Co-worker disappears in the middle of the day

Here's something that has been debated on my team, wanted to see if anyone had a similar situation/insight.

For facts, the team I'm on is hybrid, couple days in the office. 

We had a "new" individual start on our team ~7 months ago. Seems like a good person, get along with everyone, fits in mostly. Since starting, this individual has some strange activities, mainly, comes in everyday (so not hybrid; they also have close to an hour commute, so you'd think they wouldn't want to do it everyday)  takes between a 2-3 hour lunch/break. Just gets up and disappears for a big chunk of the afternoon. Sometimes an extended break later in the day as well.  (Our team is pretty entrepreneurial, nothing is micro managed. Basically get work done as needed and keep clients happy, so its possible to be gone that long). No one really wants to confront this individual as (a) none of the higher ups seem to care (b) its not really our business. Just seems very strange, wanted to know if anyone would have ideas of what could be going on or if they were in an experience where an employee just left for part of the day. 

Ideas that have been kicked around of what could be going on:

1. an affair/thing on the side

2. Extended gym break with shower/sauna

3. Just a super extended lunch

4. Multiple jobs

36 Comments
 

Stop trying to out me.

And you said it yourself: "Basically get work done as needed and keep clients happy, so its possible to be gone that long".  Kind of my motto.

They're W-2, not 1099. Salary, not hourly.

The poster formerly known as theAudiophile. Just turned up to 11, like the stereo.
 

Interesting 

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee
 
rem29

Sometimes I go to the stairwell, walk down ~40 flights then right back up to break up my day

I used to do neuroscience research at a hospital that encouraged taking the stairs. Some days I would do legs before work and completely blow out my quads. Then at times a coworker and I would have to go to the pharmacy together 6 floors down. I would say 'lets just take the elevators' and they would say 'no the stairs is much healthier!' I would feel like I was dying haha but smiled amidst the pain.

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee
 
Most Helpful

My guess would be extended workouts. If I was able to go to the office and leave for 2.5 hours to get a solid workout in and then shower, I would come in far more regularly. It is really brutal to lift for 2 hour increments and have to start at 7-8 PM after getting home from work. If the dude is clearly in above average shape, this would likely explain it. If you're spending 2+ in the gym and dont look like a body builder or a powerlifter you're just straight up bad at working out, do a ton of cardio, or dont eat correctly. 

He could also have a GF that WFH near the office and maybe he drops by to spend time with her? 

Just my $0.02

 
tackotueeeesday

i leave for like 1.5 hrs every day. 45 minute shit and 45 minute lunch

45min sh**? What is wrong with you? Taco Bell addiction?

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee
 

It's a thinkin' seat

"If you don't have any enemies in life you have never stood up for anything" - Winston Churchill | "It's a testament to the sheer belligerence of the profession that people would rather argue about the 'risk-adjusted returns' of using inferior tooth cleaning methods." - kellycriterion
 

Workouts for sure. Honestly if no one cares you should also consider a midday workout or long lunch, clearly it's not impacting their work and it's a nice break

Array
 

I know in the past I was a screw up. I did this, and the reason was I had drugs/crime to do (unfortunately). My point is: he could be up to anything! I would follow him (like someone above mentioned) to see and/or confront him in a "chill" way... then tell us the results!

 

I worked with a guy who moonlighted as a courier. He started randomly leaving with lame excuses for kids, church, doctor, car repair, etc. I bet he was slinging a few deliveries here and there.

 

Kevin25

probably 2.

I also go to gym during lunch time for 1 hour to get dressed

lol wut - 1hr to get dressed?!?

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee
 
[Comment removed by mod team]
 

I used to have the nickname “the ninja” because I would disappear for hours during the work day without telling anyone, but still get all my work done and do it better than anyone else. 

What I was doing was working on my own deals (the deal of the century). Too small for my employer to be interested in.  This was in my late 20’s, early 30’s.  Also, I was getting a MBA part time (they knew about it when they hired me), and sometimes there were events, etc.  Also, I was taking care of my dad who had dementia.

When you do this, it’s best to keep it to yourself.  You can talk about taking care of a family member, most people are sympathetic - but only to the extent you pull your weight.

I also used to work until 2am a lot, and my boss was an early riser, so used to joke that we ran a 24/7 operation.  

Career Observation:

So what eventually happened to me?  I eventually got fired after four years.  My carried interest got forfeited upon termination (per contract - that’s why I said carry can be a mirage).  I was terminated not because of being the ninja, but because the company changed so much from an entrepreneurial start up-like company to a global brand.  My skillset and personality didn’t fit the more corporate mold and I had a natural resistance to silo’ing myself in roles that didn’t match my personality (new roles that a blue chip company would hire for and attract many candidates).  If I look back, the ninja was and is who I am, and the early stage company was where I thrived.  However, I often wonder could I have faked the company line and led a more comfortable life; but then I observed that I was the first of many from the start-up days that got canned, and my departure was part of a major culture shift.  The company changed and became more ruthless.

Your post reminded me those earlier times.  If your co-worker is being the ninja, recognize that nothing really stays the same.  While you are observing him/her, you might miss the tectonic shifts in the company to adjust to.  Worry about yourself more. In 5 years, it is unlikely (less than 25%) you both will still be working at that company. 

Have compassion as well as ambition and you’ll go far in life. I am interested in digital immortality. Check out my blog at digitalimmortality.com
 

Preach fellow ninja. I didn't get that nickname, but similar experience. Was always first in the office by 8, left at 4:30 (they wanted a 9-6 schedule and I said toss that because I'll still get it all done and I'll be available after hours anyways. Sure enough, when doing WFH days I'd be on at 7ish and already talking with the east coast clients), ate lunch at my desk for a quicker lunch break, would take 15 minute breaks and not tell anyone for sanity and stress, still pulled all nighters, got all the work done and way above par, silo'ed myself in a separate office so I could get the work done, but the company culture changed from up on high and my behavior was ruled out so I was tossed out.

The poster formerly known as theAudiophile. Just turned up to 11, like the stereo.
 

A at enim id tenetur. Amet atque est hic corporis optio qui. Et sed rerum velit rem dicta minus natus. Dolor iste consequatur hic nihil.

Aliquam minus et molestias et dolor accusamus quo. Id est omnis ut aut id tempora quis. Fugiat aut voluptatum hic. Veritatis iste exercitationem facere debitis quis.

 

Voluptas quis occaecati rerum ullam accusantium hic. Esse est earum quaerat qui et iure et. Aliquam voluptas consequuntur magni velit veritatis doloribus. Est quaerat blanditiis sed quo dolores ipsa atque maxime.

Et atque aut non omnis. Quod ducimus dolore ex perspiciatis. Eum culpa porro aut quas nesciunt accusantium. Maiores beatae saepe atque voluptas aut. Pariatur fuga sunt est necessitatibus est eaque.

Career Advancement Opportunities

June 2026 Investment Banking

  • Evercore 01 99.4%
  • Moelis & Company 01 98.9%
  • JPMorgan 01 98.3%
  • Guggenheim Partners 01 97.7%
  • Morgan Stanley 07 97.1%

Overall Employee Satisfaction

June 2026 Investment Banking

  • Moelis & Company No 99.4%
  • Morgan Stanley 02 98.8%
  • Evercore 01 98.3%
  • BMO Capital Markets 12 97.7%
  • Banco Santander 01 97.1%

Professional Growth Opportunities

June 2026 Investment Banking

  • Evercore 01 99.4%
  • Moelis & Company 01 98.8%
  • Morgan Stanley 05 98.3%
  • JPMorgan No 97.7%
  • BMO Capital Markets 12 97.1%

Total Avg Compensation

June 2026 Investment Banking

  • Vice President (14) $434
  • Associates (44) $258
  • 3rd+ Year Analyst (8) $210
  • 2nd Year Analyst (22) $179
  • Intern/Summer Associate (13) $156
  • 1st Year Analyst (78) $151
  • Intern/Summer Analyst (73) $101
notes
16 IB Interviews Notes

“... there’s no excuse to not take advantage of the resources out there available to you. Best value for your $ are the...”

Leaderboard

1
redever's picture
redever
99.2
2
Secyh62's picture
Secyh62
99.0
3
BankonBanking's picture
BankonBanking
99.0
4
kanon's picture
kanon
99.0
5
GameTheory's picture
GameTheory
98.9
6
CompBanker's picture
CompBanker
98.9
7
DrApeman's picture
DrApeman
98.9
8
dosk17's picture
dosk17
98.9
9
Betsy Massar's picture
Betsy Massar
98.9
10
Jamoldo's picture
Jamoldo
98.8
success
From 10 rejections to 1 dream investment banking internship

“... I believe it was the single biggest reason why I ended up with an offer...”