Beating a Pre Employment Drug Test

Beating a drug test on a budget

originally posted by @kramertheassman. Formatted and edited for this post

I work for a reputable firm and upon my offer a couple of years ago I was very nervous about how to pass the drug test. I am not into hard drugs but do smoke the reefer 3,4,5 times a week dependant on what's going on. Doesn't interfere with work and isn't something I plan on stopping any time in the near future.

Pre-employment drug tests are incredibly easy to beat as the employer/background check company can only ask so much of you without completely invading your privacy.

How to beat the test

The supplies

  • jockstrap without the cup inside
  • 3oz empty travel shampoo bottle
  • Thermometer

You will also need to have some clean pee available within an hour or two of the test.
I bought a buddy a round of golf for his piss. He got free golf, I got a pretty sweet job, everyone wins.

The process

  1. put pee in the bottle
  2. put the jock strap on inside out and put the bottle where the cup should be
  3. TUCK IT- important because to register as a valid test the urine must be between 90-100 degrees
  4. Take a couple of practice runs to ease your mind.

Use the thermometer again to ease your mind and realize that if tucked tight enough it will stay between that range for about 2-3 hours.

It is definitely uncomfortable sitting in the waiting room but as long as you don't raise any suspicion then you'll have your own private bathroom to pee in and no one will be the wiser.

DON'T DROP THE BOTTLE IN THE BATHROOM

Recommended Reading

8 Comments
 

Interesting & glad it worked out. If I ever went this route & a buddy wasn't immediately available within a few hours of my test, wonder if I could use my dog's piss to pass the test?

All the world's indeed a stage, And we are merely players, Performers and portrayers, Each another's audience, Outside the gilded cage - Limelight (1981)
 

Drugs are bad.

"After you work on Wall Street it’s a choice, would you rather work at McDonalds or on the sell-side? I would choose McDonalds over the sell-side.” - David Tepper
 

Just want to add: the 30+ day tolerance is BS if you're not a heavy smoker. It depends a lot on your body fat/metabolism/how much you smoke, but you can be clear within a few days. It's worth buying a home test-kit and seeing if you clear before taking desperate measures like buying a whizzinator.

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