What would you do if you couldn't see your family because of work?

Hi guys, I'm a 2nd year analyst working in NY for a BB team. I'm from Eastern Europe and on a work visa. It gets hard during the holiday times as everyone gets to see their families, even if for a weekend. I haven't seen my family since I hit the desk. Even though my firm is strong on PTO and time-off, if I fly back home I have to get my passport re-stamped from the US embassy which takes 10 - 20 days. My bank doesn't have a hugely supportive WFH policy so I fear just asking to take 10 days pto and then WFH till my passport gets back. Truthfully I'm just in a situation where I'm afraid of doing this and then getting stuck back home for longer and pissing people off. I don't have a problem with the hours and over the past year and a half the only PTO I've taken was 3 days to go see some college friends. Maybe I'm just hoping for enough days to accrue that my staffer or MD forces me to go back home, even if it is 2+ weeks but I know that that is baseless. I have had open and honest conversations with my staffer on this and he seems supportive but not to like a 'don't worry if it goes over a few days you can wfh and fill in the gap' kind of way. More like a "try to plan accordingly and make sure everything fits in the timeline you identify". I enjoy banking and do a good job and tbh this would be the only thing that would make me leave the industry as right now the only thing I'm banking on is the period between when my analyst stint ends and I join the next gig as time I'll get to go home in. There are also certain reasons why my family can't come to the states although I'd be happy to pay for it.

Comments (6)

  • Investment Analyst in PE - Other
Nov 21, 2022 - 11:12pm

It sounds like your staffer gave you a go ahead. Just chat with your MD about it too. If they don't understand the situation just switch jobs, that's ridiculous.

Separately though why would it take you 10 days to get back in the country?

Nov 22, 2022 - 1:09am
The EBITA addback, what's your opinion? Comment below:

You see your family. It matters- work/life boundaries matter. Just make your request more of a stmt than a request- you've earned it by now. 

Like the unadjusted- only with a little bit extra.
  • 1
Most Helpful
Nov 22, 2022 - 9:05am
rabbit, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Hey man, same boat here and have dealt with enough US embassy bullshit. It's time to bank any goodwill / political capital you've built up with your staffer and senior guys.

The reality is Americans / Canadians have likely never seen the inside of any embassy and DO NOT UNDERSTAND the third world bureaucracy that is the US State Department and embassies abroad. That that 10-20 days could become "I don't know when and I don't care what your emergency is". Explain the circumstances to your team, and honestly, just bank the time and go.

You have to be a bit firm here as well and insist because your circumstances are different and the reality is nobody wants to lose firepower for extended periods of time. 

Deviating a bit, but it's really easy to let small hurdles like this get in the way of seeing your family and never getting around to it. I didn't see my folks for almost the entirety of my A1 year and it's a massive regret.

  • Associate 3 in IB-M&A
Nov 22, 2022 - 9:28am

If you're a second year analyst this is totally fine. I'd say no for a first year, but you have enough goodwill at this point. Also, assuming you started in 2021 - didn't your bank go WFH for a month or more around Christmas last year with the new variant? You should know how to WFH.

Just tell them you're taking X days off to visit your family in eastern Europe and will do everything possible to return by then end of that (and you should - try to get passport stamped on day 1 of your trip) but give your teams and staffers a heads up that there's a possibility you may be forced to WFH for additional days due to visa processing time.

If it does happen that you go beyond the 10 days, you will need to be prepared to work NY time zone hours which is the only kind of shitty thing here, as you'd be working through the night in your local time zone. But hopefully that doesn't happen or is only for a few days.

Nov 24, 2022 - 10:09pm
Aerfally1, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Eius consequatur assumenda minus voluptas. Error nulla sed enim accusantium. Consequatur sequi totam incidunt qui aut in.

Fugiat quae dolor et ratione doloribus. Aliquid quisquam laborum quis quia iure voluptatem consequuntur. Totam et voluptatem autem corrupti. Iure eveniet illo vitae est dolores. Id ut eum qui nostrum recusandae eveniet.

Laboriosam aperiam ea cum libero. Earum mollitia impedit quis vitae atque ab eum. Enim sint laborum voluptate laudantium ex ab sit. Iusto est itaque pariatur vel ex. Iusto commodi reiciendis autem vitae. Tempore et qui qui eligendi.

Start Discussion

Career Advancement Opportunities

November 2022 Investment Banking

  • Jefferies & Company (▲08) 99.6%
  • Lincoln International (= =) 99.3%
  • Financial Technology Partners (+ +) 98.9%
  • Evercore (▽01) 98.5%
  • Bank of America Merrill Lynch (▲01) 98.1%

Overall Employee Satisfaction

November 2022 Investment Banking

  • PJT Partners (= =) 99.6%
  • Evercore (▲02) 99.3%
  • Greenhill (▲06) 98.9%
  • Canaccord Genuity (▲15) 98.5%
  • William Blair (= =) 98.1%

Professional Growth Opportunities

November 2022 Investment Banking

  • PwC Corporate Finance (▲14) 99.6%
  • Lincoln International (▲03) 99.3%
  • Jefferies & Company (▲04) 98.9%
  • William Blair (▽02) 98.5%
  • Evercore (▽01) 98.2%

Total Avg Compensation

November 2022 Investment Banking

  • Director/MD (10) $613
  • Vice President (38) $392
  • Associates (219) $256
  • 2nd Year Analyst (139) $163
  • 3rd+ Year Analyst (19) $160
  • 1st Year Analyst (463) $153
  • Intern/Summer Associate (88) $151
  • Intern/Summer Analyst (336) $92