Am I a dick for gaslighting my coworker?
So I didn’t study finance in undergrad. Did engineering and then a PhD. After graduating I started working in SS ER. I’m not too well liked at my current shop but I’ve been here for less than 1 year. I think it’s because I didn’t even have to interview they just offered me without really any due diligence. It’s evident I didn’t really know what I was doing in respects to modeling or finance lingo.
I just lateraled to a MM HF (Citadel/Point72/Millenium). I know a few people at my firm who don’t particularly like me, but their dream is one of these shops. Definitely some really douchey finance bros.
They asked me how I got a job at one of these funds so soon and I said idk I never heard of this place I just applied on LinkedIn and got it. That’s not true, I busted my ass to move to the buyside, but me playing it off seemed to really annoy these guys.
Yes.
I'm not surprised that you're not well liked. Maybe it hasn't yet, but it will hurt your career eventually. There's really no upside to being an asshole to people.
Eh have you ever dealt with L/S people? They are an insufferable lot
Wondering the same thing
sounds pretty funny to me, so i vote no
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They know you're lying and think you're hiding something. A good analyst has the ability to sniff out bullshit.
Lying about…?
These guys have just been dicks so I thought it’d be funny to gaslight
This isn’t really gaslighting it’s just making a joke or messing with someone.
Gaslighting is when my girlfriend tells me she would like to have dinner with her friends and I say “sure, I’m free Saturday” then when Friday rolls around and she reminds me about the dinner I tell her “What do you mean Saturday? I said Sunday, why would I tell you Saturday when I already made plans with the boys?”
See this works because then I get to hang with the boys and skip dinner with her crap friends, while she questions her reality and sanity and thinks she somehow misheard the day.
And she'll stay cuz your a certified PE pro
And who said money can’t buy happiness?
Private equity is like a truck with big wheels and a loud engine—everyone knows who the big man is. 0 compensation at all going on.
How did you get a cool job when you said you didn’t know what you were doing at your old job?
Those hedge funds you mentioned don’t mess around.
Aren’t you afraid you’ll wash out?
Initially… it’s not hard to pick up but struggled a bit when starting.
Next time, don't leave out personal identifying information for us to look for on LinkedIn. First half of your post was unnecessary. Lol.
Hilarious story so no. And SB. Would help if you didn't use such inconsistent and confusing wording
So which shop is it? Is it the SS ER house or the MM HF (Citadel/ P72)? Have you moved to the MM HF already or have you just accepted the offer and will move soon
So the people at the SS ER firm don't like you, right? And it's because they're salty over the MM HF offer. The HF people like you, right?
Correct… guys in SS ER did not like me my be
Easy to see why you're not well liked.
That's the kinda joke that can work if you are close with the guys and not a new joiner. You sound kind of an arrogant douche tbh, check yourself before you wreck yourself, especially given how junior you are.
As funny as the Linkedin part is, yes you're a douche.
While this is funny you sound like a wanker. I'm almost betting it wasn't your recruitment process that made others dislike you lol
No, it's fine. But Id end it there bc you never want 'proving people wrong' to factor intondecision making. Im guessing they were assholes to you beserve it
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I’m confused how it comes across that way… just messing around with them.
To clarify I was saying this to people at my old firm not the HF
Don't see any issues here, OP sounds pretty based.
This is not gaslighting. Gaslighting is telling those people you don’t like that you did ABC to get a job at HF. After they busted their ass and truly followed ABC and didn’t work you told them what you actually said was XYZ and blamed them for not listening to you carefully.
Something I found irony is that those guys don’t like you and they have no problem letting you know but still have thick skin to come to you for advice. These people are too arrogant and think that you can’t figure it out. They don’t deserve your help.
It’s like how tech ppl tell IB guys they work 80 hours a month and make more than IB
always downplay and make your achievements appear effortless - it's a power move & pisses off the inquirer
don't see what this guy has done wrong tbh, its definitely not gaslighting. you don't owe anyone an explanation for how you got to HF
maybe his colleagues at his first firm were trash people and he was a good guy, we can't say tbh, he doesn't come across arrogant
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