KISSED MY VP… HELP!!!

Current summer analyst in M&A. My VP was showing me something on his monitor and told me to pull up a chair. I sat next to him and he was showing me something on his far monitor so I leaned in to see. Idk what came over me but next thing I know I’m moving closer to give him a kiss on the cheek.

He gave me a death stare then said “did you seriously just fucking do that” super sharply and asked me to give him some space as he was red in the face. His eyes looked like they were about to pop out of his head. All the analysts/associates near his desk stared wth their mouths open and some chuckled at me as I walked away. How do I fix this before I get fired? Am I actually fucked? I need this return offer and can’t have rumors of my actions getting around other firms.

I’m sitting at my desk rn sweating bullets and am afraid to show my face near my VP. HELP!!!!!

20 Comments
 

The europe comment is on to something. you gotta find a way to make yourself into a victim in this situation bro this is life or death. "that is just how we greet in my country" "it is a way to reduce tension when you get close to someone" "are you discriminating against my culture". 

as i'm writing this though it's dawning on me that you're almost certainly american/retarded and they all know that, so with that in mind im thinking its over. i would optimize for posting a story time on tiktok and see if you can't turn this into a career  

 

Gayer than OP

"If you don't have any enemies in life you have never stood up for anything" - Winston Churchill | "It's a testament to the sheer belligerence of the profession that people would rather argue about the 'risk-adjusted returns' of using inferior tooth cleaning methods." - kellycriterion
 

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