Need advice please, being succumbed to "Grass is Greener" mentality and comparing myself to others
I am 24, did 2 years in IB at a sweaty EB, got pretty burnt out and took a chill strategic finance gig at a $10bn EV private non-tech company instead of recruiting for buy-side like all my friends / peers. Gig so far has been absolutely amazing and I love the job. Around $180k all in, 35 hours a week, have not opened laptop on weekends once. I am trying to be as grateful as I can.
However, I for some reason now feel really weird that I sort of left the "high-finance" path (and is probably impossible to return to once I accepted an "outside" job like this). I am constantly comparing myself to peers who are now IB associates, PE associates making $300k+. I feel so dumb and ungrateful because all of these friends of mine after hearing about how my job literally beg for me to let them know when my team has an opening and are hiring, and how I have a "dream opportunity". I still feel though so ungrateful and wish I was on their side.
As a side note, I completely understand and acknowledge how much of a "bubble" it seems like I am in, making almost $200k with 35 hours and complaining. Its just how I am feeling and cannot help it.
Anyone been through similar feelings? Advice, thoughts? Should I just stfu?
This is just old fashioned envy with a side of rumination. In your case it's about career. For others it's who got married earlier, has the better looking spouse, smarter kids, etc. but it isn't really different. The extension of that point is that you need to figure this out on a personal level. Sure, we can answer career specific points, but you already know what we're going to say - a bunch of variations that all boil down to the pros and cons of better quality of life vs. more prestige and money. You made all of those points in your post already.
Figuring this out starts with a more clear answer from you as to "why are you envious?" That starts with what: is it prestige/respect/status, money, power, a sense of not meeting potential, some combination of the above, or something else? Figure that out first, and then figure out -why- you care about it. This is all easier said than done and may take you some time.
Once you know those answers, there's only three conclusions from there:
Hope that helps. Good luck.
Thank you, really appreciate the insight and response. Very helpful, means a lot.
If you got to IB you’re probably a very goal-oriented person. Maybe you lack a specific career goal within the path you’re on. You should try to find out what senior level you want to get to, and work towards that in your career. Public company CFOs make $2-4m per year total comp, more than most MDs, so the economic upside is there if you want to shoot for it. Or find a path that gets you to $1m with a little less stress. Having a goal is good.
Way more MDs than public co. CEOs..
Work is not the only outlet for ambition. You can be a highly ambitious person and apply that to social life, health, relationships, etc. We glorify ambition and hard work in only professional life and completely accept subpar performance in other aspects of life (health / relationships).
I would encourage you to reframe that you didn’t leave finance because you’re burned out but because you wanted to work hard and be ambitious in a more holistic manner across all aspects of your life. It’s very easy to paint a canvas black but it’s a lot harder to paint a mosaic with a variety of colors that collectively create something beautiful. It’s far more impressive and enviable to have a life that is great across a variety of categories than it is to have a life where you’re exceptional at just one thing.
Thank you, I really appreciate and respect this outlook. Makes a lot of sense.
Any tips on having an exceptional life through many outlets while staying in high finance?
It’s not that complicated in general - just do the basics really well and you’ll be further ahead than most people. Focus on improving physical health (workout consistently, cut down on alcohol, and eat healthy), mental health (go to therapy seriously - this is the first thing on this list to work on), financial health (save money and don’t inflate your lifestyle like everyone else in finance), relationships (spend time with your parents before they’re old or dead, be supportive to your significant other and make time for them), having interesting / new life experiences (travel abroad during your time off, learn a new hobby or skill (camping / skiing / hiking / climbing), read interesting books on topics other than work (history, poetry, fiction)).
I know none of this sounds groundbreaking or glamorous but the combination of being mentally healthy, physically healthy, financially solvent, having good relationship with your family, and having interests outside of work makes you a unicorn in your late 20s and 30s. To do all of these things requires a LOT of commitment, focus, hard work and especially time. Which is why I’m telling OP that you can be extremely ambitious, committed, hard working, and motivated and NOT be exclusively focused on maxing out the work / financial health variable at the expense of all others. Being a well rounded and frankly happy person is not guaranteed - you have to intentionally commit to having a holistically better life.
It sounds like with their new gig, OP has financial health covered and has more time so hopefully they’ve been focusing some of their energy and time on these other areas. If you can do all of this while maximizing your career in finance working 60-90 hours a week then good for you, but 99.9% of people can’t and need to make intentional trade offs if they want to want to maximize their overal life portfolio.
Stopped reading after 180k and 35 hours. Yes, you absolutely should stfu.
Appreciate the reality check.
At 24 too... most college grads I know are lucky to hit that by 35.
Appreciate it damn I sound so ungrateful..
No reason you cannot do growth pe, venture, credit or mmpe or hedge fund. If you wanted to. Obviously would need to be an associate
Thanks, thought once I entered corp dev / strategy I am forever stuck here. This comment of yours gives me hope thank you!!
So uh....how does one go for looking for a job like yours? Not kidding here, would be quite helpful
I got lucky and just came across it on linkedin. 3 interviews, 1 model test, was a super easy and chill process. Did not know the job was so light work and pay was so good until my offer letter came in and I started working and entire senior team was leaving at 4 pm lol
Can I ask what industry the role is in?
too late for you now but i also encourage people to go for PE after IB, because you only regret the things you didn't do
Dont think its too late at all. Have around $9bn of deal value closed from IB and $4bn at my new job now. Obviously 0 chance for MF or good UMM but i was never going to target those anyway / dont want to.
tough, you can easily go back to IB but PE hmmm, need more work to do!
Debitis et cumque repudiandae qui libero quas sint. Autem dolores ullam fuga.
Quisquam mollitia placeat in fugiat et at rerum commodi. Assumenda id officiis commodi nihil dicta. Dolor qui debitis adipisci mollitia. Quis ipsa non repellendus magnam. Modi ipsam dolorum consequuntur. Fuga quo porro deserunt consectetur amet sit iusto.
See All Comments - 100% Free
WSO depends on everyone being able to pitch in when they know something. Unlock with your email and get bonus: 6 financial modeling lessons free ($199 value)
or Unlock with your social account...
Reprehenderit vero nihil est sit at nostrum. Rerum voluptate nulla molestiae atque omnis sint consequatur. Accusantium ea doloribus maiores. Accusamus quas voluptatem qui nulla dicta. Enim pariatur voluptate error quo rerum.
Rem porro enim reprehenderit eaque nisi enim. Neque fuga quia dolorem id error maxime. Velit placeat nostrum tempora qui ullam ex neque. Possimus fuga sequi autem et.
Accusantium recusandae necessitatibus dolorem deserunt sunt sit. Minima minima earum autem veritatis. Qui quia mollitia sapiente voluptatem.