How much does the average HF analyst make?

$75K–3M

No "average" analyst at an "average performing, unremarkable" fund, particularly in the current environment with general underperformance of the nothing special funds relative to their benchmarks, is making 1m+. Especially when you're including all the early career folks and not focusing on mid-levels and above. C'mon guys let's not put this in college kid's heads. 

$500k to 1.5m for mid senior analyst at ok fund ok performance and ok results would be my thought 

assuming ok year, $400k-1M for mid level analysts w/ some experience, $600k-$2M for senior analysts

obviously wide range...actual extremes even wider

throw in a donut or nominal bonus every 5 years for flat/down years

the average hf analyst works at some 3 man $100m aum fund making 100k/yr hoping his fund doesn't shut down

Look at median, not average. And "analyst" includes so many different levels from fresh college grad to guy with a decade of experience, so you really have to be specific here. And I was about to say a number anyway, but now that I think about it, this whole thread is just click-bait, so nuh uh, not going to fall for it, never mind.