Bonus Bananas June 17, 2011

Sorry for the delay this morning, gents. My youngest graduated kindergarten today, so my presence was obligatory. Enjoy this week's bananas:

1) If Greece Defaults on Their Debt, These Countries Are Screwed (Wall Street Cheat Sheet) - Greece is the big story at the moment, and this is a handy infographic outlining the exposure of various countries to Greece's toxic sovereign debt. Greece owes the U.S. $1.8 billion, far less than they owe France and Germany ($19.8 & $26.3 billion, respectively), but a Greek default could still kill the U.S. economy.

2) What Armageddon Could Look Like (TheStreet.com) - CNBC wild man Jim Cramer presents an uncharacteristically sober (and sobering) view of what a Greek default could do to the market. Go to Page 2 of the article for his bullet points. And you'll understand why I said a Greek default could destroy the U.S. economy in Bonus Banana #1.

3) How Ignorant Are Americans? (Newsweek) - This really shouldn't have shocked me, but it kinda did. Newsweek gave the American citizenship test to 1,000 American citizens, and only 62% passed. This is dispiriting to me, because I passed the test at age 9 when I became a U.S. citizen. It ain't rocket surgery. The article goes into a bunch of other shit we don't know, either, and how that ignorance puts us at a significant competitive disadvantage. Idiots.

4) Financial terrorism suspected in 2008 economic crash (The Washington Times) - This might keep you up at night. We in finance are well aware of the vulnerabilities in our economic system. Now an in-depth defense analysis is suggesting that terrorists or hostile nations at least profited from the 2008 crash, and may have even had a hand in it. Excellent treatise on economic warfare; check it out.

5) MBA Jobs: Post-Crisis, a Brave New World (BusinessWeek) - The jobs landscape for recent MBAs has certainly changed over the past couple years. Obviously hiring in the finance sector has declined, but other sectors (most notably tech) have rushed in to fill the void. Perhaps a much needed re-balancing of commercial priorities is afoot. In any case, here's what you need to know about the job market for MBAs.

6) Too big not to despise (Christian Science Monitor) - Josh Brown of The Reformed Broker hits the high notes of M&T Bank CEO Robert Wilmers's op-ed detailing the differences between the TBTF banks and just your average regional bank. Josh concludes (correctly) that the TBTF banks aren't banks at all. They're just hedge funds with branch offices.

7) The Economy Is Now Immune to Keynesian Crack (Real Clear Markets) - The latest from Peter Schiff. He predicts another recession (no surprise there), and he points out that the Fed can either stick to their vow to end quantitative easing and crater the economy, or they can back-track and hit the economy with more stimulus - which it will promptly ignore and crater anyway. Geez, who let Buzz Killington in?

8) Eighty-one Years. Seventy-nine Movies. Two Oscars. Not One Bad Performance. Is Gene Hackman Retired From Acting? (GQ) - Great profile of one the best actors ever. Also one of the hardest working. I remember when Gene Hackman was cranking out three or four movies a year, and they were all great. He's right up there with Paul Newman and Robert Duvall as my all-time favorite actors. I'll bet he'd be awesome even at 81. What's your favorite Hackman flick? If I had to pick one it would be Uncommon Valor, but he's had so many great roles. Lex Luthor? Popeye Doyle? Little Bill Daggett? The dude was a machine.

9) A Slacker's Video Guide on How to Tie Ties (Wisebread) - Tired of the boring old Windsor knot? Here are video tutorials to teach you the Half-Windsor, the Four-In-Hand, the Pratt knot, and how to tie a bow tie. Change it up a little, Poindexter.

10) The Banking Emperor Has No Clothes (NY Times) - Simon Johnson takes the gloves off in this skewering of Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner. He takes Geithner to task for his selective memory, his flawed logic, and the fact that the Treasury Secretary recently blamed the financial crisis on a lack of derivatives regulation - in Britain. The balls on that guy.

I've actually got two videos for you this week. The first one is the trailer for the movie version of Michael Lewis's Moneyball. To be honest, I wasn't sure how they were going to make the book into a movie, since it was predominantly about baseball stats. But the trailer looks really solid and the NY Post is already saying Brad Pitt might be looking at an Oscar. Let me know what you think:

The second video is just one that almost made my piss myself laughing. I saw it for the first time about a month ago, and then a friend of mine posted it to Facebook last night and reminded me of it. Animal Planet needs to get in touch with this guy, like, NOW. I see a whole new series of Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom:

Have a great weekend, monkeys!