How do you fart in IB?
Hey guys,
I work in a UMM IB (JEFF / Leerink / Stifel / RJ / Nomura) and currently am seated in a cubical. However I am looking to lateral and I'm afraid that other banks have a more open style seating arrangement.
Currently I'm able to rip one without anyone hearing (due to loud HVAC vents above me) or smelling (due to a cubical layout).
For those of you that have more open desk seating arrangements without dividing walls, how do you break wind without the person beside you smelling? I'm afraid I might be placed beside a cute analyst/associate and she/he will be repulsed by the swamp smell.
Thanks
TLDR, What's your farting situation and how do you do it undetected?
I tend to keep a ziplock baggie at my desk on the trading floor. Usually when I feel the gurgle I tend to fart in the bag and then immediately seal. Then I’ll bring it home and take a big huff later.
Kidding. Just go to the bathroom and let one rip
Yes that makes sense, although it sounds tricky having to apply the bag and ensure a tight seal.
But what if you need to rip multiple times? It seems unfeasible going to the bathroom constantly, especially if its far from your desk.
This but I try to capture other people’s farts and pleasure myself to them in the company restroom
(I am on strike two with HR)
Wait until you’re in a client meeting to let it out. It asserts dominance and showcases your confidence
Bump, really been struggling at this - couldn't find any guides. Thanks!
If I feel it’s a big one then I’ll go into my MD’s office and stand up on his desk, turn around, and let it rip to assert dominance.
Lowkey a valid concern
I agree with you! Wish others would give me advice on how to navigate this. It's impossible that I'm the only one ripping stinkies in the office.
Alias quo autem sit sit autem quasi praesentium accusantium. Et unde voluptas nihil nam accusantium soluta.
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