept no favor, and do not allow them to ingratiate themselves with you. Your back will never covered, especially if there is nothing in it for them.
If you encounter one unexpectedly, toss a candy or some change in the corner and vacate the area as quickly as possible.
If you inherit such an “employee”, find a quiet room on the other side of the office and leave them there alone until they disappear slinking off to an unsuspecting host in another department. Or perhaps they will explode from consuming all of their toxic bounty….or drown in a sea of empty wrappers.
Although, 2 out of 3 would be even better.
Interesting, to be honest the worst types are the ones who try to ruin your career/jack up your bonus.
There are a lot of people who work on the street who are basically aspies... Lets face it a lot at the lower levels. So for the younger hires you all know this guy - the "brings up your bad points in a joking tone" guy.
In addition if you're ever annoyed/pissed off he will come over and immediately ask out loud "how you doing man you doing okay". The fake sincerity is just passive aggressive nonsense and you'll have to mentally check out so you don't stand up and punch the dude in the face. He knows you're pissed and is trying to get a rise out of you, get under your skin because he is a passive aggressive asshole.
If he ever finds out that you "messed up" on a project, he'll "jokingly" bring up this mistake on numerous occasions.
Said person generally runs around like a $10 prostitue and tries to get "friendly" with all the higher ups.
That said beyond the above sycophant for lower end employees, the worst layer in IB is usually the Vice President. These guys are up to their eye balls in stress, trying to generate revenue and manage down - try to stay on good terms but not to the point where you're seen as the "star".
Yes, yes, and yes. Reading this to myself, I can just see my old VP's face.
Dealing with this guy right now. “Jokingly” brings up my mistakes. How do you handle it?
Nice 10yr bump.
but dude...free candy
Few things are douchier than these d-bags trying to steal clients behind your back. And few things at work are more rewarding than hearing your clients endorse you & putting said a-holes back in their place.
Personally hate people that play both sides of the fence. One minute they are trashing someone, the next minute they are whispering to that same someone over the phone and having little chuckles about other people... makes me rage. In my one year, this is the one I have seen the most.
I knew this was going to be a good thread. I tend to agree more with the responses than the OP. The OP checklist is more like irritant vs. vitriol.
One other note.
One of the most under-rated, hated people in the office to have is actually... "The star" associate/analyst.
Here's the explanation.
The star follows the rule the the T. This dude will never bend the rules in the slightest. 8am entrance time? He will make it by 7:45am even after a weekend of getting cushed on live deals.
He is visibly happy to be working on any live deal, it could be a low end international deal where he has to stay up at f'd up hours and work like a dog. No worries this dude somehow makes it in on time and doesn't complain once because his job is his life. Partying on weekends? Nah "I was reading 10K's."
Why should you hate the star so much?
He raises expectations for the whole group
Sometimes the star is actually not a scycophant, but deep down we all have some slight loathing towards him. He is making us work harder and he doesn't know, or doesn't care because again finance is his life. Making top bucket is harder because of him.
Finally, the star usually burns out at the middle level because he is unable to take risks/bend rules due to his previous 5+ years of the grind following the rule book to the T.
Overall, the star can sometimes be a nice guy/non-sycophant, but deep down at one level this guy sucks because he's making your life worse by raising that bar.
? the star is usually the guy who makes MD before 30. Some people come in to do their two years and move on. Others come in with the intention of taking the place over.
It can totally suck to have a curve killer, but I think you're mistaken when it comes to thinking of such a person as a tool: they know the rules better than most and can get away with a whole lot more when they choose to.
I hate those "star" types just in general. People really forget to have fun in life and end up being one of the few people to show up at a 10-year HS anniversary just to show people how successful they are. In short: They're pussies.
UFO insider you got it mixed up. There are two types of "stars".
1) There is the workhorse star 2) Then there is the workhorse + amazing sales skills/political skill "super star" who generally does not need to grind out 100 hours a week.
There is a distinction a large one. Yes there are very very very rare people who fit option number 2. Most fit category #1.
Those in the industry know this distinction very well.
Cool story bro
You have to be careful when dealing with the stars or wannabe stars. You may think someone is your friend but...be careful of what you say around people. Be wary of the "friend" who is really a budding "star"..I've seen it happen more than once
Ha, that sounds like my boss (almost) to a tee. Glad I am giving my 2 weeks notice on Friday...
The worst colleague I've ever had is that guy who disagreed with everything I said. "Good morning," I'd say. "What's so good about it?" he'd respond. "Cold day, huh? 25 degrees with a wind chill of 20." "Meh, I've seen worse. It's not that cold." "Kerry had a healthy baby. Glad the pregnancy went well." "You mean the birth..."
And the worst part about the guy is that he was so disagreeable that he would disagree with a compliment I would give him. "Great work on that project." "Well, it was an easy deal." This guy was at the cubicle next to me and was at the same level as me (but 1 year ahead). I don't know how I worked with him for 18 months without killing him.
Oh fuck this post raised my blood pressure. Had one a couple years ahead who would argue just to argue. Even if you hit him with some knowledge and had a good point he would say something like "yeah, that's true i guess.. but i still think..." You could actually say something completely unambiguous/factually true to him and he'd disagree. Don't be this person.
Lol sounds miserable
I disparaged/ridiculed a boss over IM to a colleague at work. We were very good friends. But at one point we had a falling out. The next day he printed out my IM's with his own rude comments conveniently not included (apparently he had been archiving everything) and gave it to the boss.
100% True story.
And....
What happened from there??
Boss called me into his office. And gave a speech about corporate culture - something along the lines of "here we try to respect each other" (I called him some pretty insulting - but funny- names) and then in a very insincere way said something along of the lines of "if you have a problem with me or anyone else we can talk it out". Then he pretty much despised me for 2 months until I quit. Giving me bitch work + some sort of high school behavior where he'd ignore me when I'm talking and refrained from talking to me (even the most minute things would be sent via email). Looking back it was all kind of silly. And I spent much of the last 2 months there plotting revenge against my coworker.
You can't just end the story right there, man.
@readline
You have given a great example of something I have said numerous times on WSO: your co-workers are not your friends. Believe it people.
So true. Everyone is out for themselves. I've seen people back-stab others just because they were shining at their job.
Yeah but you spend so much time with them that you end up thinking of at least a few as friends.
Then if they stab you in the back, you think "damn I was dumb."
Good guys finish last people. Seen enough brown nosers climb the ranks at lightning speed.
It really is an art on balancing your relationships with your colleagues. You have your pals that you can "go to war with" & are a solid part of the team. On the other hand, I've seen enough examples of "people" trying to finesse their way on to your good side, only to attempt theft of your clients/business down the road. You may not notice these things when things are going well, but when revenues plummet & people are gripping their seats tighter in anticipation of layoffs, changes in behavior become more evident.
At the end of the day you just gotta realize that people are doing high finance to make a shit ton of money, making friends is not their priority. This would help justify a lot of the behaviours of people as unreasonable as it may be.
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