Woke up this morning to an email from a Nigerian prince offering me a VP role at Lehman Brothers’ new "Hyper-Alpha Distressed Crypto Division." Said they operate out of a WeWork in Hoboken and pay in Dogecoin and GNC protein powder.
Had to do 5 interviews, including:
- Questioning my therapist about her religious beliefs (she was somehow in the room)
- Correlation between my credit score and my girlfriend and I's sex life (very high beta)
- Exploring if I would ever steal my boss's IP address adjacent to my opinion on Indians
- How I would react if I went out on a date with a vegan 6
Started yesterday. My first deal? Underwriting an IPO for a chain of gas station bidet vending machines called “Clean Cheeks, Inc.”
AMA about breaking into finance or breaking down on the dance floor. I’m here for both.
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