I have hit rock bottom

Hey everyone, I’m really struggling and at my wits end, thought I might vent, and see if anyone else is in a similar boat.

I’ve gone through a lot personally. I grew with an abusive father, and I worked hard to break away from that path and become something better. In the past couple years, I’ve also dealt with painful family estrangement, becoming socially isolated from friends as I could no longer afford NYC and had to go back to my hometown, dealing with toxic managers at my temp jobs, and confronting deeper mental health struggles tied to my past.

I’m a 2023 graduate, and I feel like no matter how hard I try to build a stable, meaningful life, things keep falling apart.

I attended college as a nontraditional student, as the independent age on the FAFSA is age 24, which allowed me to avoid becoming financially beholden to my abusive family who refused to pay anything for college. This already set me back many years.

I still was able to write my hard life into amazing college essays, which allowed me to get accepted to a Duke/Dartmouth/Brown type school on a full ride, where I was able to graduate with a 3.7 GPA, land internships at brand-name Wall Street Investment Banking firms (sadly did not get the full time return offer despite my best efforts), and have spent the last few years trying to do everything “right” - working, networking, getting certifications, and staying disciplined.

But despite all of that, I’ve been stuck in long-term unemployment/underemployment. I’ve applied constantly, improved my skills, and even had higher-ups vouch for me, but I still can’t seem to find stable work. Most opportunities I get feel like dead ends.

In 2023 and 2024, I had a hard time getting interviews, often barely making it past the networking call or first round, but during the 2nd half of 2025 and this year, I have been getting to mid-to-final rounds regularly for roles and firms that I want. I just have not been able to convert anything into an offer.

I’ve tried to take responsibility for my life. I’ve worked on myself, gone to therapy, stayed disciplined, and kept pushing forward. But honestly, it feels like the harder I try, the more resistance I face.

I also see meaning in my career - I enjoy working in Restructuring and Distressed Credit because I came from a background of hardship, was able to change my life trajectory using the transformative power of education and scholarships, and I want to save struggling companies which will save jobs in towns like mine (rust belt area).

I have definitely hit rock bottom. I don’t see this as punishment, but I don’t understand why the path has to be this hard when I’m genuinely trying to do the right things, build a good life, and become a symbol of hope for suffering kids with abusive families.

I want to trust God and the Universe, but I feel lost.

Thanks for reading, if anyone else is struggling as much as I am, please feel free to share.