HELP! Quit before you start?
(throwaway account for anonymity) So WSO I could really use some fresh perspective on this, as I don't know what to do.
I've been working my ass off to get into IB from a non-target, get my grades up, network like a ninja, got a MM internship last summer and liked it.
Straight after I did well in the recruiting cycle, and accepted a long term off-cycle internship offer at a BB which was set to start beginning of 2018 (my preferred choice at the time) AND accepted a FIG analyst FT position at another better BB set to start this summer (as a backup).
However, I HATED the off-cycle internship. It was a sweatshop (left the office at 3-4am on average, often later) and the people were horrible. The other interns and even some analysts voiced the same opinion. I clearly could not function properly on 3-4 hours of sleep each night but adrenaline pushed me through. Finished without an offer but with a positive recommendation.
Now weeks before starting my FT BB stint, I'm having severe second thoughts. I feel depressed and burned out, and can only think about how much I hated the off-cycle internship, and am dreading the prospect of going through this again. Also I will be moving to a new city, leaving my friends, family and girlfriend far behind. I know I do not want to stay in banking long term (not the senior banker type) and expect PE (or even any) exits to be quite difficult from my niche group.
I am considering dropping the offer and doing something completely different, although I am not quite sure what exactly. I feel that cancelling now might look better on my cv than going into an analyst stint semi depressed, burned out, and quitting after a few months. But at the same time that could be the biggest mistake I will ever make.
Anyone else found themselves in a similar situation (dreading the FT gig before it even starts)? Did it get better over time? Looking for some advice/life experience...
On a positive note, I think I might enjoy FIG, heard the people and culture there are much better and former analysts from the team told me they left on average around midnight.
You'll make new friends, your family can visit your new city (or you could always fly back home), and you'll be able to find plenty of other women to date if you're in CHI/NY/SanFran (or just keep your current gf and take the same advice I gave for family). I'd stick it out just for the exit opps and the personal growth that comes from being pushed to your limit during your analyst year(s). If you absolutely don't want to do it or if it's causing your serious issues (depression, chronic fatigue, etc.) then I wouldn't go through it. A BB name on your resume and an IB skillset can bring you a lot of things in life but your mental health isn't something worth sacrificing.
Yeah I agree, I felt fine before my internship, so guessing its something temporary. Since my group is so specific, exit opps might be a problem (many lifers in the group). Ill narrow that down to FIG for you. Would you still do it?
Bro its just an internship. You will survive and you will appreciate the benefit of a good culture if you like it. If you hate it then you know its not for you and you will have plenty of opportunities with two great resume items.
Go through with it man.
Yeah thats the thing, the gig I am starting in a few weeks is an analyst role (FIG at BB) not an internship, sorry if that wasn't clear. Hence my doubt.
Sheesh... 3am/4am on average. Assuming you got in at 9am every weekday, and about 20 hours of work total on the weekends, you were doing between 110-120 hours weekly.
I would venture to say your chances of having a more normal analyst experience (80-90 a week) are pretty high at the new BB. It doesn't hurt to at least try out the FT gig and see what happens - worst case you're getting crushed like you were at the internship, and you just quit after a month or whenever you decide you've had enough.
Yeah, I always thought those hours were bullshit... Guess the joke was on me.
If its a different BB you won't necessarily be treated the same way. You've got the offer and put in the hard work, give it a go. If you turn it down you may regret it in the future and consider it a "what could have been" type scenario.
A different firm and group can provide you with a very different experience. Team culture (people, style, approach) can make a huge difference (I.e. working 16 hours for assholes vs. working long hours as a team and when it’s needed).
Don’t worry too much about your internship experience - you can think of that as a benchmark for what you didn’t like, and use it as a gauge to figure out what you want out of a career. Give the upcoming BB role a shot, and if it’s not for you, use that experience and brand name on your resume to find something else. The alternative of turning down the offer now can make job search difficult (re: coming up with a story, timing and availability of roles, etc).
And if you’re still worried, use the time between now and when you start to talk to some ex-bankers to get a sense of how they’ve developed their career path and options available to you down the road.
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