Stupid things you did to cost you a job?

took a nap in my car trunk (hatchback, quite spacious) during lunch and random times and got caught on security camera in parking garage. This was an internship early in college when I did a lot of stupid shit.

^That's pretty good lol.

Showed up to the interview and realized I'd forgotten to shave. Since I was early, I bought disposable razors from the Duane Reade across the street, and then shaved using the rear view mirror. I cut myself pretty badly and showed up to the interview bleeding.

From the moment the receptionist saw me things went downhill.

Clicked read on receipt on an email -- never, ever did this before in my life. Made me seem arrogant/pompous to what was an otherwise an easy network-in to MBB consulting.

I was so pissed that I re-coded the mail portal (Squirrelmail) and removed those buttons from webmail.

I actually ended up getting this job, but I thought it was worth mentioning because of the horrified looks on the faces of my interviewers.

Showed up for the interview for Regional Sales Manager job with no resume. When they asked to see my resume, I handed them my last 3 years of tax returns and said, "This should answer the 'How full of shit am I' question you might be asking yourself right now."

This was for a really straight-laced company and I was interviewing with the CEO and VP of Sales. The VP of Sales started laughing but the CEO was horrified. I don't think I've ever seen an executive look that uncomfortable. We (the CEO and I) eventually became pretty good friends, and we even shared a couple real estate deals with each other. Ultimately I got fired, though, because I just wasn't controllable (this was something I actually explained to them in the initial interview and told them that if I got the job I would probably be fired for it eventually, but I guess they didn't believe me).

Some people are just incapable of being employees.

A coworker once showed up so hung over that he passed out in his cubicle. When his boss came over to talk to him, he woke up and immediately vomited all over his desk. Was fired at the end of that week. Ended up getting a job at a more prestigious firm for more money so the lesson, as always, is drinking comes first.

when i was a college senior, back before i owned a smartphone or a GPS, i landed an interview at Raytheon's El Segundo campus (Southern California) for an internal finance role. i left early, making sure to jot down directions that i got from Mapquest. i didn't bother writing the address, thinking that i would see a large "Raytheon" building, find parking, and get there with time to spare.

what i didn't realize was the Raytheon "campus" was more like "Raytheon City"... seemed like several square miles and literally dozens of fucking Raytheon buildings. i don't remember how i finally found the right place, but i was 45 minutes late (and of course i didn't bother to jot down the phone number so i could call and ask).

didn't get the job.

Cold emailed an MD from a small boutique, was doing a lot of emailing at the time. Forgot to change the firm name from the previous email I'd sent to a different MD.....