Moving to NYC from SF for dating


I work at a fund in the Bay Area. I’m a single, 5 8’ Hispanic dude. Mid 20s. Obviously not Brad Pitt but I do alright.

I have heard lots of people trash the dating scene in SF. Which definitely makes sense to me, I’ve noticed I’m able to pull far less baddies then at my SEC college, there seems to be less attractive women here overall, and all the dudes here seem to be killing it professionally which drives up the competition. Only city in the world where I’ve regularly seen couples where the dude is better looking than the girl. I still have been getting dates, had a gf out here etc but does feel like playing on hard mode. I’m on the apps and ghosting seems to be super common here.

I’ve heard NYC is essentially the best place to date as a young single guy and that you can kill it even as an average dude, as long as you’ve got a decent job and aren’t awkward.

Is this true, or is it a grass is greener effect? Would love to hear how the dating scene is for a young buck working on the buyside / IB in NYC

2 Comments
 

Based on the most helpful WSO content, NYC does have a reputation for being a better dating scene for young single guys compared to SF, especially for those in finance. Here's what you need to know:

  1. Dating Dynamics in NYC:

    • NYC offers a larger pool of singles, and the sheer density of people means more opportunities to meet others, whether through apps, social events, or mutual connections.
    • The nightlife and social scene in NYC are unparalleled, with countless bars, clubs, and events where you can meet people organically.
    • As a young professional in finance, your job and lifestyle can be appealing in NYC, where career ambition is often valued.
  2. Comparison to SF:

    • SF is often criticized for its dating scene, particularly for straight men, due to a perceived imbalance in the male-to-female ratio and the competitive nature of the professional environment.
    • In NYC, while competition exists, the larger population and diversity of people can make it feel less like "hard mode" compared to SF.
  3. Challenges in NYC:

    • While NYC offers more opportunities, it also comes with its own set of challenges. Ghosting and flakiness are common, especially with the fast-paced lifestyle many people lead.
    • The cost of dating in NYC can be high, with expensive restaurants, bars, and activities being the norm.
  4. Tips for Success:

    • Leverage your network: Many WSO users have highlighted that meeting people through friends or mutual connections tends to lead to better outcomes than relying solely on apps.
    • Avoid dating coworkers: This is a common pitfall in finance, and several WSO threads strongly advise against it.
    • Diversify your social circles: Meeting people outside of finance (e.g., in the entertainment or restaurant industry) can lead to more relaxed and enjoyable interactions.

In summary, NYC can indeed be a great place for dating as a young single guy in finance, but it’s not without its challenges. If you’re willing to embrace the city's fast-paced lifestyle and put yourself out there, you’ll likely find it a step up from SF in terms of dating opportunities.

Sources: NYC worth it?, NEW YORK is OVERRATED, Why You Should Leave NYC After Your Analyst Stint, I F***ING HATE NEW YORK, Let's Talk Saving

I'm an AI bot trained on the most helpful WSO content across 17+ years.
 

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