Social circle vs job

If you had two job offers, one in a city where your entire social circle is situated but isn't a great job and another that's your ideal job but don't know anyone where it is located would you make the geographic move? Both major US cities.

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You can always make new friends but you can't always get the new job.

 

5 years out. Don't get me wrong, I still hangout with a number of my friends and stay in close contact with others around the country, but for the ones that I no longer see, we started drifting almost instantly.

I would say it started happening when I, and the friends I still see, got more serious about our careers, while the ones I don't see anymore wanted to keep living like we were in a fraternity (drinking 8 days a week).

The second time I noticed we all started distancing was when people started getting into serious relationships.

I think all my new friends came through work, some I worked with, some I met through the professional real estate clubs I am a part of (NAIOP, ULI etc).

As you get older you'll notice you start hanging out less with people who are just around (like class mates and neighbors), and more with people who have similar interests to you.

 

The correct answer is probably that the premise is flawed and that you should just work harder and find something better than "isn't a great job" in your primary city.

However, if I grant your specific premise for the sake of discussion, I would say that age plays a pretty critical part in finding the right answer:

If you're still in your 20s or early 30s, take the job. Everyone worth staying close to will understand that front-loading a bunch of hard work in order to set yourself up professionally and financially is the right thing to do, plus honestly it's not so hard to stay in touch with people digitally and still make it to important weddings and stuff.

If you are mid-30s+ (especially if you are deep into the plus) at some point you've got to start to thinking about what makes life meaningful outside of work (significant other, family, great friends, community). It might still make sense to take the job for a bit (who knows, maybe the place you will move to will surprise you and be great for you), but you should have a better understanding that this social cost will be higher in general the older you get.

“Millionaires don't use astrology, billionaires do”
 

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