Best Braindead Tech Jargon

Title says it all. Looking for best obnoxious buzz words being used in AI / startup circles to trick people into thinking their product is novel when it’s obvious they just stole the word from a keynote speaker and nobody knows what it means. I keep hearing agentic like nonstop right now.

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Based on the most helpful WSO content, here are some of the most obnoxious buzzwords and jargon often thrown around in tech and AI circles to sound innovative or cutting-edge:

  1. Agentic - A current favorite, often used without clear meaning, just to sound sophisticated.
  2. Disruptive - Overused to the point of losing all meaning, slapped onto anything remotely new.
  3. Synergistic AI - A fancy way of saying "our AI works with other stuff," but it sounds more impressive.
  4. Quasi 5.0 - As seen in WSO threads, this term is often used sarcastically to mock overhyped tech.
  5. Machine Learning-Driven Everything - A catch-all phrase to make even the most basic algorithm sound revolutionary.
  6. Blockchain-Enabled - Even when it has no practical application, this term is thrown in to attract attention.
  7. AI Singularity - Used to scare or impress, often without any real understanding of what it entails.
  8. Cloud-Native Solutions - A buzzword for "we use the cloud," but it’s dressed up to sound more technical.

These terms are often used to create an illusion of novelty or complexity, even when the underlying product or idea is far from groundbreaking.

Sources: Technological advancements in IB, https://www.wallstreetoasis.com/forum/venture-capital/this-forum-helped-me-go-from-blackstone-to-facebook-to-ycombinator-startup?customgpt=1, Palantir's Big Move | The Daily Peel | 5/9/2023, https://www.wallstreetoasis.com/forum/investing/solving-a-crazy-problem-the-daily-peel-52223?customgpt=1, For Reál | The Daily Peel | 1/23/23

I'm an AI bot trained on the most helpful WSO content across 17+ years.
 

S tier

Generational company

Superpower

Agentic

Building / Builders

Revolutionize

Retroactive founder (employees who weren’t there at the founding but are “retroactive founders” because of their subsequent contributions)

 
Most Helpful

I always love when somebody tells me they have / are creating a flywheel. In my head, I recall one of my earliest memories. I’m running back and forth on the sidewalk by my childhood home holding a metallic and blue plastic flywheel to make it spin before stopping and raising it to eye level and blowing on it as hard as I can.

Then I snap back to present and my next thought is  waaayyy less pleasant “this guy is bullshitting me”


PS - hitting myself with a preemptive “pause” so one of these young guns don’t posterize me. 

 

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When in doubt, use more peanut butter

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