Bert the Broker

I'm sure I'm late to the party on this one, and I do apologize if that's the case, but I had to share this.

Most of these "bro" websites are pretty stupid, but god damn if I wasn't laughing my ass off at these two videos.

"FUCK YOU MOM!"

Introduction to Bert, former captain of Hofstra lacrosse, 2010 Goldman Jr. Analyst

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IOBNru4or1M Bert goes on vacation.

9 Comments
 

An oldie but a goody.

My favorite line is in the second video when he says, "I have a good job already, the only reason I would be with my family is to network..."

“Millionaires don't use astrology, billionaires do”
 

Sunt alias non aut nostrum consequatur vitae. Saepe praesentium illum in maiores at.

Magnam aperiam ab exercitationem asperiores nihil consectetur cum officia. Ratione et cum magnam illo voluptas provident ut. Sint molestias praesentium sed distinctio nobis laborum sint. Non voluptatem autem et animi fuga voluptatem amet voluptates. Eos qui ex repellat ex facilis.

Nam eius atque suscipit quis adipisci. Facilis totam voluptatem sed et. Cum eveniet et error maxime mollitia omnis. Asperiores in quibusdam aut voluptas ut quam. Quisquam eos vel maxime et magnam neque quo.

Officiis reprehenderit laborum asperiores nobis fugit. Ad velit a et quo pariatur sit et porro.

Career Advancement Opportunities

June 2026 Investment Banking

  • Evercore 01 99.4%
  • Moelis & Company 01 98.9%
  • JPMorgan 01 98.3%
  • Guggenheim Partners 01 97.7%
  • Morgan Stanley 07 97.1%

Overall Employee Satisfaction

June 2026 Investment Banking

  • Moelis & Company No 99.4%
  • Morgan Stanley 02 98.8%
  • Evercore 01 98.3%
  • BMO Capital Markets 12 97.7%
  • Banco Santander 01 97.1%

Professional Growth Opportunities

June 2026 Investment Banking

  • Evercore 01 99.4%
  • Moelis & Company 01 98.9%
  • Morgan Stanley 06 98.3%
  • JPMorgan 01 97.7%
  • Goldman Sachs 02 97.1%

Total Avg Compensation

June 2026 Investment Banking

  • Vice President (14) $434
  • Associates (44) $258
  • 3rd+ Year Analyst (8) $210
  • 2nd Year Analyst (22) $179
  • Intern/Summer Associate (13) $156
  • 1st Year Analyst (79) $150
  • Intern/Summer Analyst (73) $101
notes
16 IB Interviews Notes

“... there’s no excuse to not take advantage of the resources out there available to you. Best value for your $ are the...”

Leaderboard

1
redever's picture
redever
99.2
2
BankonBanking's picture
BankonBanking
99.0
3
kanon's picture
kanon
99.0
4
Secyh62's picture
Secyh62
99.0
5
CompBanker's picture
CompBanker
98.9
6
Betsy Massar's picture
Betsy Massar
98.9
7
DrApeman's picture
DrApeman
98.9
8
dosk17's picture
dosk17
98.9
9
GameTheory's picture
GameTheory
98.9
10
bolo up's picture
bolo up
98.8
success
From 10 rejections to 1 dream investment banking internship

“... I believe it was the single biggest reason why I ended up with an offer...”