Using a parallel to obscure identifying details, but the underlying situation is accurate.
Imagine joining a bank as an associate in Industrials M&A. You have relevant finance experience and expect to work on transactions, build your execution skills, and gradually get more client exposure.
Instead, your boss has you coding random internal tools in Python. You get almost zero deal work, while other juniors are getting staffed and developing the experience you joined for.
You’re not above coding or doing grunt work. But this has effectively become your entire role, despite it not being your background or the career you signed up for.
The instructions? “Play with the code” and find something that makes the team look good. No written goals, defined output, success criteria, or deadline for the broader assignment. Your boss acknowledges that the instructions were deliberately vague.
Then she tells you she’s disappointed you haven’t produced what she wanted.
The one time she gives you specific instructions, you deliver something she likes. A more senior banker pulls you into another project, gives you context and deadlines, and you deliver there too. Every explicit deadline you’ve been given, you’ve met.
You ask about getting actual deal experience and a path toward advancement. The answer is to focus on the coding and revisit the conversation in six to twelve months. Meanwhile, your peers are getting the experience their titles suggest they should be getting.
That’s the parallel. The actual business and assignments are different.
I’m about six months in, and this has made me depressed. I’ve stayed late and worked weekends when almost none of my peers appear to be doing the same, but I feel like I’m putting time into something with no agreed finish line while falling behind professionally.
I also need to own my side: the disengagement is starting to show. I’m on my phone more and taking longer breaks from the desk. I know that hurts my credibility and gives my manager something legitimate to criticize. I’m not pretending effort or frustration excuses it.
Now I’m worried about getting below “meets expectations” at year-end, potentially making an internal move harder. I don’t know how to defend my performance against an expectation that was never clearly defined.
I’m considering asking HR for guidance on documenting expectations, the review process, and internal mobility. I’m nervous about escalating something that could be viewed as a disagreement over management style. I’m also looking externally and have found opportunities much closer to my experience and interests.
Would you:
- Try to salvage this by getting explicit deliverables and performance criteria in writing?
- Consult HR before the review?
- Prioritize leaving for a better-fitting role externally, even after only six months?
And give it to me straight: where does “an associate should be able to handle ambiguity” end and “your manager hasn’t defined the job but is disappointed you haven’t read her mind” begin?
