Style Pandemic

Over the past 20 years we have entered into a style / fashion pandemic in the field of high finance.

Once upon a time bankers were memed for prestige maxing their attire. High-end suits, ties, and shoes.

People look like shlubby chuds now.

Today people where sneakers to the office, think quarter zips are fancy, and unironically still proudly wear vests. And you wonder why you, tour associate, and VP don’t have girlfriends.

I understand there’s a complete apathy towards appearance today. Largely driven by tech influence, millennial culture, Gen Z athleisure wear, and even an influx of internationals not indoctrinated in proper western code. (I have seen some people wearing tuxedo shoes as their work shoes in the office).

Some notes:
1) Brown shoes: brown shoes are historically a no go. Especially chestnut/ walnut brown. There’s an old phrase “no brown in town” meaning professionally black shoes are the only acceptable choice (yes even with with navy suits)

2) Never button your bottom jacket button

3) Vests: these have been memed to death. I understand you want to cover up years of seamless meals at the desk, but vests make you look like a goober. It says “I want to look like a finance professional, have absolutely no sense of fashion, am most likely a squid.” To each their own. I love the finance industry, but it’s generally understood that people in the industry are not cool.

4) Wear whatever you want - none of the above truly matters. We’re living in the “after period” of the golden age anyways.

5) Synthetic Fabrics are COOKED - popularized in the 90s mostly in casual wear, it’s difficult to even find dress pants today that aren’t a synthetic bland. These fabrics drape worse, look cheaper (yes your ABCs from lulu look cheap), and spread microplastics into the blood stream. The microplastics may have caused Gen A/ Gen Z to have lower testosterone levels- which is also very apparent in behavior and demeanor.

I imagine I’ll get a lot of poorly opinionated chuds giving my monkey shits due to their own misunderstandings / fragile egos. That’s fine, they can continue flicker gooning at 3am post slop bowl delivery.