Women of WSO - is this true?
it has been said that women look at the profiles of men on Tinder / Bumble not thru the lens of "is this guy hot....do i want to have sex with him based on his looks"....but rather, "does the entirety of his pictures, including not just his face/body, but his surroundings and social cues that i can discern from everything in the picture, make me think he leads an interesting life...and would i have fun with him, based on all the info i can discern from his pictures."
From the male point of view...this makes no sense...there is no way for people to really convey all that information thru a couple pictures and a few lines of profile text....and yet, that is exactly what women try to do, and how they mostly make their choices on Tinder/Bumble.
Also, the few guys who ARE aware that this is how women judge male online profiles can fake all that stuff to trick the women into creating a false narrative in their head...to skew the matching results.
So, my question...is this how you, and women you know, actually judge the profiles of guys on the dating apps....or is there another way that you pick?
Most guys, as you know, are pretty clueless when it comes to these things...mostly because men don't do the same thing....men mentally remove all the clutter from a girls picture and ask "is she hot ?"
Conversely, woman want men to see them for more than just their looks (which is why an opening message from a guy to a girl that says "you're hot..lets go out" usually doesn't work)...and men want women to see them as
(1) hot
(2) their hero
which is why if a girl says to a guy on tinder "you're so hot...you're my hero...lets grab drinks" she will see very high conversions from matches to dates.
Men and women think differently..as this picture suggests
This is the male perspective.....but what are your female thoughts?
Absolutely, when I was on the online dating scene (as a male), it was common knowledge that you needed to not only have action shots of you doing activities, but also have photos with other girls. These things provide social proof that you aren't a loser. You also need to have a description that has jokes in it. This makes it seem like you don't take yourself too seriously and just like to have fun. Women are 100% emotion and status driven. No bathroom selfies.
Are you a woman now?
Disagree, when I see a guy s pic with girls, I will be thinking ugh he might be a loser to be surrounded by many women ! - Gayish
Also if he has pic with babies/kids...I just freak out and say omg ! with a kid too ? no !
I'll continue to take bathroom pics. No better way to flex than a selfy with a luxurious bathroom that screams money, class, and taste.
Humor is good.
False. #1 rule of online dating: be attractive. #2: don’t be unattractive
I'm not a girl but I have to respectfully disagree. I'm very introverted and it shows in my pics but I still get alot of matches and have had success from the app. Tinder is purely based on attraction on both ends. I've found that being somewhat non-chalant with your pictures and not being a tryhard (gym/body pictures, professionally taken pictures,etc) helps a bit.
I am a girl and I will be honest; we girls value status !
so, the school you went to ! your job ! are the main factor...sometimes across average looking guys but still swipe right because I would be interested in a smart/convo also viewed highly !
a hot guy is another exception, we might swipe right if he is so good looking, but in NYC, we learnt it is quite difficult to land a hot - model type of guy....they got models etc...although I do not believe NYC has the hottest girls ! smartest yes but that is it !
as for activites and background and quality of pics as well if he travels or play golf is super important...I traveled to 5 continents and I will not date a guy who never been out of the country ! there is certain requirements...
Although, every girl might be different, some just look for funny ! not me !
The picture was so funny.
I think girls like humor, and most of all, someone who takes an interest in them, listens, engages (asks questions, etc.). I think clues as to who you are honestly is better.
Tinder is like a used car lot - so much b.s., and you really don't know what you're getting. Curated nonsense. Puffery is going to be a fail. Just try to get a conversation started and see if there's a connection.
Women are suckers for charisma. Shtick. Even an ugly guy can be quite popular with charm and personality. Some girls will like you, some won't. Just find the girls that like you, end of story, don't over think this.
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