Critique My Cover Email/Letter

Dear xxxx,

Please accept this email as an introduction. I served our country for four years and am seeking an opportunity in the Veterans’ Integration Program. As an aspiring analyst, I feel strongly that I possess the necessary qualifications to be a valued member of Goldman Sachs.

Throughout my tenure with the Coast Guard, I was able to develop paramount communication and team collaboration skills. As an operations and communications specialist in my division, I played an integral role in confiscating 1,700+ pounds of co***ne worth $25+ million. During our deployments, I analyzed intelligence to construct 50+ highly classified Power Point presentations. I presented these Power Points regularly to senior officials. My role in the Coast Guard enabled me to cultivate my communication, collaboration and analytical skills which are essential for all bankers to possess.

To further develop my financial modeling skills, I am enrolled in an intensive course at the Investment Banking Institute in Boston which includes accretion dilution, fully-integrated financial statements projection, leveraged buy-out, merger modeling, and valuation analysis. This experience, combined with my dedicated work ethic and military background makes me an ideal candidate to join Goldman Sachs.

I have attached my resume for your review. I am available to meet with you at your earliest convenience. Please feel free to call me at xxxxxx. Thank you in advance for your time and consideration. I look forward to your reply.

Sincerely,

xxxxx

Enclosure: Resume