Double or Nothing: How UBS Lost the Deal



What if I told you… you could be handed a second investment bank… and still fall behind. In 2023, UBS absorbed Credit Suisse— a once-in-a-generation deal. Two platforms. One goal: win the United States. But when the market came back… UBS didn’t. While competitors gained ground… UBS fell behind. Integration without alignment. Talent out, hierarchy in. Because in investment banking… scale doesn’t win deals. Execution does. And UBS didn’t. Double or Nothing: How UBS Lost the Deal.
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[Intro]

Look... If you had... one shot... or one opportunity...

To build the biggest bank you ever wanted... one merger...

Would you capture it? Or just let it slip?

Yo

[Verse 1]

Culture’s sweaty, MDs weak, hours are heavy

There's vomit on his sweater already, Marcos spaghetti!

He's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready

to close deals, but he keeps on forgetting

what he mapped out, the whole Street goes so loud

He opens his mouth but the deals won’t come out

He’s chokin’, how? Everybody’s jokin’ now

Three years run out—time’s up, no deals how?!

Snap back to reality—oh, there goes strategy

Oh, there goes the franchise, it choked

He’s so mad, but he won’t

Give up that easy—no, he won’t have it

He knows, his whole banks’s to these ropes

It don’t matter, he hopes

He can spin it in quotes

But the numbers expose

When he goes back to the floor again, that’s when it’s

Back in the deck again, yo, same old pitch script

He better go capture this mandate and hope it don't pass him
 

You better lose the deal in the moment—you blow it

You better never let it go (go)

You only get one shot, but you missed your chance to show

This opportunity came once in a lifetime


 

You better lose the deal in the moment—you blow it

You better never let it go (go)

You only get one shot, but you missed your chance to show

This opportunity came once in a lifetime

[Verse 2]

Deals escaping…

 

Looks like a typical Monday morning meeting, blank angry stares at the performance

 

Objectively almost every single hire was a miss. I don’t know how you honestly can miss that often if you are objectively evaluating potential MD candidates in the interview process

 

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Aliquam hic molestias omnis neque autem. Sit dignissimos ad eos rerum occaecati a. Ut et voluptate quidem nemo. Eveniet ratione illum quae ut. Voluptatem qui dolores iure vel.

Steve

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