This is HANDS DOWN the ULTIMATE career path. Noone DARE disagree with me.
After hours of experimenting the lab, I have come up with the ULTIMATE career path. Now before I go out the publish a book on this amazing discovery, I thought sharing some of the bananas might be a good idea. So here it is:
1. Enter the investment banking division of a bulge bracket bank, preferably an industry group over a product group (recommended: TMT, healthcare, Nat Res).
2. Career path: 3 years analyst -> 3.5 years Associate -> VP
3. Now at this point, a lack of an MBA might hurt a bit so enroll at Columbia EMBA (if you work at NYC) or Wharton EMBA (if you're at Cali/SF).
From point this on, it's all smooth sailing (get married, send your kids to private school etc.)
Now before you all start jumping on like in my last post (see: remaining in HLHZ), let me explain to you the reasoning behind why it is the "ultimate".
1. Contrary to what most people assume, getting a direct promote from analyst -> associate -> VP is not that difficult. The associates that get laid-off are usually career switcher MBAs who entered IBD because of the money and prestige and end up sucking big time. Those who stick it out (especially from analyst) know how the game is played and getting to at least the VP level is quite a standard procedure. (THIS IS FOR BB BANKS, DOES NOT APPLY FOR BOUTIQUES)
2. Once you reach the VP level, the lifestyle becomes very manageable. Grunt work is practically non-existent (the analysts/associates will be doing that), lifestyle is from 9am ~ 7/8pm and majority of work beyond those times (including weekends) can be done via blackberry from home. The media and WSO talk about how investment bankers are "enduring hell" - keep in mind this is for analysts and newly-minted MBA associates, NOT VPs.
3. If at all one feels the need of a "network" or has prestige issues, the EMBA at Columbia/Wharton is an option - admission standards are much lower and they both allow you to tap into their strong finance networks. Yes, people argue that EMBAs are useless due to a lack of bonding, but really, 5 years after you graduate from the MBA, everyone gets distant and your "MBA network" slowly dissipates. What remains, however, is your MBA Brand, hence is the reason why an School brand (M7) is so important. Just an example: Jamie Dimon, how many people from his Harvard MBA class do you think he still "keeps in touch" with?
4. Your career progression is much faster if you remain at one firm for a long time. Instead of fooling around a couple years (4~6 years), working your ass off for an MBA then entering as a post-MBA associate (whether in IBD or PE), why don't you just remain and move up the ranks? Here I calculated it:
Graduate college (age 22) -> IBD 2 yrs (24) -> PE 2 yrs (26) -> MBA (28) -> post-MBA PE associate
Graduate college (age 22) -> Analyst 3 years (25) -> Associate 3.5 years (28) -> VP
Results?
1. By age 28, the PE person = associate, IBD person = VP
2. PE person is in debt (due to paying for MBA). The IBD person has at least $300k saved up and won't lose out on opportunity cost if he chooses to pursue an EMBA (since it's not full time)
3. Lifestyle of a PE Associate >= Lifestyle of a BB VP. Similar work hours; lifestyle might have an edge to PE associate if they're in a non-NY city (ex. boston).
Did I just make the greatest revelation or what? I'll be expecting at least 1 SB from each person reading these beautiful words of wisdom.
come again?
Don't comment here if you have nothing good to say
You've learned all this from your college dorm? pretty impressive.
Thank you! It was a bit difficult at first, but nothing hard dedication can't overcome!
Thank you for wasting your time writing this. I will be looking forward to your future monkey shit.
99% sure that Crucifix is trolling, but this is actually a pretty common viewpoint in Asia, where direct promotions to Associate are quite common.
I'm actually very serious about this ..
I see your caps lock still sticks some-- shame.
You missed slaying young tail in your equation. C- for effort
And the HF guy is retired and never went home past 8pm. This may be the retarded thread I've seen on wso.
Watch and listen very carefully to the last 45 seconds of this video:
the idea of analyzing and planning out a boring finance career like this is terribly depressing to me.
yea more depressing than your current unemployment
OP you suck.
Telling people not to comment if they don't have anything good to say? This whole thread has nothing good to say.
Glad you are enjoying yourself OP.
Troll is successful.
A lot of effort for an unfunny troll post.
my ultimate career path would be avoiding your untalented ass at all costs
^ Don't be jealous when I'm able to send me kids to private schools while you are still searching for "exit opps" LOL
Could you please provide a DCF of each life path so we can compare?
How about I shove my arm up your mouth?
I went to private school and my parents are filthy rich. It's actually quite easy to afford. All you need to do is live in a town with low taxes and bad school, you'll get a better house and still be able to send your kids to private school.
I knew from the title of this thread that the OP would either be showered in SB's for a wonderful troll attempt or buried in a giant monkey shitstorm for actually putting forth a delusionally serious post. I was not disappointed.
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