Note: This was a sarcastic post created to mock a poster who kept doling out standard advice for the sake of banana farming
In light of recent posts highlighting career decisions, I decided to contribute my fair share to the WSO community which has been extremely helpful to me.
Why I Chose To Become Private Equity Associate:
Because Excel Models and Water Bottles. Also did I mention megafund? Mad money dood!
You Should Consider Private Equity If...
- You like models, especially the VS variety
- You like bottle service. You enjoy the swagger you get when you pull out your credit card in front of your buddies during a night-out
- You're comfortable with Excel models and can settle for them when you don't get the other variety
- You enjoy eating food ordered through Seamless
- Your roommates are a bunch of ass-hats, so you'd rather stay in the office late than return home.
- You enjoy getting fucked in the ass by your boss.
underrated Christie Lindor
why does anyone give a fuck about these banana points
Not for the banana points, brah. It's for racking up my MS count since I give really good advice otherwise. One needs balance in this world.
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