Please help edit my cover letter (IBD)
Hi guys,
I would really appreciate some feedback on my IBD cover letter. Thank you in advance, and feel free to be harsh!
| Attachment | Size |
|---|---|
| WSO Cover.doc 33 KB | 33 KB |
Way too long in my opinion. Focus on why you're the best candidate and conveying a strong desire to work in finance.
dude. cut this in half. no one is going to read all that
high-level comments: - "dude. cut this in half. no one is going to read all that" - They don’t care as much about why GS, so you can scratch half of the "why GS" paragraph. They also don’t care why you want to work for them (except the fact you want to do deals). they want to know what you can do FOR THEM - More results. “I was a leader and implemented XYZ project that accomplished X” - no complicated words / fancy english rhetoric. (in banking terms, "distill" is complicated, and NO rhetorical questions.)
PM-ing you with specific comments / edits. i'm doing this really quickly at work, let me know if you have any questions about what i wrote
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