Hi all,
I had some heavy things in my childhood, and hence think I cope with stress generally very well. I cannot remember last time I felt angry or anxious, or had any issues falling asleep.
I'm currently on the buyside with a side business. Hours is still OK (7-9), but since my girlfriend started having some health issues and I need to take care of her, I'm noticing my sleep has gotten worse.
I'm doing very well on the macro things (diet, exercise, no screen 2 hours before bed etc). Are there any tactical things you guys do to lower heartrate or make it easier to fall asleep, or fall asleep again when you randomly wake up at 4am?
Still manageable, but these things can spiral so I want to be ahead of the curve.
Maybe try ear plugs? If there is any random noise at all, I used to wake up in the middle of the night and get stressed that I couldn't fall back asleep because a random noise would jolt me back awake. With ear plugs in its all good.
getting a fan for some white noise is also an alternative. helps prevent other sounds from disrupting you during the night. I can't sleep without one
Slowly count backwards from 300. As you start, readjust your position the way a dog or cat does. Feel your breathing get slower and more regular.
Have you tried spending some time with Jack, Jim, & Johnnie?
(In all seriousness, don't do this. You'll sleep, but it won't be a good sleep)
Magnesium citrate powder and a hefty dose of melatonin before bed work for me. You also don't need to kill the screen time before bed as long as you do something like low-effort TV shows instead of forums--Just have all your screens red/yellow shift to minimize blue light a couple hours before bed. (Android and windows call this something like 'evening mode')
Potentially try a strong, soothing tea / listen to a podcast you enjoy that relaxes you / take a warm shower before bed
The biggest driver is confronting your anxiety, but of course we all go through difficult times
Maybe look into getting a really nice new mattress? One of those things where you don't realize how bad an old one is until you get a new one.
what are the good ones?
It's def pretty subjective so you'd have to see what you like but purple has always been super comfortable to me
have you considered that the cause of your sleeplessness is the health of someone you love rather than your personal habits? that can possibly be addressed by spending more time with her, therapy, talking to trusted confidants about it, and so on. I had similar issues when caring for my mother, all of a sudden sleep turned to shit, but it got better once I got my emotions off my chest
alternatively, try 478 breathing (look it up). any deep nose breathing exercises activate parasympathetic CNS and lower HR and cortisol
Thanks for the comment. I’m grateful that I’m in therapy and have a great support network. I also spend a lot of time with her, so it’s not guilt just worried. Hope you’re in a better place now.
I tried 478 breathing yesterday and slept like a baby - thanks so much!
When I had anxiety I had the same thing. Waking up after 2 sleep cycles (so at around 4-5am) being super wide awake and struggling to get back to sleep. Would have thought it's because anxiety was strong enough to overpower the light sleep at the end of my 2nd sleep cycle and wake me up.
My nightly regimen before going to sleep:
-All screens are off at least one hour before going to sleep and phone put on airplane mode
-An hour of foam rolling starting from feet all the way up to neck
-All lights off and in the dark for roughly half an hour before going to sleep (usually this is my upper body foam rolling from the previous point)
-About 10 mins of controlled breathing/meditation
-Head on pillow
Make sure the temperature is a bit low, and read before bed.
Might not work with everyone, but I've found a combination of or alternating between a guided meditation for sleep or sleep music gives me something calming to concentrate on. Seconding 4-7-8 breathing as well. Overall, having something that you can focus on until your mind shuts off is easier than letting it run wild. That being said, it still takes me a while to fall asleep so take all of this with a grain of salt.
I am surprised no one mentioned jerking off. Usually works for me.
1. Set thermostat to 68 or 67.
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