Think I'm fucking up my analyst years

In my opinion mid-level/senior bankers will sometimes be a little harsh when giving directions or feedback, but I would typically just say it’s either A) They’re stressed or B) putting extra pressure gets more work out of you.

Don’t take it personally, just keep giving it your best and you’ll be good. The fact that you’re posting on here shows you care; you’d be surprised as to how many people don’t care and try to get by with the bare minimum.

Don’t take this personally serious. Knew a guy who was bottom bucket An1 and Top An2 once he got the hang of things. As long as you are working hard that’s what matters

How does one make mistakes being proactive and taking ownership? I think what they are trying to say is to up manage.

It's normal to drink for the hose at first so no worries there.

You sound exactly like me. I was so over my head and felt like the dumbest kid in the room 24/7. No joke everything I was asked to do I would not know how lol but constantly looked at prior templates, prior work etc and just sort of copied it. I had a great attitude and personality and survived and got top bucket somehow twice in a row lol even though I guarantee you i was probably rank 7th worst out of 7 in my analyst class. 

It sucks too because I felt so bad when people were staffed with me, I would apologize constantly for not understanding something quickly, not getting something correct, etc. I was genuinely trying my best and can understand the flak if I was just treating it as a 9-5pm and logging off and not caring at all. I was genuinely putting in 100% effort and working late nonstop etc. Try to get out of your head, easier said than done. 

If it makes you feel any better, I’m in your exact shoes (AN2 at a reputable shop) and I feel the exact same way about myself and have had similar feelings from my reviews. I was talking to my VP today about this and he said it just takes time to get the sense of when to rush v. take your time, etc.

One big thing to know, a good chunk of the time the difference between an okay and really good analyst is just politics. Back in my analyst years, I used to sit next to the top bucket analyst on my team during my 2nd year. I thought he must never make mistakes. Instead it was the opposite, he made some big mistakes and sometimes the same type of mistakes again. 

But because he went to the undergrad that the group loved to pull from and he was better friends with some seniors, more of his mistakes were not brought up in reviews or he just got a pass. My mind was blown.

You learn that some analysts are more judged on what they do right while others are judged on what they do wrong. Most analysts are around the same ballpark. Don’t take it too seriously, learn what you need to learn to perform in your next role and go on with life. 

I have talked to multiple MDs who said they went from getting treated like a crappy analyst to being highly regarded just from changing groups or banks sometimes even while they performed the same. 

You are smart enough, but it may just take you more time to get caught up to speed. You’d be surprised, I knew some analysts that I thought were never making mistakes but they definitely were, many of which were less self aware. But if you don’t enjoy the job itself, that can always make it harder to get caught up. Life is too short to pursue a career that may not align with your personality/strengths. There are a lot of people spending time in a career that isn’t suited for them. Again, it’s not that you can’t do the job, it’s that it may not be something you actually like/are excited about which can make it harder to do the job. 

I have been thru the same shit and I am second year right now. Don’t let your confidence get shaken, that’s what causes more mistakes. If you make a mistake, take accountability and do your best not to make it again. Also, don’t be reactive when you fuck up, take it as a matter of fact and keep pushing. Do you use AI to check your work? We gave rogo at my bank and I use it for a quick final review and you will be amazed how many small things it catches. You are doing fine bro, take a breather and believe in yourself. You are not as bad as you think.

Have had the same sentiment / thoughts throughout my career thus far and life in general more frankly (i.e. impostor syndrome). Think it's practically impossible to get a true gauge for how you're doing because you only see your own work product and experience and see what everyone else is doing from afar. You operate under the assumption that everyone else has it together; you're the only odd man out. 

There really isn't a clear comparable because in sports etc, everyone's on the stage and you can clearly see how you're fairing up against others. Even in school everyone in your class would receive the same tasks / assignments and talk about their grasp of it (e.g. you'd know if everyone struggled on the test or if it was just you). But in IB you're not staffed with any other analyst who's trying to do your task or put your exact page together. The only ones who see your performance relative to other analysts are the senior bankers who are staffed with both you and other analysts in your class.

My entire perspective changed when a senior spoke to me about essentially this very topic. Believe it or not, he had the very same feeling - went through his entire first year thinking he was the worst in his class and maybe even at risk of being laid off - then got top bucket for every year of his career, including this first one. Proceeded to get early promotions, made it to group head, basically maxed out what you can do in banking.

Think this kind of thought is healthy to a degree: it ensures you're never complacent, because you're always thinking that you're not good enough. 

All you can do is do your best.

You Gen Z analysts take feedback way too personally. Just don't take feedback personally, it's not a reflection on your intelligence or effort you put in if your PM or MD says the thing doesn't make sense. It probably just doesn't make sense. A lot of you are bad communicators too, learn to communicate and clearly explain your points and arguments through writing and presentation. There are a lot of books on those things. 

Last, the job is to be fast AND to be accurate. Need to be both even though there is the usual tension between doing things fast and doing things well. 

Bump

grab a VP or associate you vibe with and ask for honest feedback. and if you're just burnt out that's real too, don't ignore it

Ask your colleagues for their opinions. They may have experience that you can learn from. Talking to others can relieve stress.

Imposter syndrome hitting hard or did you actually mess something up? Big difference

bump

Thanx for sharing, hope for the best