This is borderline psychotic and not normal at all in PE right?
Just started at a UMM couple months ago and everyone here is just robotic, weird, super hardo, and dead inside. They have an absurd rule that employees must follow:
You know on Microsoft teams you have your status? Green, yellow, but you can set to purple and leave a message? It is required for all employees if you are gone for 10+ minutes, you must set your status to purple and leave a message for why you are away, required.
At around 7-8pm everynight, the entire team is purple and messages will say:
At Gym
Taking a Shower
Cooking dinner for kids
Helping kids with homework
How insane is this? I want to leave finance altogether...
I worked at one of the sweatiest PE firms on the street and even this is insane and hard to believe
Things that never happened
Fairly standard for the industry - at my shop, if we leave our desk to take a dump, we need to provide a relevant Teams status ("ghost poop / no wiping required, back in 5min" vs. "messy multi-wipe, need 20min"). Fund performance is VERY good though
Read this in the Decent PE Guy voice.
OP - don't forget to update your status to "being an overpaid, whiny little bitch" each time you refresh the thread!
So judging based off your response you think this is 100% normal and completely fine and not toxic in a work environment? Wow all I can do is laugh at you in the face man, god bless the juniors that work under you. I'm sure you are very pleasant and have a lot of friends and hobbies! What a loser hahahah
"Wahhh I don't like where I work, I get paid >8x the median income but boss man wants me to update my Teams status! So unfair!"
Loser
Setting the bar at 10 mins is a bit much, but I think it could actually be beneficial to do this for every timeslot you'll be away that's longer than... at least 30, maybe 60 minutes.
Found his managing partner
Piss off. Maybe this is needed for a consulting firm full of 21 year old knuckle heads who can’t read time but it’s insane in a professional environment
Some of the responses here are kinda weird lol can’t tel who’s trolling
The only objective answer here is that that is absolutely batsh*t out of control insane. To the point where I don’t really believe it.
I work at $2-4B MM PE that is fairly hardo in reputation. And the thought of doing that is laughable / unfathomable. Theres no scenario in which I would ever do that. It doesn’t even make sense. And I wouldn’t even have time/energy to be updating something like that.
Would love to know which firm lol
You'd be surprised. My old VP in banking at a euro BB would message me if I was on yellow for more than 10-20 minutes. And we had a spreadsheet tracker in our group to highlight what we accomplished each day. Huge micro manager. Was why so many of us left 1 yr in
I honestly thought that kind of behavior was normal until after I left
What happens if you don’t comply though? If it’s makes you want to quit then you don’t have anything to lose anyway…?
Name and shame the firm. Way to treat your employees like children.
Does everyone log when they are asleep too…? I don’t believe this is real, that is how absurd it is
This part is where I call into question the authenticity.
Agreeing with others in this thread, this is Big Brother type behavior. If they truly can’t trust you for some reason and need to know where you are at all times, then sure. But otherwise this just looks like a control tactic and other than maybe sprinting towards the end of a deal to sign, there isn’t really a huge need to always have this. We all need some boundaries.
This is so toxic I would GTFO ASAP
No way this is real lol
"Code Brown"
This has got to be a troll post. How do you get anything done when you’re constantly worried about making sure your status message is right? Do you have to say “talking with coworker XYZ about ABC” when problem solving something together?
I get it for team if they need people at their desk asap -to ensure coverage for an absolutely critical function that absolutely requires someone present. But that would’ve been weird for every role I ever had. I get when a meeting is dragging into another but aside from that. Seems lame.
There’s a word for that. It’s called shift work. There is a clear start and end time with defined breaks
What if someone's getting laid?
Luckily they won’t be hitting that 10 minute threshold
Obviously this is wild but, the high level theme here is very commonplace in the industry which is the intentional creation of a terrible lifestyle to get people to leave so you don’t have to fire them / tell them you aren’t giving them the carrot you dangled for years — part of the game
In general if you aren’t the person raising the money and you aren’t the absolute number one superstar of your group / level then usually the person raising the money would rather you leave than overstay your welcome
“It’s always been a pyramid this thing of ours”
Money goes up, shit trickles down. Since time in memoriam.
Just change your status to Brown with "explosive diarrhea". No one will bother you.
PE is quite awesome haha
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