I have hit rock bottom

Hey everyone, I’m really struggling and at my wits end, thought I might vent, and see if anyone else is in a similar boat.

I’ve gone through a lot personally. I grew up with an abusive father, and I worked hard to break away from that path and become something better. In the past couple years, I’ve also dealt with painful family estrangement, becoming socially isolated from friends as I could no longer afford NYC and had to go back to my hometown, dealing with toxic managers at my temp jobs, and confronting deeper mental health struggles tied to my past.

I’m a 2023 graduate, and I feel like no matter how hard I try to build a stable, meaningful life, things keep falling apart.

I attended college as a nontraditional student, as the independent age on the FAFSA is age 24, which allowed me to avoid becoming financially beholden to my abusive family who refused to pay anything for college. This already set me back many years.

I still was able to write my hard life into amazing college essays, which allowed me to get accepted to a Duke/Dartmouth/Brown type school on a full ride, where I was able to graduate with a 3.7 GPA, land internships at brand-name Wall Street Investment Banking firms (sadly did not get the full time return offer despite my best efforts), and have spent the last few years trying to do everything “right” - working, networking, getting certifications, and staying disciplined.

But despite all of that, I’ve been stuck in long-term unemployment/underemployment. I’ve applied constantly, improved my skills, and even had higher-ups vouch for me, but I still can’t seem to find stable work. Most opportunities I get feel like dead ends.

In 2023 and 2024, I had a hard time getting interviews, often barely making it past the networking call or first round, but during the 2nd half of 2025 and this year, I have been getting to mid-to-final rounds regularly for roles and firms that I want. I just have not been able to convert anything into an offer.

I’ve tried to take responsibility for my life. I’ve worked on myself, gone to therapy, stayed disciplined, and kept pushing forward. But honestly, it feels like the harder I try, the more resistance I face.

I also see meaning in my career - I enjoy working in Restructuring and Distressed Credit because I came from a background of hardship, was able to change my life trajectory using the transformative power of education and scholarships, and I want to save struggling companies which will save jobs in towns like mine (rust belt area).

I have definitely hit rock bottom. I don’t see this as punishment, but I don’t understand why the path has to be this hard when I’m genuinely trying to do the right things, build a good life, and become a symbol of hope for suffering kids with abusive families.

I want to trust God and the Universe, but I feel lost.

Thanks for reading, if anyone else is struggling as much as I am, please feel free to share.

4 Comments
 

It sounds like you're carrying a tremendous weight, and yet, despite all the challenges, you've shown incredible resilience and determination. Based on the most helpful WSO content, here are some actionable steps and perspectives that might help you navigate this tough period:

1. Reframe Your Journey

  • Many WSO users emphasize the importance of perspective. While it feels like you're at rock bottom, remember that you've already overcome significant hurdles—escaping an abusive environment, excelling academically, and landing internships at top firms. These achievements are not small feats and demonstrate your capability to rise above adversity.

2. Focus on Networking

  • Networking is often highlighted as a game-changer, especially for those struggling to break into competitive roles. Use the WSO Networking Guide and platforms like LinkedIn to connect with alumni, former colleagues, or professionals in your target field. Focus on building genuine relationships rather than just asking for opportunities. Sometimes, a single strong connection can open doors.

3. Address the Interview Gap

  • Since you're reaching mid-to-final rounds but not converting, it might be worth revisiting your interview strategy. Consider:
    • Practicing behavioral questions to ensure your story resonates with interviewers.
    • Reviewing technical skills to ensure you're nailing case studies or technical rounds.
    • Seeking feedback from trusted mentors or peers who can provide constructive criticism.

4. Stay Proactive During Unemployment

  • WSO threads often stress the importance of staying active during unemployment to avoid gaps on your resume. Consider:
    • Taking on freelance or contract work in related fields.
    • Volunteering or joining a nonprofit where you can apply your skills.
    • Upskilling through certifications or courses in areas like financial modeling, coding, or even a new language.

5. Maintain a Routine

  • Establishing a daily routine can help you stay grounded. Dedicate specific hours to job applications, networking, and skill-building. Balance this with activities that nurture your mental health, like exercise, hobbies, or spending time with supportive people.

6. Leverage Your Story

  • Your background and resilience are powerful assets. When networking or interviewing, frame your story as one of overcoming adversity and using those experiences to fuel your passion for restructuring and distressed credit. Highlight how your unique perspective can add value to the firms you're targeting.

7. Seek Support

  • Isolation can make tough times even harder. Engage with communities, whether it's through forums like WSO, local groups, or even therapy. Sharing your struggles and hearing others' stories can provide comfort and new insights.

8. Set Short-Term Goals

  • Breaking down your larger goals into smaller, achievable steps can make the journey feel less overwhelming. For example:
    • Aim to send out 10 tailored applications per week.
    • Schedule 3 networking calls weekly.
    • Dedicate 1 hour daily to skill-building.

9. Stay Positive and Persistent

  • As one WSO user put it, "The best is yet to come." Keep pushing forward, even when it feels like progress is slow. Your persistence will pay off, and the lessons you're learning now will make your eventual success even more meaningful.

10. Consider Alternative Paths

  • If traditional finance roles feel like a dead end, explore adjacent opportunities that align with your skills and interests. For example:
    • Strategy or operations roles at startups.
    • Business development or product management roles.
    • Non-finance industries where your analytical skills are valued.

Remember, you're not alone in this struggle. Many have faced similar challenges and come out stronger on the other side. Keep believing in yourself, and don't hesitate to lean on the WSO community for advice and support. You've already proven your strength—this is just another chapter in your story.

Sources: Looking for Perspectives on Unemployment, How to deal with a recession career-wise? A few lessons learned during the previous GFC, Ask CompBanker, 9+ months of unemployment and feeling cursed…, Finding New Jobs

I'm an AI bot trained on the most helpful WSO content across 17+ years.
 
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It’s a bit hard to opine here as you’ve not really provided much details on what you’ve been doing since 2023, but it sounds like you never landed a “real” career and built tangible skills?

If you have a 3.7 from the caliber schools you mentioned I would probably just do a 1 year finance masters (at a target school; might have to go to Europe for this) and have “another bite at the apple” so to speak. 

Now I get that’s more $$$ spent and your family isn’t supporting you but that’s what federal student loans are for and tons of us have had to graduate with student loans betting on landing a job which makes it worthwhile.

 

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